No Love Like The First Love
by buhbuhbecca
Summary: The summer before sixth year everything was perfect. Lily refused to date James, Sirius remained aloof toward the female population of Gryffindor, Remus' friends knew about his lycanthropy, and Claire was managing witchcraft and her parents' expectations. How could one year change so much? Follow the story of Sirius, Remus, and Claire as they navigate Hogwarts and first loves.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Remus Lupin lay in a deep sleep on a dark summer evening. Although the house was thick with the summer air, the windows remained closed. Lyall pushed the door open slightly to peer in upon his young son, his pride and joy. The door creaked slightly, but Remus didn't stir. His leg hung out of the side of the bed from under the sheets and a few beads of sweat ran from his forehead on his pillow.

Lyall quietly stepped into the room and pulled the comforter back from his son's bed so that he wouldn't overheat. He raised his wand toward the ceiling fan which responded by increasing in speed and creating a low hum along with a slight breeze in the bedroom.

This was not the first night this week that Lyall had arrived home significantly past his son's bedtime. The Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures had recently become understaffed; some members had moved into other departments and some had become injured while working and were recovering at St. Mungos. As a result, Lyall had become overextended at work and was finding himself spending more and more time away from home.

He missed his wife, he missed his son; but his job was too important to ignore. Fenrir Greyback was continuing to terrorize both the wizarding and muggle communities. Lyall felt that he was getting closer by the day to locating him and bringing him into their custody. If only a few months ago his colleagues had listened to him; so many lives could have been saved.

However, Fenrir was released. A monster, let loose upon the world and allowed to wreak havoc by Lyall's own department. _Souless, evil, deserving nothing but death._ Those words had replayed in his head daily since he was asked to leave the meeting with his colleagues. Lyall remembered the door shutting behind him, knowing they would all come to regret the decision to allow Fenrir Greyback to go free. Since that moment, the opinion of Greyback had changed and it became a priority to find and detain him.

Lyall gave his young son a tender kiss on the forehead and quietly shuffled his way toward the doorway. He carefully shut the door behind him and made his way toward his bedroom to get some well-deserved sleep. The house fell quiet again, only the hum of ceiling fans and the occasional sound of a mouse could be heard in the small cottage. Everything was peaceful.

Remus rolled his small body over onto his side and murmured in his sleep. He remained peacefully asleep, even as the window to his room swung open and the full moon shone upon his floor. The small boy didn't notice as a dark figure pulled itself in the window and set foot in his room. He didn't hear the creak in the floor as the large grey-skinned beast crept from the window toward his bed.

Lyall Lupin shot straight up in bed upon hearing a blood-curdling scream from down the hall. Adrenaline pumped rapidly through his veins as he blindly grabbed for his wand at the nightstand next to his bed.

"Stay here." He turned to his wife who was about to open the door to her room and dash down the hallway. Lyall edged his way in front of her and closed the door behind him. He ran as quickly as he could down the hall, hearing another scream come from his son's room.

His heart felt as though it could jump right out of his chest. Panic set in. Lyall pushed the door to Remus' bedroom open and saw Fenrir Greyback standing over his son. Remus' body mangled on the ground next to his bed. Blood covered the floor of the childhood bedroom, bloody handprints on the comforter that Lyall had just pulled back from the bed not that long ago.

Lyall raised his wand and pointed it at a smiling Fenrir Greyback, who now knew that he had an audience. A red light flashed through the bedroom toward Fenrir who jumped out of the way. Lyall threw curse after curse at him, working through what felt like every spell he had ever been taught. Fenrir easily dodged them. Lyall threw one last curse toward Fenrir who slipped out of the window and into the dark night.

* * *

Lyall and Hope sat in the waiting room at St. Mungos. No words passed between the couple. They sat in silence, grasping each other's hand in an desperate attempt to comfort each other. No healers had spoken with them since the moment they dashed into the building with their bleeding and unconscious son in their arms. The staff had immediately taken the necessary information and pulled Remus from their grasp and moved him into their care.

Hours had passed, but to the Lupin's it had felt as though years had gone by. Lyall looked around the waiting area. Some witches and wizards looked sick themselves, some had puss-fillled boils on their hands, others had skin that changed colors as the time crept by. Others looked to be in their position, healthy but waiting in grim anticipation for news.

The door to the waiting area swung open and Hope and Lyall both squeezed each other's hands harder. "Lupin?" Said a matronly looking witch who was wearing the St. Mungos uniform. Taking a deep breath, they stood and walked over to the healer who escorted them toward a room. The healer opened a door and Lyall got to look at his son for the first time in hours.

Remus looked so tiny underneath the blanket of the large bed. His four-year-old body didn't belong in a bed large enough to fit a fully grown adult. His light-brown hair still had some flecks of blood in it, but the blood that had been on his body appeared to be cleaned from his skin. His fair skin had scars, some the length of his whole body and others shorter but deeper.

"He sustained a lot of injuries." The healer looked at Hope who had tears welling in her eyes, "We are lucky that you arrived here when you did, if you had arrived shortly after I'm not sure what we would have been able to do. A whole team of healers worked on stopping the bleeding."

"The scars-" Hope said weakly, "Will they… will they fade over time?"

"I'm afraid," The healer said gently, "due to the nature of the injury we don't feel that many of them will. Werewolf wounds are- well, the best we can hope for is that they fade some but we don't feel that they will ever completely heal."

"Was he infected?" Lyall hadn't made eye contact with the healer until this moment. He knew the answer before she even opened her mouth to respond. Her eyes conveyed such sympathy.

"He was."

"What can we do for him? Will he be able to lead a normal life?" Hope sat in the chair next to her son's bed and looked desperately at the healer.

"I think it may be best, for now, to focus on the healing that we can do here at ." The witch said quietly, "He has a lot of progress to make before we will feel confident sending him home. I will give you both some time with your son and find my supervisor to come and speak with you."

Lyall sat on the armrest of his wife's chair and placed his hand on her back while they both wept silently. Daylight began to creep into the room, illuminating the young boy who was also a werewolf. Lyall looked upon Remus and made a silent promise to himself to do as much as he was capable to give Remus a normal life.

* * *

"So the Lord speaks to us," The sun shone upon the face of a priest as he stood at the pulpit of a small church. "He asks us, begs us, to renounce evil and walk down his prosperous path."

A young girl with dark brown hair and deep blue eyes folded the church pamphlet into an origami swan while sitting in the front pew of the church. Her mother, a lithe woman with blonde hair and the same deep blue eyes, sat next to her with her feet crossed at the ankles and her hands neatly together on her lap. She looked proudly up at the priest.

"We are all called upon to be shining examples of our Lord's work." He continued, his congregation at full attention as they always were each Sunday. "It does not mean that it will be easy, but it will be worth it."

Claire's mother placed her hand on top of her paper swan to give her a silent warning to pay attention to the homily. Claire blushed and looked up toward her father standing at the pulpit. He smiled at her briefly and then continued.

"In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen." The congregation responded and began to pull out their hymnals. Claire stood and began to move her way out of the pew. She quickly made a fist to hide the tiny origami swan inside of her hand.

"Claire Anne- where are you going?" Her mother whispered at her.

"Restroom." Claire said quietly in response and headed toward the door that connected to the parish hall. As she closed the door she heard the congregation begin to sing their hymn. She let out deep breath and began to wander her way to the bathroom taking much more time than was needed. Once in the bathroom, she closed the door and slid the lock into place.

Claire sat on the cold tile floor, her powder blue dress spreading around her. This was not the way she wished to spend her 11th birthday. However, this year her birthday fell on a Sunday which meant there was a family responsibility to be at the church for the 8:00 AM and 10:00 AM service. There would be a coffee hour after each service, and generally her father would spend some time talking with members who needed guidance after that.

Her birthday would be celebrated later, God came first. She sighed.

Claire opened her fist and looked at the paper crane. She finished the last few folds so that it took the correct shape and smiled at it. _I wish_ _you could actually fly away from here and take me with you._ She thought looking at her handy work.

It's not that she didn't care for her family or the congregation, it's just that she didn't want to spend all of her time at the church. Her father had committed himself to be a priest, that his calling. Claire didn't have a choice, she didn't have a calling. She wished she could spend her time going to the drive-in theater and reading books like others her age did. Instead, she spent her evenings folding pamphlets for the church and attending bible study.

Kids her age were able to read fantasy stories of princesses, dragons, even ghosts. Her father didn't allow those types of things in their household. It was a distraction from the stories they should be focusing on, the stories in the Bible. Claire was an only child, she desperately wanted to please both of her parents so she respected their wishes. However, not having those stories in the house never stopped her from wishing there were dragons, mermaids, and other mystical creatures.

She looked at the paper crane again, wondering what it would be like to be able to fly. Suddenly, she took a sharp breath. No, it couldn't be! She must be delirious from the heat of the church. Claire could have sworn she saw the wings of the paper crane move on it's own. She stared at it again, more intently this time.

The wings stood still for a moment and then fluttered again. This time they fluttered so much the small paper crane hovered above her hand for a few seconds. Claire sat there with her mouth open.

There was a rapping on the door and the paper crane fell to the floor.

"Claire? Are you in there?" Her mother's voice said clearly from the other side of the door.

Claire stood, smoothed out her dress and then flushed the toilet before turning on the water and washing her hands. She would never tell her parents what had happened with the paper crane. They would never believe her.

After the service was over, Claire and her parents drove to their small home together. She sat quietly in the backseat looking out the window convincing herself that she had imagined what happened earlier. She tuned out her parents voices as they discussed the homily from the two services today, lost in her own thoughts. All three were preoccupied as they entered their driveway, that they never noticed a large tawny owl perched on the roof of their home. When parking their car, the owl spread its large wings and silently flew away.

* * *

"Sirius Black, you will sit down at the table and you will speak to your mother with the respect that she deserves." The commanding voice of Mr. Black came from the end of a long table in a relatively dark but large room.

"I won't sit here and listen to this-" Sirius barked back at him.

"Such disrespect!" Mrs. Black's harsh voice shot through the room while she sat at the opposite end of the table cutting through a piece of roast beef. "Your first-born son, who we do everything for, talks to me like this all day."

"I wonder where I learned that from." Sirius said sarcastically pushing his plate of food away from himself, "I only listen to both of you talk in a disrespecting tone about other witches, wizards, and muggles on a consistent basis."

"Don't you dare use that word in my home!" Mr. Black's voice boomed as he stood. Sirius swallowed and looked down at the table.

"We are pure-blood." Mrs. Black seethed, "We are wizards. We are superior to the non-magical."

"No." Sirius said through gritted teeth.

"Do you know what I found in your son's room today?" Mrs. Black said becoming more angry by the minute. "Muggle posters, on his wall. Pictures of muggle women!" The disgust she felt was clear through her tone of voice.

Sirius sat in silence. Only a few more days until he could head to his first year at Hogwarts. Only a few more days of having to be around his intolerable family. Time seemed to creep by as slowly as it possibly could as he waited for his opportunity for freedom.

"I burned them all." Mrs. Black said pointing at her son, "However, every day he keeps finding more. Bringing that filth into our home. Tarnishing the Black family name!"

"Let me just cut to the end of this conversation," Sirius looked at his mother, "I will continue to bring those posters into my room. I don't care about tarnishing the Black family name. Lastly, do you want to know why I have pictures of muggle women in my room?"

"Sirius, don't speak to your mother using that tone" His father said loudly trying to cut him off.

"It's because I think they're attractive!" He yelled over his father and stood up to face his mother who was shaking with anger.

"Get out of my dining room!" She yelled at him pointing toward the stairs.

"Gladly!" Sirius stomped out of the dark dining room and toward his room. He slammed the door behind him and threw himself on his bed. The fights with his family were continuing to get worse. This was not the first day this week that he would go to bed hungry. It was definitely not the first day this week that he had interrupted the Black family dinner with a screaming match with his parents.

He got off his bed and pulled opened a drawer in his room that had socks in it. He shifted the sock to the side to reveal pictures. The pictures were all different shapes and sizes. Some were from magazines, others had been torn out of books, and some were posters that he had bought while wandering around local shops. His mother would be horrified to see the collection of muggle images that he had brought into this house.

The Black family were proud of their heritage. Pure-blood, that's what they referred to themselves as. Sirius didn't see anything to be proud of when he looked at the Black family tree. Cousins marrying cousins, that's all he saw. When you are desperately trying to keep your blood pure, there aren't many options when it comes to continuing the family line. He wondered if it was inbreeding or just paranoia that had led his family to become this adamant in their hatred toward non-magical people.

The superiority that they felt toward the world around them was palpable from a young age. His parents were in control of who he socialized with, which meant he had only been able to spend time with other family members or other pure-blood families who shared similar deplorable values. At a young age, Sirius began to reject the values he had been taught. He realized that there was nothing righteous in feeling superior to others.

Since he had gotten his letter to Hogwarts, his parents had been spending more and more time 'educating' him on whom he should socialize with. They spent time telling him about the other children his age who have Slytherin heritage, because they were determined to see him placed in the same house they were as children.

Sirius pulled some muggle tape from inside of one of his socks and began to tape more pictures to the walls. He opened the door to his room and taped a large poster of a popular muggle celebrity in a bikini to the outside of his door, knowing he would do everything he could to never turn into his parents.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"What can we do for him?" Remus sat in the chair of another healer's office looking at the ceiling and attempting to block out the conversation his parents were having.

"I'm sorry Mr. Lupin," The healer's kind voice floated through the tension of the room, "I have tried every treatment that I have been trained to use, but we just don't currently have a successful treatment for lycanthropy."

"Isn't there anything that we haven't tried yet?" Mrs. Lupin's voice sounded desperate and shaky.

"The transformations are so painful for him," Mr. Lupin started again, "Is there anything we can do to ease the pain? Is there anything experimental we can try? He's getting stronger every day and it-" He stopped remembering his son was sitting in the room with him.

"It's dangerous for them" Remus said shamefully. He made eye contact with the healer who smiled sadly at him.

"You're my son,"Mrs. Lupin said now with tears in her eyes, "You are not dangerous to me."

"I am, mum." Remus said calmly putting his hand on hers. "I'm dangerous. I would never forgive myself if I hurt either of you- if I hurt anyone."

"I know of a healer," The wizard said looking upon the family with sympathy, "He's located in Ireland. He is extremely talented, I think he might be happy to take on your case and see if there is anything he can do. However, I feel that I need to be honest with all of you. At best, we could find a way to manage the symptoms, but there is no cure for lycanthropy."

They all sat in silence for a moment.

Remus stared at the ceiling again. He was a burden to his family. At 11 years old, he knew he wouldn't be able to attend Hogwarts given his condition. So, he would stay at home with his parents and every month would continue to be a danger to them. He had no means to move out on his own, and even if he could he was just as dangerous out in the world alone as he was in his parents house.

What if when he changed he wandered out of his own flat into the streets of London and attacked people? What if when he came back he had someone else's blood on his hands? He couldn't handle the thought of any of those things happening.

They would find stronger locks, bigger doors, more healers who would offer different treatments. They would continue to move houses when neighbors and co-workers began to detect his symptoms. The Lupin family would somehow manage this and maybe, just maybe, someone would find a way to make him less dangerous. He had to hold on to that hope. It was either that or give in to the self-loathing and despair.

The Lupin family left the office of the healer and all huddled together under one umbrella while they walked silently toward their car. His father, never learning the muggle skill of driving, got into the passenger seat and Remus walked over with the umbrella to help his mother stay dry until she could get into the driver's seat. After both of his parents were settled in the car, Remus opened the door and sat in the back of their small sedan.

"Remus," His father turned around and looked warily at him, "Your mother and I love you so much. We will keep looking for another opinion."

Remus looked at his father and gave him a weak smile. His mother turned the key in the ignition and the car engine rumbled alive. Remus' parents talked quietly in the front seat about the hope they had with this new healer. They would begin to plan their trip to his office for later this week. His mother would request some more time off from work and they would all go together. For a moment, he wondered what his mother told her boss when she requested time off from work. Did she tell them he was sick? Maybe she told them he had cancer? Maybe they took pity upon poor Hope Lupin and her perpetually ill son.

Remus tried hard to smile and nod along to let his parents believe he was also feeling hopeful about this new healer. However, in the pit of his stomach all he felt was shame. What would his parents life be like if they had a normal son? Would they all go on holiday together every summer? Would they have permanent jobs? Would they invite the neighbors over for dinner during the holidays? Would Remus be allowed to spend time with friends?

Although he was incredibly grateful for the life his parents had provided him with, he was so lonely. Once a month on the full moon, his parents would lock him in his room to go through the agonizing process of turning into a monster on his own. He would feel as if his skin was burning and splitting and when the process was done and no one was around to bite, he would become desperate and bite himself.

Remus hated every moment of it, but he most hated that he had to suffer through it alone.

* * *

The Lupin family arrived at the tiny flat they had been renting and turned the key in the door. No sooner had they closed the door to the flat that there was a knock at it. Hope Lupin opened the door and standing there was a tall wizard with a long gray beard. He was wearing periwinkle robes and stood holding a yellowing envelope in his long delicate fingers.

"Good afternoon," His gentle voice drifted into the flat, "Would I be able to bother you for a cup of tea?"

Lyall Lupin rushed over to the door and opened it widely. He whispered in his wife's ear and she headed into the small kitchen to begin to boil some water for tea.

"I would like to speak with all of you about Hogwarts" The man said while walking into the flat, "I know that most of the time we just send a letter, but I felt that in this case a personal touch was needed."

Remus looked at him as he sat down in their tiny kitchen.

"You must be Remus" He reached across the table and extended his hand to him, Remus shook it hesitantly.

"Yes, I am" Remus said quietly.

"I'm Albus Dumbledore," He smiled at Hope as she placed a teacup and some hot tea in front of him, "Headmaster of Hogwarts."

"Headmaster Dumbledore," Lyall said quickly, "I have to be honest, I'm very surprised to see you here."

"You shouldn't be that surprised, Lyall" Dumbledore's eyes twinkled when he said that, "Remus did just turn 11."

"Yes, but…" Lyall looked to his son while Hope scurried around the kitchen looking for biscuits.

"I'm sure you know he's not a squib." Dumbledore looked over at Remus and smiled at him.

"I'm a werewolf." Remus said flatly.

"Remus!" Hope said nearly dropping the plate with biscuits on the table.

"Yes," Dumbledore said, "I'm very aware."

"Then you know that it's dangerous," Remus said while his mother tried to shush him, "For me to be around other students. It would be dangerous for me to be at Hogwarts."

"I think that accommodations can be made," Dumbledore picked up a biscuit and munched on it before finishing his thought, "That would allow you to receive your education and for the other students to remain safe and unaware."

"How?" Lyall said.

"There is a building outside of Hogsmeade that is abandoned that I have recently come to acquire," Dumbledore picked up another biscuit, "It also, fortunately, has a tunnel that connects to Hogwarts and is guarded by a very formidable tree that we planted there. I think, although you might have to spend some time away from your studies, this could be a perfect place for you to keep yourself safe."

Remus looked on as his mother smiled and his father looked proudly over at him. It had been so long since he had seen them both look so genuinely happy. He wished that they could both look this happy all of the time.

"However, the choice is yours Remus." Dumbledore peered over at him as if he could hear the conflict inside of him, "If you feel the risk is too great, you don't need to attend Hogwarts. I just felt it was important for you to know that Hogwarts is welcome to you."

Remus could feel happiness swell within him. He remembered being small and his father telling him about the large castle where he had learned magic. When he was a young boy he had always talked about what he would do first when he arrived. Even during the first couple years after he had been bitten, he had always felt confident that he would one day be a student at Hogwarts. It was only as he got older he came to the realization that dream would never come to fruition.

Now, over biscuits and tea on a rainy day, the dream that he had as a small child was alive and well.

"Okay, I accept."

* * *

Remus Lupin stood in a large empty office at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry. His footsteps echoed as he walked across the room with a suitcase in his hand. The hallways were eerily quiet as most students were in the Great Hall for the Sorting ceremony. He placed his tattered suitcase on the large wooden desk and began to unpack his few belongings.

He let out a contented sigh. It had been so long since he had a reliable job and even longer since he had set foot in the hallways of Hogwarts. A few months ago Dumbledore had approached him with the prospect of becoming the new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor at the school. After considering the potential consequences of being exposed as a werewolf to his students and their parents, he also considered the consequences of continuing to be unemployed.

Remus lived in shabby flats and moved every couple of months when his job fell through or his neighbors started to ask questions about the noises that they could hear through the walls. He couldn't remember the last time he had bought new robes or had the spare change to get a licorice wand. Although it was painful to admit that his friends had financially supported him, since Lily and James had died the difficulty he had with finding employment had become devastating to his already low quality of life.

The few books that he brought with him were placed on the large bookshelf in his office. Empty space and cobwebs surrounded his books, punctuating how little he owned. He hung the few items of clothing that he had in the closet. At the bottom of his suitcase was a large piece of parchment that had been folded in half. He picked it up and held it delicately between his fingers. Remus plopped down into the comfortable chair and looked contentedly around his new home.

This evening had been draining for him. While he realized that Harry would be attending Hogwarts and be one of his students, it startled him to interact with his late best friend's son on the first evening as a professor. Harry looked so much like his parents. Looking at him created an oddly familiar but painful feeling for Remus. Seeing the eyes of Lily and the unruly hair of James brought back a slew of memories.

Remus opened the piece of parchment and began to read the letter he had brought with him from his flat.

 _Dear Remus,_

 _Summer seems to be dragging on eternally! I cannot wait to get back to Hogwarts and start our coursework again. I miss the long hallways, the endless amounts of food, and the sound of a crowd at a Quidditch match. I even miss the musty smell of the dungeons during Potions lessons!_

 _My parents have told all of the members of our congregation that I attend a prestigious Christian boarding school, so I have been creating muggle versions of everyone I know at Hogwarts in an effort to make my stories seem genuine. You will be happy to know that I have described McGonagall as the strict maths instructor who has a no-nonsense attitude. Dumbledore is the kind and humble headmaster. Peeves is the chronically angry janitor. You, well, you are the caring and compassionate friend who I would travel to the_ _ **moon**_ _and back for._

 _I hope that your summer is going well. Did you ever get the chance to visit James and Sirius? While I know that you were looking forward to it, I feel jealous at the possibility of you three creating trouble in the Potter household without me. I wouldn't participate in the trouble, but I abhor the idea of missing out on the opportunity to scold you three._

 _Thank you for the offer to visit. I'm sure at this point you know that Sirius made a similar offer, but I don't think it is in the cards at this point in time. Once I have graduated and get my own flat, you will always be welcome to visit._

 _I am counting down the days until I see you again. Please send your response by muggle post if you can, my father will ground me until my early thirties if another owl shows up at this house._

 _Missing you terribly,_

 _Claire_

Remus took a moment to stare at the letter taking in the casually elegant handwriting that Claire had. There had been many letters exchanged between them during the seven years at Hogwarts, but this one he had kept.

This letter had been written in the summer before beginning their sixth year; a snapshot in time before everything about the dynamic of their group changed. Lily was still determined not to date James, Sirius remained aloof toward the female population of Gryffindor, all of his friends knew about his lycanthropy, and Claire remained a beacon of light in Remus' life.

Remus felt a heaviness settled in his chest. He looked at the letter one last time and folded it into a paper crane, just like Claire had taught him.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"I will not allow it!" Reverend Ludgrove spoke loudly across the dinner table. This was the third conversation this week about this topic: Hogwarts.

"Dad!" Claire said desperately, "Not going cannot change who I am!"

"You are not a witch." He said with finality.

Mrs. Ludgrove sat quietly in her seat holding her husband's hand in support.

"I am! You saw the letters."

After arriving home from church on Claire's birthday there had been a letter informing her that she had been accepted at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry. Her father, upon reading it, promptly threw it away and determined that it was a prank. A local teenager must have known that this was the priest's house and decided to play a joke on them.

Soon after that, another arrived. They kept arriving. Until there were multiple arriving per day. The final straw was when an owl sat outside of the kitchen window with five letters in it's beak. It patiently waited until Reverend Ludgrove opened the window and took the letters to fly away.

"We are a good Christian family." He said as calmly as he could, "I will not send my daughter off to learn witchcraft. I forbid it."

Claire looked to her mother for any support, but she remained silent.

"I already responded and accepted." Claire avoided eye contact with her father.

"Why am I being tested in this way?" He looked up at the ceiling, "Why is my faith being tested by my own blood?"

"Dad, this isn't about faith."

"Everything is about faith!"

"I love you dearly." Claire looked at both of her parents, "I don't want to disappoint you, but I am a witch."

"Don't-" Her mother got up from the table with tears in her eyes.

"This idea of a magical world has gotten into your head," Her father said, "It's corrupted you, it's breaking your mother's heart. You need to let it go."

Chloe looked desperately at her father, unsure of what she could do to convince him. Magic is real. She knew it deep down in her heart. She suddenly got an idea, she got up from the table and picked up a piece of paper.

"What are you doing?"

"I want to prove it to you." Claire said while she quickly folded the paper into a crane like she did on the morning of her birthday.

"Stop it." Her father said, "You will not pretend to do magic in this household."

Claire continued to fold anyway. When making the final fold, she held her left palm flat facing toward the ceiling and placed the paper crane on it. She looked at her father for a moment. He looked so disappointed in her, her mother was still over by the sink crying. Claire wanted nothing more than to make them proud, but she didn't feel that she could deny who she was just to appease them.

She stared intently at the paper crane. Her father sighed, frustrated. She closed her eyes, and then suddenly felt the paper crane lift out of her hand. She opened her eyes again to see it fluttering above her palm like it did a couple weeks ago. Claire looked over at her parents to see them staring at her in shock.

The paper crane floated back toward her hand and landed.

"Dad," Claire looked at him. He had tears in his eyes, "For me it's not a matter of God or magic. I would like to think that maybe I could have both."

Reverend Ludgrove stood from the table and walked out of the room. Claire stared at him as his body faded into the darkness of the living room. Her heart sank, she had never felt her father be so disappointed in her before. She looked over at her mother.

"I will take you tomorrow," Mrs. Ludgrove said, "To get the things you need for school. You won't do or talk about magic in this house again. Understood?"

Claire squashed the paper crane in her hand. "Yes, mum."

* * *

Sirius stood at Platform 9 ¾ alone. His most recent barrage of Muggle posters had incited the worst bout of arguing that the Black family had seen in many years. Many nights he had found himself sneaking out of the house on Grimmauld Place to get some food. The evening before his first trip to Hogwarts, he was informed that his parents would not be taking him to King's Cross Station.

That worked just fine for Sirius, because he didn't really intend on having them come with him anyway. He had always planned on sneaking out early in the morning and heading over to the platform alone. At least now he could wake up at a less obscene hour and make his way into London.

He had a decent amount of time left before the train departed, so he pulled his trunk into the train and found himself a compartment. Sirius threw his feet up on the seat across from him and stretched out his body. Wasn't there supposed to be someone with a trolley offering snacks? Or did that not start until after the train departed? Either way, he was starving.

Sirius pulled some licorice wands out of his pocket that he had swiped from his parent's house. He began to munch happily on one while he looked out the window at some students beginning to arrive. He noticed a girl with brown wavy hair standing next to a tall thin woman dressed in modest clothing. Sirius, with nothing else to do, cracked open the window of the train to eavesdrop on their conversation.

"Please," The woman said calmly making very little eye contact with the girl, "If you can find a way to let me know that you arrived safely."

"I will, mum." The girl reached out for her mother's hand and gave it a light squeeze, "Could you let dad know that I will miss him?"

"Your father will miss you more than you know," Her mother said quietly.

"I wish that he was here."

"He- he's very busy Claire." Sirius peered over at the young girl. She played with the ends of her long hair and looked away from her mother. Tears were rolling down her cheeks. "You could still change your mind, come back home with me. Nothing would make him happier than seeing you walk through the door today."

They both stood there in awkward silence for a moment.

"I have to get going." Claire's mother leaned over and kissed her on the forehead. She took a deep breath and turned and walked away from the platform and through the entrance back into the world.

At this point more families were arriving on the platform by the second. Some families were large, others were small, all were smiling. Sirius turned himself away from the window and continued to munch on his licorice wand. Chatter began to fill the train as students looked for old friends and made new acquaintances.

He heard someone shouting "Out of my way! Out of my way!" as they drug their trunk down the hallway of the train. Students moved from compartment to compartment, their owls hooting loudly, trunks thudding as they make contact with the floor. Sirius looked up when he noticed someone step into his compartment. The girl he had been watching on the platform was standing there with her back to him. She was clearly struggling with moving her trunk which was now sticking partially out of the door. A line of students was starting to pile up in the hallway on both sides of her.

"I'm sorry!" She said quietly trying her best to pull the trunk but it clearly weighed much more than she did. "I'm sorry!"

Sirius stood up and tapped her on the shoulder. "I can get it."

Claire stepped further into the compartment and out of his way. Sirius gave the trunk a decent tug to get it into the compartment and then swiftly lifted it above him into the storage area.

"Thank you." She smiled at him. "I'm Claire."

"Licorice wand?" Sirius asked.

"Excuse me?"

"Would you like a licorice wand?" Sirius asked emphasizing the question by pausing in between the words.

"I- I don't really know what that is."

"Muggle, huh?" Claire stared blankly at him, "Non-magic family."

"Yes." Claire sat down across from him in the compartment by the window. Sirius hesitated for a moment, she was sitting where he had been resting his feet before. He placed his feet on the seat next to her instead. "Are you- do you mean that there are families that are magic for generations?"

"My family has had witches and wizards in it going back centuries." Sirius stated matter of factly. "It's a point of pride for the Black family. I'm Sirius by the way."

"You must know all about this school then." Claire's eyes sparkled as she spoke.

"I'm not sure that I know all about it, but I know a good amount." Sirius yawned, his dark hair falling in front of his face "I know enough to know I don't want to be in Slytherin."

"Slytherin?"

"Once you arrive at Hogwarts you will be sorted into one of four houses," He explained, "Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, or Slytherin. They're the names of the founders of Hogwarts."

Claire looked at him for a moment, taking in everything that he was saying.

"Anything off of the trolley?" A pleasantly plump lady asked as she poked her head into the compartment. Sirius shot up out of his seat. He picked out a variety of treats that he wanted and then looked over his shoulder at Claire. She had pulled a book out of her jacket pocket and was thumbing through the pages. Sirius doubled the amount of food and paid the woman.

Sirius placed a bunch of candy on Claire's book. "The first, and most important thing to know about the wizarding world is that we have the best candy."

Claire smiled up at him, "I don't know about that… have you ever even had Muggle candy?"

"I have." Sirius smirked at her question, "I am quite the expert on Muggle candy, but it is ultimately disappointing in comparison."

Claire and Sirius chatted contentedly as the train slowly began to move and start its long journey toward Hogwarts. Sirius told Claire more about the school, about the long winding hallways and the deep beautiful lake. She drunk in every word that he shared with her, feeling as if she was stepping into the storyline of one of the fantasy books that her father never allowed in the house.

"There is also Quidditch." A voice came into the compartment as Sirius and Claire were talking.

Claire looked over her left shoulder to see a young boy with black hair and hazel eyes. He appeared as if he had just rolled out of bed, his hair was haphazardly pointing in all directions.

"Quidditch?" Claire questioned.

"It's a wizard sport-" Sirius stated.

"It's the greatest sport." The boy said sitting down across from Claire and grabbing a piece of her candy. She was a bit put off by this and glanced over at Sirius to see if he knew this boy.

"Who's your team?" Sirius asked.

"Puddlemore United. You?"

"Hollyhead Harpies." Sirius shrugged, "We haven't had a great season in what feels like forever."

The boy looked over at Claire and raised his eyebrows at her as if he expected her to be following their conversation. She plopped the rest of the candy that had been laying on her open book onto the seat next to her and turned her eyes downward toward the book.

"She's a Muggle." Sirius chimed in. Claire noticed out of the corner of her eye Sirius extending his hand out to their new companion, "Sirius Black."

"James Potter." James shook hands with Sirius and then casually ran his hands through his already messy hair. "Do you have a name, or do you just read?"

"Claire Ludgrove." She reluctantly shook his hand.

"What are you reading?" James asked not really sounding too interested.

Claire seriously doubted that James cared about _Jane Eyre_ , he probably didn't even know who had written it or what it was about. She had no motivation to continue polite conversation with someone who had interrupted her. Her father's voice was in her head, urging her to be kind and patient.

"It's actually a book about the failures of Puddlemore United," Claire said ignoring her father's voice that was guilting her for her snippy response, "It's quite long."

James coughed, he had been mid-swallow on the piece of candy he had taken from Claire. Sirius smirked at her, his grey eyes lighting up as he gave a hearty chuckle.

"I wasn't expecting that from you." James said as Sirius tossed Claire another piece of candy.

"With a wit like that," Sirius said in between large bites of pumpkin pasties, "I think we're going to get along just fine."

Claire smiled at him, she glanced down at her book again to continue reading. James and Sirius fell into comfortable conversation about Quidditch and wizard's chess. For the most part, Claire tuned them out and focused on reading. On occasion she looked out the window watching the distant hills and trees move by her rapidly. As they got closer to the school, Claire convinced Sirius to pull down her trunk so that she could put her robes on. He reluctantly agreed.

"Maybe Madam Pomfrey can administer some potion so you grow." Sirius said as he pulled down the trunk.

"What does it matter?" Claire raised her eyebrows at him, "I'm going to learn to do magic, next year I could just levitate the trunk down."

"Great," Sirius huffed as he placed the trunk on the ground, "That means next year I could take a nap on the train ride instead of being your personal house elf."

"Who says I have any intention on sharing a compartment with you in the future?" Claire pulled her robes out of the trunk and motioned for Sirius to lift it back up to be stored.

James snorted loudly and Sirius shot him a look. Claire pulled her arms through the robes and fastened it near her neck. She smiled, the further she had gotten from her small home the more freedom that she felt. Growing up as the child of the leader of a church came with a great deal of pressure to behave in a certain way. Polite girls don't talk with candy in their mouth, they don't show anger, and they certainly don't respond sarcastically during conversations.

Sirius smiled at Claire in her Hogwarts uniform. Her presence in the compartment, on the way to a school to learn about magic, was in direct defiance of all of the values that his parents had. Her Muggle background, in their perspective meant she didn't belong in this compartment; they certainly would have never approved of him making friends with her. Claire's blue eyes shone proudly when she fastened her robes.

"Well look at that…" Sirius said, "I think you're officially a witch."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Complete and total darkness surrounded him. What did the sun look like? Sirius didn't think that he even remembered at this point. It had been two weeks since he had found himself locked in Azkaban, fourteen days since he had been thrown into this hellhole. It was amazing that he hadn't lost his mind yet. Was thinking that a sign that he was beginning to?

Sirius pressed himself up against the cold damp wall and pulled his knees into him. The floor was wet underneath of him, he could have moved to a drier spot but he felt the safest when he knew the wall was behind him and he was facing the door. If he was facing the door he could be prepared for whatever was coming his way next. Although there wasn't much he could do about the dementors, he felt more in control if he could know they were coming.

Sirius closed his eyes and tried to focus on what had happened to land him in this situation. Although it was painful to think of, he needed to ground himself in reality rather than give way to the fantasy that would surely drive him mad. James was gone. Lily was gone. Harry… he had survived, he was orphaned. Peter Pettigrew, he was the one who was responsible.

Anger surged through Sirius' veins. Betrayal couldn't even begin to describe what that rat had done to his best friends. He murdered them, his desire for power and respect had murdered the best friends he had ever had. Then to top it all off, Peter escaped. He was off living a free life while Sirius sat in this prison, framed for the murder of those who were dearest to him.

With his eyes closed, he pictured the warm Gryffindor Common Room; the sound of a roaring fire and the laughter of his friends. Sirius would give anything to have a full meal and a shower. How long could he keep this up? How long could he tolerate this torture before he welcomed madness with open arms?

 _Stop it_. Sirius said to himself, shaking his head and pressing his palms over his eyes. _You have to keep it together. It is important that you make it out of here. Harry needs you._

A clanking noise came from the door and Sirius opened his eyes quickly. A bowl was shoved into his room and Sirius rushed to his feet and grabbed the bowl and brought it back over to his spot against the wall. In the bowl was a sour smelling stew and a couple pieces of stale bread floating on top of it. He lifted the bowl to his mouth and drank down the soup ravenously. It was practically flavorless, but it was still nourishment. Sirius picked up a piece of stale bread and swirled it around in the stew that was leftover before shoving it into his mouth.

 _I am not guilty._ Sirius said to himself. _I need her to know I'm not guilty… if she's still alive, I need her to know I didn't do this. I have to get out of here._

* * *

"I think it might take a bit more than robes to be a witch." A smooth voice entered the compartment.

Claire turned her head to look at the compartment door and noticed a young boy of average height. He had dark hair that fell like curtains around his face; the roots of his hair appeared slightly oily. Next to him stood a thin girl with bright green eyes and dark red hair. Both had changed into their Hogwarts robes.

"Magical skill is what makes a witch." The boy stepped into the compartment. Claire noticed that James stood up out of his seat and moved next to Sirius.

"Well," Claire said timidly, "I haven't done much magic before. I'm not really sure how much magical skill I have."

"I'm sure you have plenty." Sirius glanced at the new face in the compartment hesitantly.

"Let's see then." The boy looked at Claire expectantly. The girl standing next to him placed her hands in the pockets of her robes.

Claire glanced at Sirius and pulled her wand out of her pocket. She didn't know of any specific spells, the only magic she had done before had been spontaneous and unimpressive. Sighing she glanced down at her feet.

"I don't know any spells." The disappointment in her voice was obvious.

"Of course you don't," James chimed in, "I grew up in a wizard family and I barely know any. That's why we're all here."

"Not even a simple levitation spell?" The boy glanced at Claire as if he were appraising her worth.

"I have read about them a little…" Claire trailed off while she fiddled with her wand, "I don't know the proper method though."

"Give it a shot." Sirius said, challenging this new presence in the compartment. Claire's eyes opened wide at his suggestion. It was too much pressure to perform magic in a compartment with people she had just met. "I'm sure it will be fine."

Claire took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. Her mind raced as she tried to remember every aspect of the levitation spell she had read about. Did she flick her wand or swish it? Was it both? Did you swish twice? How on earth did you pronounce the spell? She opened her eyes and stared at the copy of Jane Eyre that was sitting on the seat.

Claire lifted her wand and pointed it at the book. She shakily followed through with the motion she thought she remembered from her textbook while saying "Wingardium… Leviosa?" The book rose an inch off of the seat for a moment and then flopped back down on the cushioned seat.

"With a bit of practice," James said smirking at her, "You're going to earn Gryffindor house a few points with that spell." Claire couldn't control the smile on her face, she felt so accomplished.

"Gryffindor?" The boy said with obvious distaste in his voice, "Why on earth would she want to be in Gryffindor? Reading the textbook before school starts and executing a spell on the train to Hogwarts, I think those are more Slytherin qualities. Determination, cunning, resourcefulness. Everyone knows that Gryffindor is just a house filled with hot-headed egomaniacs."

"Watch yourself." Sirius growled at him, stepping forward.

"Slytherin is filled with power-hungry snakes." James glared at him. "Anyone with any moral compass knows to steer clear of anyone who dares call themselves a Slytherin with pride."

Claire stepped in front of Sirius as he advanced on the boy. She turned on her heel and faced the red-headed girl and her companion.

"I think that I will make my own decision on which house is best suited for me." Claire said quickly in the least confrontational way that she could muster, "I also think that it may be best if you left us so Sirius and James can change into their robes."

"Come on Severus." The girl said tugging at his sleeve. He narrowed his eyes at James and Sirius and then followed her down the hallway of the train.

"What a git." James said loudly as the boy walked away.

"Barging in on this compartment uninvited," Sirius paced slightly in the already tiny compartment as he spoke, "Then demanding Claire do magic on the spot to prove herself-"

"Which great job by the way." James chimed in with a smile.

"- She doesn't have to prove herself to anyone." Sirius continued to pace, "Then he insulted you with those comments about Gryffindor. I don't like the look of him. Probably up to his eyeballs in the dark arts."

Claire reached out and placed her hands on Sirius' shoulders to stop him from pacing. Watching him walk back and forth was starting to make her feel some motion sickness.

"It's not worth worrying about." Claire said calmly, trying her best to be the voice of reason.

"You're okay with him just waltzing in here and insulting you?" Sirius asked incredulously.

"No, of course not." Claire shook her head, "It's just not worth getting in trouble over before the school year even begins. Besides, we should be arriving in a moment. You really do need to put your robes on."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Claire sat in a large but uncomfortable chair in a slightly stuffy room. The sunshine shone through the window and directly into her eyes making her need to squint in order to see clearly. She shifted in her seat and crossed her ankles underneath the chair. While pulling nervously on the sleeves of her robes, she glanced over at the stern looking wizard sitting across from her.

He wore dark blue robes and had thinning grey hair on the top of his head. Square glasses sat upon his rather round face. His eyes were turned downward toward a piece of paper that he held with his stubby fingers.

"You received Outstanding N.E.W.T. scores in Charms, Herbology, Potions, and Transfiguration and Exceeds Expectations N.E.W.T scores in History of Magic and Defense Against the Dark Arts?" His reedy voice rose over the paper and toward her.

"Yes," Claire said calmly with a smile on her face, "That's correct sir."

The man glanced over the paper and at her cautiously. She gave him a polite smile and he looked back down at her qualifications.

"No experience since leaving Hogwarts, is that right?"

"No- well, what I mean…" Claire stumbled over her words, "I mean that you're correct. I have no experience since leaving Hogwarts. I worked some at Honeydukes in Hogsmeade, but no Ministry experience."

"Why is that?" He continued to look at the paper instead of her.

"Well, I like candy." Claire paused in the hopes that her joke would break the tension. He didn't laugh. "I hope to get some Ministry experience, but I haven't been given the opportunity yet. I am eager to learn more about how the Ministry works and I'm a very hard worker so I anticipate that I could pick things up quickly."

"What about the Department of International Magical Cooperation interests you?" He flipped the paper over to look at the other side, "With your N.E.W.T scores you could easily apply to become an Auror."

"Well-" Claire felt a tightness in her throat, "I would love the ability to make a difference on a large scale. Working with other wizarding communities to come to agreements that help create a safer world for all wizard-kind is something that appeals to me."

This was the third interview she had been on this week. Every one had been nerve-racking. Although she had always excelled in school, finding employment had been much harder than she expected. She hated to admit it, but the war wasn't helping. Her heritage wasn't helping.

"You could potentially need to travel for this position," The man said glancing at her, "Do you have any problems with that? Any family ties to London that would make you hesitant to the travel commitments for this job?"

"No," Claire said.

"Tell me about your family."

"I-" Claire hesitated, she considered fabricating a story but then ultimately decided against it, "My mother and father are Muggles. They live southwest of London. I haven't seen them in a while… I thought it would be safer if I visited less often."

The man cleared his throat and gathered up the papers on his desk.

"I think I've asked all that I would like," He said quickly, "If you don't have any questions about the position, I will send you an owl with my decision by the end of next week."

"Great…" Claire stood and reached out her hand to shake his. He hesitated and then shook her hand briefly. "It was very nice to meet you."

"Have a nice day Miss Ludgrove." He ushered her out of his office and into the large echoing hallway of the Ministry. The door shut behind her almost immediately. She sighed and sat down on a bench and placed her head in her hands.

"Claire!" She looked up when she heard Sirius' voice booming down the hallway toward her. He approached quickly with a couple pumpkin pasties in his hand. He noticed her frown as he approached, "What happened?"

"Nothing," Claire said gravely, "I don't think I'm going to get it."

"What do you mean?" Sirius sat down next to her and handed over the pumpkin pastie, "You're a shoe-in for that position. Completely overqualified."

"The interview ended relatively abruptly after he asked about my family." Claire handed the food back to him, she had lost her appetite.

"You're a witch." Sirius said relatively loudly, Claire shushed him. "I don't see why it matters that your family is Muggle."

"You and I both know," Claire sighed, "It matters. In the world we are currently living in, it matters. This war has taken a toll on many people; they're afraid. Employing someone with my background could draw unnecessary attention to people who could otherwise be safe."

"That's ridiculous." Sirius said shaking his head, "I'm sure that you're being overly worried. I bet by the end of the week you will have an offer by owl."

Claire smiled at his optimism. She didn't have the heart to tell him the small things she noticed during the interview. The lack of eye contact, the moment of hesitation at shaking her hand, the way the door snapped shut behind her once she stepped over the threshold to the hallway. The anti-Muggle pamphlet she noticed on the corner of his desk.

Sirius would figure it out; he would know that she was keeping something from him. He glanced at her and she felt tears begin to well up in her eyes.

"Why are you doing this to yourself?" Sirius stood and pulled her up from the bench, he placed his hands firmly on her shoulders, "James and I both have enough money that you don't need to look for employment until this war is over. I, personally, would be more than happy for the Black fortune to be spent on you. It would displease my family if they ever found out, so naturally I am enthusiastic about it."

"Stop, Sirius." Claire turned and began to walk toward the Atrium, "We have had this conversation so many times that I have lost count."

"We have had the conversation multiple times because you're incredibly stubborn." Sirius said taking easy long steps to catch up to her.

"As are you." Claire retorted.

"Look," Sirius stepped in front of her to bring her to a halt, "I know that it's difficult to admit when you need help."

"Stop it." Claire said stepping around him, "I don't need your pity."

"I don't pity you!" Sirius said grabbing her by the arm and looking around to make sure no one was listening. A consistent string of people moved around them in the Atrium, heading to meetings or leaving for the day, "I'm just trying to understand… I'm offering a way to keep you safe. You are already risking a great deal for the Order, you don't need to continue to draw more attention to yourself at the Ministry just to earn enough money to pay for rent and groceries."

"I don't want money," Claire pulled her arm away from him, "I just want to be a witch. I went to school for 7 years, I got my wand at Ollivander's, I studied for all of my exams. Magic flows through my veins…"

Sirius looked at her as she ran her fingers through her long wavy hair out of frustration.

"I don't want to live every day wondering if I'm going to be captured and tortured," Claire took a shaky breath, "Just because of who my parents are. I don't want to be a risk to you or James or Remus or Peter. I just want to be able to be a witch."

They stood there in silence, watching as the rest of the individuals at the Ministry continued on their merry way. Claire pulled her wand out and reached for Sirius' hand. With thin lips and sad eyes, Sirius accepted her hand and gave it a squeeze. With a pop, both of them disappeared into thin air.

* * *

"Where in the world are you going?" James yelled over his shoulder at Claire, "The school is this way."

Claire was out of breath as she ran back toward the Hogwarts Express. She needed to make it back before the train left the station to head back to London. Her book was sitting in the compartment, she just knew it. As soon as she got her first look of Hogwarts she had been in complete awe. To say that it was magnificent would have been an understatement. The school was everything that she hoped it would be and more. Unfortunately, in her excitement she placed _Jane Eyre_ down next to her and then completely forgot about it until after she left the train with Sirius and James.

"I forgot my book, I will meet you ahead!" She yelled back toward him.

"You're going to be late for sorting!" Sirius retorted, "The book can't be that important. I will make James buy you a new one… come on!"

"Just a minute!" Claire climbed into the train and ran full speed toward the compartment she had been sitting in. Then… BAM! She knocked over a student who had stepped out of the doorway suddenly.

The impact threw Claire off her balance and she stumbled backward and landed on the floor of the train. She groaned and slowly propped herself up on her elbows to get a good look at the person she had collided with. A tall, slightly lanky, boy with light brown hair and green eyes rolled over onto his side and started to stand up.

"I'm so sorry," Claire apologized, "I was in a rush, I didn't see you. It's completely my fault."

"It's alright." The boy got to his feet and smoothed out his robes. He offered her his hand to help her up, she took it. "I was heading to the boats, but I noticed this book sitting in this compartment and I picked it up to hopefully get it back to it's owner."

"It's mine," Claire blushed, "I realized that I had forgotten it about halfway to the castle."

"Well, here you go." The boy handed the book over to her giving her a small smile. Claire grasped the book and began to walk back toward the castle, he kept pace with her. "I'm Remus Lupin, by the way."

"Claire Ludgrove."

Claire took another moment to get a good look at the boy she had run into. Remus had wise eyes, the kind of eyes that Claire imagined adults who lived well into their elderly years had. His robes did not brush the ground like Claire's did, they were about an inch too short for him. He gripped his wand in his left hand and Claire noticed some large scars stretching from the back of his hands up toward his forearms. Remus picked up on her glance and put his hands in the pockets of his robes.

"You know," Remus stated kindly, " _Jane Eyre_ won't help you with any of your Transfiguration homework."

"It's my favorite book." Claire avoided eye contact with him. She felt awful being caught ogling at his scars. "My father really only allowed the classics in our house."

"My mother likes the Brontë sisters." Remus allowed Claire to walk in front of him to disembark the train, "However she is more partial to Emily than Charlotte."

"It sounds as if your mother and I would have a great deal to talk about." Claire looked around the platform to see if she noticed Sirius and James anywhere. There was a mass of young students in their uniforms up ahead, but the sea of black robes made it difficult to distinguish anyone in particular.

"Looking for someone?" Remus asked.

"Yes," Claire said while lifting herself up onto her toes to get a better look, "There were two boys I was sitting with on the train. I had hoped they would wait for me here."

"I'll walk with you until you find them."

"That's very kind of you." Claire gave him a small smile. She glanced at him again and then looked away quickly so as to not stare.

They walked together in silence for a few moments. Claire scanned the crowd of students to see if she spotted Sirius. The crowd was chaotic, there were students moving in every direction possible. A variety of voices created a constant hum of noise that was broken up by occasional sounds of owls hooting or cats meowing.

"I was in an accident when I was young," Remus said suddenly, "That's what the scars are from."

"I didn't mean to stare, I promise." Claire apologized.

"It's alright." Remus chuckled slightly. "I just figured I should clear the air. You were making a pretty active effort to not look at me."

Claire blushed, she looked over at him and gave him a small smile. He smiled back at her and shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. A cool breeze whipped through the crowd and Claire needed to place her hands into the warm pockets of her robes. A few strands of her long wavy hair fell in front of her face in the breeze. She noticed a large man with a bushy beard standing at the end of the platform.

"Firs' years!" He bellowed over the crowd. "Head this way!"

Claire took a deep breath, this was it. This was her last opportunity to go back home. As soon as she stepped off of this platform she would be a student at a school of witchcraft and wizardry. Her heart rate increased as she reached the end of the platform. Remus stepped down and onto the dirt path ahead of him. Claire hesitated and then halted.

"Alright there?" Remus turned around and asked.

"No- yes." Claire stood at the edge of the platform, nervous about taking the next step, "This is the furthest I've been from home. I've never been away from my parents like this before."

"Me too." Remus offered his hand to her, "It's going to be fine, trust me."

* * *

Claire placed her hand in his and stepped off of the platform and toward the castle.

"There you are!" Sirius barked over the crowd as he pushed his way through over toward where Claire and Remus were. "I didn't think we would be able to find you until after the sorting."

"Get your book, then?" James asked as he approached.

"Yes," Claire said happily.

She caught James and Sirius up on what happened on the train, nearly running Remus over in her haste, the chaos of the platform, not being able to find them. Sirius and James explained that they had waited for a few moments before heading down the platform with the rest of the first year students.

Standing next to James and Sirius was a boy with a long nose and small watery eyes, Peter. They had bumped into him while looking around for Claire in the crowd of students. The five first years talked contentedly while walking down a winding path toward the lake. Remus made fast friends with Sirius and James and Claire asked Peter some questions about the courses offered at Hogwarts.

The trees that had surrounded them on their walk suddenly stopped and Claire was able to look up at the night sky. The dark canvas was spattered with a variety of sparkling stars and the half moon shone proudly on them illuminating the ground and bouncing off of the smooth black lake. Claire's mouth hung open in awe as she stared at the beautiful castle once again. Remus stopped in front of her and she bumped into him.

"I'm so sorry!" Claire blurted out, "I wasn't paying attention."

"You're just determined to knock me over today, aren't you?" Remus smirked. Claire blushed and muttered an apology again.

"Four to a boat!" The voice of the large man carried over the crowd of hushed students. His large frame and gruff voice was enough to silence even the most excited first year student.

"I guess that means we have to split up." James said looking around at the group, "There are five of us."

"I can go in a different boat." Remus offered.

"No," Claire touched his forearm gently, "How about I go with you? You, Sirius, and Peter can get in a boat together and we can meet you at the other side."

James nodded and they quietly separated to make the journey across the lake and into the castle for the first time.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Remus stood silently next to Claire in the Great Hall of Hogwarts. He felt rather fortunate that their last names were so close alphabetically, it meant that they got to stand next to each other during the sorting ceremony. Although she had run into him, not once but twice this evening, Remus really enjoyed her presence. She seemed to genuinely believe that it was a childhood accident and not a continuing malady that caused his unusual scarring. Although he was nervous about her asking more questions, she seemed content to talk quietly on the boat about other topics.

Remus had spent so much of his childhood feeling isolated. Once he had grown old enough to realize how dangerous he was, he stopped asking to attend school or go to the park with the children down the street. He couldn't remember the last time he had a conversation with someone that wasn't a healer or his parents, someone his age. On the train ride to Hogwarts, Remus had been in a compartment by himself. With every passing moment, he had wondered if he would continue to feel as lonely at Hogwarts as he did at home.

Then he collided with Claire and suddenly everything felt different. She introduced him to James, Sirius, and Peter. Quickly, and for the first time since he had become a werewolf, Remus had friends. He felt eternally grateful that Claire forgot her book on the train.

Claire bounced on the balls of her feet nervously in front of him. Remus tapped her shoulder to get her attention.

"There's nothing to be nervous about." He assured her in a whisper.

"What if I'm sorted into the wrong house?" Claire turned to look at him, "What if I don't get on with anyone in the house? What if this is all a big mistake and I'm not supposed to be here at all?"

Remus related deeply to her last concern. He had wondered in the weeks leading up to the school year starting if Dumbledore had been wrong. Maybe it was a bad idea for him to attend Hogwarts. The headmaster had seemed so sure of himself that everything would work out, but he had never been around when Remus went through his transformation. What if this all turned out to be a huge mistake that put his family at risk?

He pushed those doubts down and looked Claire in the eye.

"It's not a mistake," Remus said confidently, "You and I are both supposed to be here. Any house would be lucky to have you."

Claire gave him a thankful smile and turned back around to face the front of the Great Hall just as the sorting hat announced that "Lesage, Michael" had been placed in Ravenclaw.

"Ludgrove, Claire." The thin angular witch with square glasses said clearly over the line of first year students. Claire reached behind her and gave Remus' hand a small squeeze before drifting up the stairs and sitting squarely on the three-legged wooden stool.

Remus watched as the hat enveloped Claire's head and covered her eyes. He scanned the Great Hall and spotted Sirius who had already been sorted into Gryffindor. He flashed a smile at Remus and raised his hands to show he had crossed his pointer and middle fingers. The sea of Hogwarts students sat in silence and waited. Remus began to get nervous, this was taking much longer than it did with the previous students. A small hum of voices began to creep over the Great Hall the longer they waited. Suddenly, the seam of the old hat opened to speak.

"GRYFFINDOR!" A roar of approval came from the long table that Sirius was sitting at. Remus could hear him loudly whistle and clap for Claire.

She looked at Remus and with a small proud smile made her way over to Sirius and sat down next to him. Remus watched as Sirius whispered something into Claire's ear and she laughed heartily.

"Lupin, Remus."

Remus took a breath and then nervously walked up the stairs to the Sorting Hat. He promptly sat on the stool and watched the Great Hall fade from his view and total darkness take it's place.

"Let's see what we have here…" Remus heard the raspy voice say, he looked around to see if he could locate where it was coming from. He quickly realized it was the Sorting Hat that was talking to him.

"Plenty of intelligence." The hat continued to talk, "Definitely a desire to prove yourself to others... "

Remus found himself hoping that he would be placed in Gryffindor with Claire. He had never felt a preference toward one house before, but now knowing that he could be separated from potential friends he found Gryffindor to be extremely appealing.

"Ah, you wish to be placed in Gryffindor. You do possess a great deal of bravery. You live in fear of others finding out what you are, but still you are here." Remus felt some panic spread through him knowing the hat was now privy to his deepest secret, "You could be a great Ravenclaw, but if you would be happiest with your friends we should place you in GRYFFINDOR!"

The hat was lifted off of Remus' head and he could see the table of students at the far left side of the Great Hall cheering for him. Claire was standing up and joining in with the rest of the Gryffindors. When he made eye contact with her, she waved him over to their table. Remus stood and made his way over to the Gryffindor table while Professor McGonagall called the next student to the Sorting Hat.

Remus sat down next to Claire and felt a sigh of relief leave his body.

"Welcome to Gryffindor," Claire said kindly, "We are lucky to have you Remus Lupin."

* * *

Claire made her way through the winding hallways of Hogwarts in the middle of a group of first year students who were heading to the Gryffindor Common Room for the first time. She had gotten really lucky; Remus, Sirius, James, and Peter had all been sorted in Gryffindor. Although she could have been happy in any house, she was relieved that she would be in classes with people she already knew and liked.

Sirius walked next to her pointing out the individuals moving in the portraits hung on the walls. One of the paintings waved at her, she waved back excitedly. It seemed that every inch of the castle was filled with something fascinating that she wanted to have time to investigate. She made a mental note of everything that she would need to explore later in the week.

"Once we get back to the Common Room," James said rapidly traversing the stairs by taking two steps at at time, "We should get a good spot by the fire and play some rounds of Exploding Snap."

"Shouldn't we unpack?" Claire asked.

"That can wait." Sirius said picking up his pace to keep up with James. Remus looked over at Claire and shrugged.

The group of first year students came to a slow stop behind the prefect who had been leading them to the Gryffindor Common Room. The tall boy with dark eyes and black hair turned to them to make sure he had their attention.

"In order to get into the Common Room," He said projecting his voice over the group, "You need to know the password. Make sure you commit it to memory or else you will be stuck out in the hallway all night."

The first year students stood there in silence hanging on his every word. Sirius pressed his back up against the stone wall and looked around the hallway. Claire made eye contact with him and he smirked. In front of the prefect was a mural that took up the majority of the wall, in it was a large woman dressed in a light pink dress. She was looking in a mirror at herself and fixing her hair.

"Flying Cauldron." The lady looked at the prefect and continued to fix her hair. "...Flying Cauldron. Flying. Cauldron." The prefect was beginning to sound irritated.

"Just a moment." The lady said in a sing-song voice. The prefect tapped his foot impatiently. "Oh, alright…"

The portrait swung slightly open and revealed a passageway behind it. Students began to climb through the portrait hole and into the Common Room. Before heading through the entrance Claire stepped to the side and looked at the woman in the painting.

"Your hair looks lovely, by the way."

"Oh, why thank you!" She exclaimed and then gave the prefect a stern look, "Great beauty requires patience."

"Have a nice evening." Remus tugged on Claire's sleeve and she began to walk toward the Common Room.

"You too, my dear!" The Fat Lady said jovially, "I am very fond of that girl."

Claire walked through the portrait hole and caught a glimpse of the cozy room ahead of her. There were large tufted burgundy couches with oversized yellow pillows on them, ornate area rugs on the floor, and the room was lit by a roaring fire. The older students had already gathered in the space, catching up with old friends and lounging comfortably around on the furniture.

"I'm going to go claim the best bed!" Sirius shouted as he rushed up the stairs to the boys dormitory. James rushed off after him and following many steps behind was Peter.

"I suppose I will end up with the worst bed." Remus looked at her and sighed.

"From the look of the Common Room," Claire motioned around her, "I don't think there will be a bad bed. If there is, I'm sure you'd be comfortable sleeping out here."

"Want to unpack?" A student walked in between them while they were speaking and headed up the stairs toward the girls dormitory, "Then I could teach you how to play Exploding Snap. It's rather simple."

"Sure." Claire said smiling, "I will meet you back down here in a few moments."

She turned toward the stairway and took tired steps to the girls dormitory. It was just hitting her in this moment how long of a day it had been. Although this would be her first night away from her parents, she had no doubt that she would easily fall asleep once she climbed into bed. Claire reached the top of the stairs and took a right toward the room where the first year female students would be sleeping. The door was open slightly, so she pushed it gently with the palm of her hand and stepped into the room.

The dormitory was completely circular, four beds were placed equal distances apart from each other around the circumference of the room. The beds were surrounded with large red curtains that could be shifted to create privacy and keep out the cold. Next to each bed was a small chest of drawers to keep clothing in and centered in the room was a small wood burning stove with an exhaust heading up through the vaulted ceilings.

Claire noticed some movement out of the corner of her eye and saw the red-headed girl from the train unpacking her things at the bed to the right of the door. She turned around when the door squeaked open and glanced at Claire skeptically.

"Hello," Claire said as she walked over toward her, "I suppose we will be sharing a room. I'm Claire Ludgrove."

"Lily Evans." She continued to fold her clothes and put them away.

Claire stood there in an awkward silence for a couple moments while Lily continued to put her clothing away. It was clear what had happened on the train earlier had left a negative first impression of Claire and her friends. Claire didn't feel right starting the school year off on the wrong foot and decided she needed to say something.

"I'm sorry about what happened on the train today," Claire sat at the edge of Lily's bed. "I'm sure that James and Sirius didn't mean to offend you or your friend. I'm sure it was just a big misunderstanding."

"It wasn't necessary to mock his desire to be in Slytherin." Lily said cooly.

"Again, I'm sorry." Claire said as genuinely as she could muster.

"It's alright." Lily said giving a small smile, "Which bed are you thinking 'bout taking?"

"Do you mind if I take the one next to you?" Claire pointed to the bed over to the left of Lily.

"Go ahead."

Claire walked over to the bed and began to unpack her belongings from her trunk. She wasn't sure how her trunk had gotten up in the dormitory, but she was extremely happy that she hadn't needed to pull it through the hallways herself. She took large handfuls of her clothes and tossed them on her bed, then she re-folded them and placed them in the chest of drawers. Claire put her textbooks, cauldron, and other supplies on top of the chest of drawers and then used her body weight to slide her trunk to the foot of the bed.

Claire heard raucous laughter from down in the Common Room through the cracked door. Two other girls walked through the door and giggled on their way.

"You both missed it," The first girl said between her laughter, "One of the first year boys tried to come up the stairs to the girls dormitory."

"He ended up falling face-first when the stairs turned into a slide." The second girl chuckled as she drug her trunk over toward the bed she was claiming. Claire could hear more laughter drifting up the stairs.

"I'm going to head down," Claire said pulling her long hair back into a ponytail and tying it with a ribbon that she had found while unpacking. "Do you want to come with me?"

"I actually think I'm going to head to bed early," Lily said while pulling out a pair of pajamas, "Thanks for the offer though."

Claire made her way out of the door and toward the top of the stairs. Her two roommates had been right, the stairs had indeed turned into a slide. At the bottom of it was Sirius who was giving his best effort at running up the slide. As Claire reached the landing, Sirius fell over and slid back down toward the Common Room.

"There you are!" James shouted while lounged on one of the large couches, "Sirius went to look for you, clearly it's going very well."

"I give up!" Sirius lay on the floor, "Toss me a licorice wand, mate."

James threw one in Sirius' direction and it hit him squarely in the chest. Claire stepped onto the slide and tried her best to keep her balance on the way down. As she reached the Common Room she lost her balance slightly and toppled over and landed near Sirius.

"You could have stuck the landing better." Sirius remarked. Claire reached up behind her and pulled a pillow from under James' feet. She wound up and then hit Sirius' squarely in the face with it while laughing.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

"Today we will be severing and mending," Professor Flitwick's squeaky voice carried over the group of students. Claire sat up straight in her seat to get a good look at his demonstration. She had been up much later than she should have been practicing these complementary spells before they began this lesson today. Sirius and James had said it was overkill to learn spells before they were taught, but Claire loved Charms the most out of all of her classes.

"You want to slowly rotate your wand while you move it from point A…" He trailed off while he demonstrated the movement, "... to point B."

Claire turned her gaze down to her parchment and began taking intricate notes about what she had observed. Sirius elbowed her and she gave him a frustrated look.

"Are you writing a novel over there?" Claire shook her head at him while continuing to write, "It's just a simple charm, you can't possibly have that much to write about."

"Something to add to the lesson Mr. Black?" Flitwick stopped demonstrating to look over at him. Peter let out a small laugh and James elbowed him in the ribs.

"No, Professor," Sirius said nonchalantly.

"Care to demonstrate?" Flitwick placed a piece of simple red fabric on Sirius' desk. James smirked over at Sirius while he rolled up the sleeves to his robes.

"Diffindo." The fabric severed in half and Sirius smiled proudly around the classroom of Gryffindor students.

"A good first try, Mr. Black." Flitwick picked up the fabric and examined it between his small fingers, "If you hadn't insisted on talking to Miss Ludgrove and paid more attention to the wand movement, you may have gotten a clean cut instead of a frayed one."

Sirius narrowed his eyes slightly and took a closer look at the fabric and saw fraying along the line that it had been cut. Claire had a content smile on her face as she continued to take notes. Sirius was a good wizard, she had to give him credit for that. However, he was far too interested in having fun to apply himself to be the great wizard he had the potential to be. The fact that he was relatively gifted meant he got away with a lot more misbehavior than he should have. James exactly the same. Flitwick was the least tolerant of their mischievous behavior.

"Well," Sirius said shrugging and chuckling slightly, "Good thing I'm not planning on becoming a tailor then."

A collective giggle spread around the room, but Claire sat in silence looking at a slightly irritated Professor Flitwick.

"Would you like to give it a go, Miss Ludgrove?" Flitwick placed the severed fabric on top of her parchment and gave her an encouraging smile.

"Reparo." Claire clearly stated the spell and moved her wand in the opposite manner that Flitwick had demonstrated and added a small flick at the end. The fabric lifted and slowly fused back together. Flitwick nodded at her and she took a breath. "Diffindo."

Quickly, as if there was an invisible knife, the fabric was sliced cleanly down the middle. Flitwick lifted it and held it between his fingers for the entire class to see the two perfectly even pieces.

"Well done." Sirius glared over at Claire who was beaming with pride, "Ten points to Gryffindor for impeccable magic. Another ten points if you can tell me the importance of learning to master the severing charm."

"If used improperly," Claire said while referring to the notes she had taken the night before, "You can cause death or injury."

"Twenty total points it is, then. Even the simplest of tailoring charms," Flitwick said pointedly with a flick of his wand to disseminate squares of fabric to every student in the classroom, "Can be dangerous if done in haste or with improper form. It's best to take it seriously."

Claire levitated her piece of fabric in front of her with ease and focused her attention at the center of it, picturing an invisible line where she would cut it. As she lifted her wand to start the spell, Sirius interrupted her.

"I thought James was the show off in our flying lessons," Sirius said while he lazily levitated his piece of fabric, "But then I endured Charms class with you and I realized it could be much worse."

"Is this how you do it?" Peter said sounding unsure of himself. He completed his spell and the fabric fell in front of him with a wobbly cut through it.

"Don't forget to rotate your wand, Peter. Also, I'm not showing off." Claire turned toward Sirius and said in a hurt tone. Her parents had always raised her to be modest, she had never been accused of showboating before. "I study really hard. I put in a lot of work before class so I can do it right."

"You're clearly Flitwick's favorite," James said while spinning his fabric in circles with his wand, "You could show up without studying and he'd still praise you."

"Ten points for being present!" Sirius said doing his best Flitwick impression and flourishing his wand around. James laughed and attempted to cut the fabric in half. Peter's fabric was flopping around on his desk, not mending itself back together. Flitwick was busy congratulating Lily on a spell well completed.

"Just because you're okay not caring," Claire spat at Sirius while cutting her fabric into three pieces and then rearranging them to create a new pattern before mending it, "Doesn't mean I have to be."

"What a goody two-shoes," Sirius muttered while rolling his eyes. Claire glared at him.

* * *

Sirius pushed his way through the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom door and breathed in the fresh cool air of the Hogwarts corridor. Although Defense was his favorite class, it was always exciting when the professor dismissed the students and they had a few minutes of freedom before their next class began. James walked beside him, running his hands through the back of his hair which caused it to stand up on its ends. Peter brought up the caboose, as he always did, his robes haphazardly hanging off of his shoulders and parchment falling out of his textbooks.

"Ten minutes to double Potions." James groaned throwing his bag filled with books over his shoulder, "What do you want to do until then?"

"Ten minutes is just enough time to make it to the dungeons and get seated," Claire chimed in pushing her way through the throng of students to keep up with them, "There isn't much time for more than that."

"If he had suggested we go to the Library," Sirius scoffed at her, "I'm sure you wouldn't have any objections to that."

"The Library is on the complete opposite side of the castle-"

"I wish you'd lighten up," James said picking up his pace. Sirius continued to walk and scanned the corridor for anything that peaked his interest.

"If you're not careful, Ludgrove," Sirius said slyly, "You're going to go this whole academic year and not even attempt to have any fun."

"I have loads of fun!" Claire objected while rearranging the books in her arms to get a better hold on them, she also picked up some papers that Peter had dropped and handed them to him, "I've spent plenty of evenings playing Exploding Snap and Wizard's Chess with both of you."

"Not on a weeknight."

They had reached a crossroads on their path. To their left was the stairs heading down to the dungeons and straight ahead was a corridor that led toward the kitchens. James and Sirius stopped and took in their surroundings to make a decision about which direction they would head. Sirius almost wished they had lost Claire in the crowd of students before.

On the weekend, spending time with Claire was great. She had a good sense of humor and she fit in nicely with their group. However, during the week she was almost unbearable to be around. She spent most of her time doing homework, reminding Sirius that he should do his homework, telling James he was doing the wrong homework assignment, letting them know they shouldn't be wandering around the halls past curfew, chiding them for stealing food from the Great Hall. Quite honestly, it was a miracle that he hadn't stunned her into oblivion yet.

The only thing that made it easier was Remus. With Remus around, she had someone to study with and talk to about spellwork. He seemed to function as a buffer for her most annoying characteristics, leaving James and Sirius unscathed for the school week and able to enjoy her presence on the weekends. Unfortunately, Remus was out of school the rest of this week. Something about a family member being sick and having to spend a few days at home. Why did he have to be gone this week? She was driving him absolutely bonkers.

"I don't see why it matters what days I choose to have fun." Claire huffed at him with a stern look on her face.

"Of course you don't," James said. Sirius looked down the stairs toward the dungeons and noticed a flash of auburn hair and some greasy black hair next to it.

Snape. Sirius locked eyes with James and then tilted his head in the direction of the stairs. James looked down the stairwell and got a mischievous smile on his face. They both turned simultaneously and started down the stairs toward the dungeons. Peter scurried along behind them, leaving Claire alone at the top of the landing.

"Oi, Snivellus," James yelled as he walked down the stairs, "Heading off to the dungeons, I see. Giving your family a quick visit before class?"

Snape turned around and glared at James while Lily tugged on the sleeve on his robe to encourage him to continue walking. Sirius smirked at James and picked up his pace to get closer to Snape.

"It's funny running into you like this Snivellus," Sirius walked directly behind him and quickly started balling up small pieces of parchment to throw at his head, "I was just thinking about you before."

"Why's that Sirius?" James joined in with tossing parchment. Snape was actively ignoring them at this point. Lily glanced over her shoulder to glare at them.

"While in Defense Against the Dark Arts," Sirius hit Severus directly in the back of the head with a large wad of parchment, "Someone brought up Dementors, and I realized if I ever met one I'd have to relive each time I have a Potions class with you."

"Leave him be." Lily spat at them as they reached the classroom door.

"Well now I know why he wasn't sorted into Gryffindor," James chuckled, "He can't even stand up for himself, he has to have Evans do it for him."

Snape gritted his teeth and stared at the ground while Lily stood next to him waiting for the door to the classroom to open.

"You must be right James," Sirius stood directly in front of Severus and threw one last crumpled piece of parchment at him, hitting him directly in between the eyes, "He's not smart enough for Ravenclaw, definitely not brave enough for Gryffindor… Hell, I don't even think Hufflepuff would want him. He got stuck in Slytherin where he gets to hide underground like the rat that he is."

"Stop it." Sirius turned and saw Claire standing at the bottom of the stairs.

"Oh piss off, Ludgrove." Sirius barked at her, "No one asked for your input."

"He didn't do anything to you." Sirius began to twirl his wand between his fingers and glanced at James who rolled his eyes. Peter stood quietly leaning up against the wall.

"He exists."

"You've been encouraging us to study more," James messed with his hair while speaking, "I'd really like to test out that instant scalping hex we read about. What do you think, Sirius?"

"We'd honestly be doing him a favor," Sirius said pointing his wand at Snape, "Getting rid of that greasy mop he calls hair."

Snape dropped his books and pulled his wand from his robes and pointed it squarely at Sirius' chest. James quickly stood next to Sirius and drew his wand.

"Go ahead, hex me," Snape growled gripping his wand tightly.

"Abiit capillium!" Sirius shouted and began to give a flick with his wand.

"Expelliarmus!" Wands flew from the hands of Sirius and James and clattered on the ground. Claire stood with her wand clutched in her hand. Sirius would have been impressed by her ability to disarm them both if he wasn't so irritated at her incessant need to interfere.

"What in the world is going on out here?" Slughorn opened the door to the dungeon partially out of breath. Sirius could only assume that he heard the commotion and came running across the classroom to see what had happened. Sirius and James picked up their wands and shot an angry look over at Claire. "Miss Ludgrove, were you doing magic in the hallway?"

"Yes, sir." Claire looked down at the ground in shame.

"You know that students are not to do magic in the hallways," Slughorn reprimanded her and glanced around at the rest of the students, "Ten points from Gryffindor. Now, I expect you all to behave for the next couple of minutes while I finish setting up for today's lesson. Not a peep out of any of you. Understood? And clean this mess up… there is parchment everywhere"

He locked eyes with each of them and then slowly closed the door leaving it open a crack just to keep an eye on things.

"I didn't ask for your help!" Snape said angrily at Claire. Claire bent down to begin picking up the parchment on the floor.

"You didn't ask for it," Claire said quietly while tucking the last piece of parchment into the pocket of her robes, "You certainly needed it."

"Meddlesome shrew," Snape muttered.

"Don't you talk to her like that," Sirius glared at him, "She just rescued you from certain humiliation, you should be thanking her for even considering sparing you."

"I want to make one thing clear, Snivellus," James said in a low voice approaching him slowly, "I don't like you and I can guarantee you that Claire isn't always going to be here to save you. Watch your back."

Slughorn opened the classroom door and Snape turned on his heel to head through the doorway and sit at his desk. Lily glared at Sirius and James before heading after him. Peter took the awkward moment to head into the classroom, rushing through the door to claim their usual desks.

"You two are quite the bullies, you know that?" Claire glared at them. She pushed past them and into the classroom.

Ugh. Why in the hell did Remus have to be gone today of all days? And how many seconds until he came back?


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

They had begun to call the dilapidated old building the Shrieking Shack. It had previously been abandoned and wasn't particularly noteworthy, but when Remus started his first year at Hogwarts the old building had become the talk of the town. Rumors moved quickly throughout Hogsmeade to explain the odd noises that could be heard if you dared to get close enough to the shack.

People began to weave intricate stories of a family who had lived there previously who had been killed by a wizard with a vendetta, or was it a woman who had been locked away by her husband and while in her confinement went mad and offed herself? Maybe it was both? Either way, everyone in town was certain that the building was haunted. What else could possibly explain the eerie noises that were heard in the evenings?

Remus knew the shack was neither haunted nor was there any ghostly shrieking to be heard. The ghost that people believed resided in the building was actually him when he was in his most dangerous form. The noises that were heard were the screaming and yelping that occurred when his frustrated monstrous-self realized that there was no one innocent to attack. Only then would he claw, bite, and maul himself until the full moon passed and he could transform back into the person that he knew and liked.

The floor was cold and creaked under his body as he sat there exhausted. The sun had barely risen and his body finished returning to the shape of a twelve-year-old boy. He took shaky breaths and looked around his bloody form to triage his wounds. There would be a variety of new scars that he would have to actively hide with his Hogwarts uniform and robes, some of them would be difficult to cover and others would be much easier.

Remus winced when he moved in an attempt to grab the potions that Madam Pomfrey had given him. When they had left the castle last night, she handed over a parcel full of items to help him make it through until she could come check on him. He surveyed the items she had included: some clean bandages, a blanket, a couple of pillows, a clean uniform, some Murtlap Essence, one Wound-cleaning potion, and a Sleeping Draught. On top of the pile of items was a couple of Chocolate Frog boxes. Even though it pained him to do so he gave a small smile.

Madam Pomfrey was uncommonly kind to him given the circumstances. She was the only individual at Hogwarts other than Dumbledore who knew about his lycanthropy, and she really did the best she could to care for him from a distance. She was the most gifted Healer that he had ever had the fortune of meeting. He appreciated her help greatly and knew that she would be able to manage much more with some healing spells tomorrow then, he would use the items as she had taught him and try to get some sleep.

Remus unstoppered the Wound-cleaning Potion first and braced himself for the agony that would come when he poured it over his wounds. He always started with the least comfortable potion and ended with the most enjoyable one. The potion hissed and stung as he carefully applied it to all of his wounds. When he was finished he took a large exhale, just realizing that he had been holding his breath while administering it. Next, he applied Essence of Murtlap although generally, it helped wounds heal he knew that given the nature of his injuries they never fully would. He pulled the pillows onto the ground next to him and placed the blanket over his body to prepare for some much-needed rest.

Remus wondered how long he could keep this up before someone inevitably found out his secret. He had been incredibly careful, making sure to provide his friends with stories about his mother being ill early in his first year before his first transformation. Ditching his friends proved more challenging than he had anticipated it to be, Claire was particularly difficult to get enough distance from to sneak off to the Hospital Wing to meet with Madam Pomfrey monthly.

He had been lucky up until this point, but he felt as though he couldn't sneak by on luck for much longer. Someone would see him in the Hospital Wing or walking with Madam Pomfrey to the Whomping Willow. Someone would figure out that he was absent from classes every month around the full moon. When they figured it out, would he be asked to leave?

Being a student at Hogwarts had been everything he had wished for since he was a child. The thought of being asked to leave was even more painful than the idea of never being able to attend in the first place. Somehow it was worse to be able to experience something and have it taken from you than never getting to do it at all. If he was kicked out, would his friends still want to be around him? Would they be terrified? Would their parents forbid them from spending time with him any longer?

Remus rolled onto his side and removed the top from the Sleeping Draught and took a large swig. There was no use worrying about it now. What was done is done. A werewolf was a second-year student at Hogwarts. He would just enjoy being a student for as long as Hogwarts would have him. For now, he would get some much-needed sleep and return to class as soon as he could.

* * *

"Here are the notes from the classes you missed." Claire pushed the parchment over the table toward a tattered looking Remus. This was the second time this term that he had missed a couple days of classes to go home. He had borrowed Claire's notes many times last year as well, all to visit his mother who Claire knew to be ill. Whenever he came back to Hogwarts, he didn't seem himself for the new few days.

"Thanks," He said quietly and sifted through the notes for Transfiguration and Charms first, pushing the notes for History of Magic and Potions to the side.

"...How is your mother?" Claire was worried about him. Although she had spent significantly less time praying nowadays than she had a few years ago, she had found herself praying nightly for Remus and his family. It was clear to her that something was deeply wrong, she just couldn't shake the feeling that she was missing some key detail.

"She seemed better when I left," Remus didn't look up from the notes when he spoke to her. Claire noticed a new deep red gash on his left hand as he held the notes up to examine them.

"Can I ask what is wrong?" Claire asked cautiously. She didn't want to pry but felt that she might be more helpful if she could just have a better understanding of what was happening.

"She just had a case of the Dragon Pox," Remus said glancing over at her briefly before taking a quill to parchment and starting to create his own notes.

"Isn't that what she had last month?"

"No, last month was Mumblemumps."

"Aren't those both wizard ailments?" Claire asked genuinely, trying to get him to look up and make eye contact with her. She had a nagging feeling that he was keeping something from her. Was his mother much iller than he was letting on?

"Yes," Remus looked at her confused.

"Isn't your mother a Muggle?" Claire hadn't lived in the wizarding world for that long, she was sure there were many things she didn't know. However, she thought she had read somewhere that Muggles and wizards had a slightly different physiology and that is what caused them to have different illnesses.

"Yes- I mean-" Remus put the notes down and looked at Claire, "I suppose being in close proximity to my father she gets exposed to more illnesses than your average Muggle. She's fine though."

"You were out of class a handful of time last year too," Remus stared at her blankly as she spoke, "Your mother has been ill an awful lot. I'm worried about you. If she's incredibly ill, I wish you'd tell me so I could do something more than just give you my notes when you come back."

"She just has bad luck," Remus shrugged.

"Remus," Claire held the notes down with the palm of her hand as he went to lift them again, "Please just tell me what's going on. I feel as if you're keeping something important from me."

"Claire," Remus finally made eye contact with her, "I promise, everything is fine. I'm going to head to the Library to get some of my Transfiguration essay done before the weekend starts. I will see you at dinner, okay?"

"Okay," Claire said quietly as he got up and walked away from the table with a slight limp in his walk. She sighed and flipped open Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them to pick up reading where she had left off, beginning the new section on werewolves.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Sirius bounded into the Common Room feeling ready to take on whatever the weekend had in store for him and James. They had finished their last class not too long ago and had taken a detour to send a leg-locking curse over in Snape's direction and watched him fall into the Black Lake. It was a great start to what was bound to be a great weekend.

"Snape is going to be washing lake water smell out of his clothes for the next week I think." James chuckled and threw himself onto the largest couch that was available. Peter had left them to head off to the library to finish some homework he had forgotten to do.

"His hair might smell of it forever," Sirius smirked. He looked around the Common Room to take inventory of the other students that were there. Remus had to be somewhere around here, maybe he would be up for a round of Exploding Snap. At this point Sirius refused to play with James, he won far too much for Sirius to be able to tolerate playing with him anymore.

Sirius spotted Remus over at a large table, Claire was sitting next to him. He assumed they were doing homework, every time they were together that is what they seemed to be doing. However, at a second glance, something seemed off with them. Instead of huddling over the same piece of parchment, Remus was sitting completely upright and Claire had her brow furrowed as her lips moved quickly and quietly.

James lifted his head from the couch to look over in their direction. He made eye contact with Sirius and raised his eyebrows as if to ask silently what was going on. Sirius shrugged and began to make his way over to them. While Sirius had experienced many an argument with Claire, he had never seen her become remotely angry with Remus. As he got closer he could finally hear Claire's voice.

"Remus, please," Claire sounded desperate, "I know something is going on, I wish you would just be honest with me."

"I've told you repeatedly Claire," Remus' voice was cold and he stood from his chair suddenly, "Nothing is wrong, I don't know why you're prying."

"Stop lying to me!" Claire stood to meet him, but being so much shorter than him, failed to intimidate. "You're my good friend, Remus. I deserve to know the truth."

"What in the hell is going on over here?" James sat on the table on top of Claire's many parchments of notes.

"Go away." She spat at him and turned back to Remus, clutching at his robes so he could not walk away.

"Has Remus finally come to his senses and realized that you are bloody annoying?" Sirius looked at him to gauge what was going on. Something about Remus seemed different, he was clearly irritated but there was a small amount of fear lingering in his gaze.

"Piss off." Claire glared at Sirius.

"See you have a really good handle on that temper of yours." Sirius slapped his hand on Remus' shoulder, "Do you need me to get her to leave you alone? You've got all weekend to catch up on your homework. No need for her to nag you on a Friday."

"It's fine," Remus shrugged.

"I'm not nagging him-"

"You clearly are, he just got back to school today. You could give him a few hours to breathe." James shifted and pulled all of the notes out from under him. "Why does he need notes from the entire school year anyway? He hasn't been absent that much."

Sirius knew that Remus had been absent a couple times this year. It was only March and he was pretty sure he could count on one hand the number of times he had missed class. Although at first he had thought it was odd, Remus had told him that his mother frequently got sick and he would head home to see her and help his father with things around the house. He wasn't sure why Claire was so fixated on it, his absences didn't seem to impact his grades at all.

"This is the sixth time he's been absent," Claire said grabbing the notes from James abruptly.

"It's none of your business how many times he's been absent." Sirius shook his head at her. She was so incredibly stubborn sometimes.

"Remus, please…" Claire's eyes pleaded with him. Sirius stopped himself from continuing to berate her, although it was incredibly unnecessary she seemed legitimately concerned for him.

"I told you," Remus spat at her, "My mother was sick. I went home to visit her-"

"Your mother has been sick six times?" Remus looked at Sirius in an exasperated manner. "That's just this year too. You went home to see her eight times last year."

"How do you-" Sirius began to ask, but Claire stopped him.

"I give him my notes every time he's gone." Claire pushed James off the table and laid out all of the notes. Each piece of parchment was dated, many of them notes from their first year at Hogwarts. Why would she keep her notes from last years spellwork? Sirius was quite sure that she was losing her mind.

"What are you suggesting?" James said now standing next to the table, "That Remus is pretending his mother is sick and he's skipping classes?"

"I hope that's true," Sirius smirked at Remus, "You should totally bring us with you next time you skip."

"No…" Claire looked at Remus, almost pleading with him before continuing, "I think Remus is the one that has the illness."

Remus snaked out from under Sirius' arm and sat down on the wooden chair that was next to the table. He placed his head in his hands in what appeared to be defeat.

"He's not sick." Sirius looked quizzically at Claire. She really was falling off her rocker.

"I date all of my notes." Claire began to move them around so they would be in order, "He has missed a class almost every month since he's been a student here at Hogwarts."

Sirius noticed Remus' leg start to subtly shake, he looked over at James who seemed much more engaged in the conversation now. Claire's voice was starting to falter as she spoke, Sirius could tell that tears were welling up in her eyes. She sifted through her papers and unfolded a piece of parchment and placed it in the center of the table.

Sirius leaned over to glance at the parchment, at first it just seemed like another set of notes but then he took a better look at it to realize it was for Astronomy class. At some point during their first year, they had worked on keeping track of the phases of the moon. Claire's impeccable handwriting had made notes for each of the full moons with the corresponding dates. James looked from the chart to the class notes and then over to Remus.

Sirius glanced at Claire and saw her lip quivering. He realized in that moment that this was not a conversation to be having in the Common Room and pulled her by her hand toward the stairs for the dormitories.

"Grab Remus." Sirius locked eyes with James and motioned over at Remus who was still holding his head in his hands, his whole body now shaking.

Sirius guided Claire by her hand up the stairs and into their room, as soon as Remus and James stepped over the threshold he quietly closed the door behind them. Sirius handed the papers back to Claire who was sitting at the foot of his bed. He was suddenly hyper aware that he hadn't cleaned up his side of the dorm in some time. Shoving his dirty socks into the top drawer of his dresser quickly, he turned to Claire who was holding tightly onto Remus' hand.

"What are you suggesting, Claire?" James said sternly. Claire looked up at him and gently let go of Remus' hand.

"The notes I lent Remus all match up with the full moon." Claire shuffled through the papers again, "Every time he has been absent I have written at the top of my parchment that I need to lend him my notes."

Sirius looked at the notes again, she was right the dates matched. It could be a coincidence.

"I didn't piece it all together until a couple months ago," Claire reached out to Remus, he pulled away from her, "I had taken Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them out of the library for my Defense essay. There was a section about werewolves… Remus…"

"Okay!" Remus yelled. He stood and paced the dormitory. "I'm a werewolf. I have been since I was a child."

As Remus continued to walk, the other three sat in silence watching him. Sirius looked at James, he knew that James was aware of the way the wizarding world viewed individuals with lycanthropy. They were outcasts; too dangerous to be integrated into society. Even the Ministry categorized them as beasts and actively worked to control their population.

"I had hoped to be able to at least get into my third year before anyone figured it out." Remus continued to pace, nervously running his fingers through his hair. Tears were staining his cheeks while he spoke. "I was so lucky that Dumbledore was willing to bring me here… but now… Now you know. When others find out, the headmaster will start to get owls from concerned parents and I will be asked to leave."

"I can't blame them," He rattled on, quickening his steps, " I'm dangerous."

"This changes nothing." James stopped Remus from pacing, holding him firmly in place. "You're our friend. You're not going anywhere."

"Agreed." Sirius slapped Remus on the back heartily, "If anything, it will be easier now because you won't be working alone at keeping this a secret."

Remus gave them a small worried smile and glanced over at Claire. She was the wildcard in the room; Sirius had no doubt in his mind that Remus being a werewolf wouldn't change the way that James, Peter or himself viewed him. Honestly, something about being part of this secret created quite a thrill for Sirius. Claire wasn't one for thrills or secrets; she was the type of person who was always in the Common Room ten minutes before curfew. Remus shuffled over to Claire who was still sitting on the bed.

"Claire?" Remus murmured and gently touched her hand.

She stood and threw her arms around him into a tight hug. Sirius let out a sigh of relief and smiled over at James.

"Your secret is safe with me." Claire finally released her tight embrace and gave Remus' hand a final squeeze.

"Are you- are you sure?" Remus looked around at all of them, "I'm a monster."

"You're only a werewolf for a few hours once every month," James responded, "That doesn't negate who you are the rest of the time."

The door to the dorm opened and in shuffled Peter with a heavy bag filled with books slung over his shoulder. He sighed and let his books fall to the floor with a thud and collapsed onto his bed. Peter scanned the room quickly, his eyes darting from James to Sirius to Claire to Remus and back again. He did a double-take and looked at Claire.

"Why is Claire in our room?"

"What do you mean?" James gave Peter a genuine look of confusion, "I don't see her."

Remus let out a laugh that filled the room and soon the rest of them joined in.

* * *

"I win!" James shouted out as he slapped the last card in the pile. Remus let out a defeated sigh. Sirius wasn't sure how James had roped him into playing a game. You could only play so much without winning before you got bored of it. "Another round?"

"No, I think I ought to head up to sleep," Remus said with a yawn.

The Common Room glowed with a warm orange light from the fire. There was a quiet that settled in the room that could only come with the early hours of the morning. Peter was sprawled out on the largest couch snoring slightly, his left leg hanging off of the cushions and barely brushing the floor. Remus and James had taken some cushions off of some of the chairs to pad the floor beneath them. Sirius lay on his stomach in front of the fire near the feet of Claire who was sitting in an armchair with a large leatherbound book in her hands.

"Sirius?" James picked up the cards and began to shuffle them.

"I told you," Sirius muttered rolling onto his back, "I won't play Exploding Snap with you anymore."

"What a sore loser," James said pointedly.

"I'm not a sore loser," Sirius stretched his arms over his head, "You're just the least gracious of any winner I've ever met."

Remus let out a chuckle and stood up, he threw the cushion he had been using back toward the couch he had pulled it from. It landed on the floor in front of it and he shrugged being too tired to care.

"Is everyone going to sleep then?" James sounded disappointed that he wouldn't get in another game.

"I think I speak for everyone when I say, yes," Sirius snorted at Remus' comment, "Wake up Peter."

James sighed and silently stood up, he shook Peter lightly until he opened his eyes. He helped him off the couch and watched as he shuffled his way up the stairs toward their dormitory. James glanced over at Sirius who was still lying on the floor.

"You coming, mate?"

"I will be there in a minute."

Sirius watched as James climbed the stairs and quietly closed the door behind him. A hush fell over the Common Room, only the crackle of a dying fire could be heard and the occasional page being turned. This was Sirius' favorite version of the Gryffindor Common Room, it was the version that felt the most like his own. He loved being one of the last people in the room.

Sirius tilted his head and looked over at Claire. From the floor, he could only see the top third of her face. Her long brown hair fell in waves around her and her brow was furrowed as she concentrated on the book in her hands. He stood quietly and sat on the armrest of the chair she was in.

The only movement that Claire made was her eyes darting from left to right across the pages in front of her. Sirius stared at her for a moment and then gently closed the book. She looked startled over at him as if coming out of a trance.

"Claire," The words came gently out of his mouth, "The book can wait until tomorrow. You should probably get some sleep."

"What time is it?" Claire rubbed her eyes and let out a large yawn.

"Well past the time you usually stay up until on a Saturday," Sirius stood and stretched his arms above his head, "What were you reading anyway?"

"Nothing…" He looked at her, uninterested in skirting around a topic at this hour. She sighed, "I borrowed a book from the library. I thought it might have something useful in there about lycanthropy."

"And?"

"And it was the same information that I have read in every other book I have borrowed," Claire's shoulders slumped over as she spoke.

"Why are you reading up so much on werewolves?" Sirius pulled the book out of her lap, "What exactly are you looking for?"

"I don't know…" Claire's voice trailed off as she stared at the fire as the last embers went out, "He told me that his parents would lock him in his room when he transformed. Now he's here and every month he sits in that abandoned building alone. It's not fair that he has to go through that all on his own."

Since the day that Remus had confided in them that he was a werewolf, he had noticed Claire spend even more time reading than usual. Although he knew that she had always taken her spellwork seriously, he suspected that she was searching for answers to Remus' condition. Sirius wasn't a healer, and he had minimal knowledge of werewolves, but what he did know was that the condition was irreversible. He wasn't spending his time researching for an answer he knew didn't exist.

"There isn't a cure, Claire." Sirius brushed a few stray hairs away from her eyes, she looked over at him her eyes filled with disappointment.

"I know…" She folded her hands in her lap, "There has to be a way that we can help though. I've borrowed every book that even remotely mentions lycanthropy, there aren't any answers in them. I need more information… I'm sure if I had access to more detailed books I could figure something out."

"What do you need me to do?" Claire looked up at him surprised at his offer. She took a deep breath before responding to him.

"I think there are more books on werewolves," Claire said cautiously, "But they're in the restricted section. If I could read them, maybe I could find something useful so that we could actually do something helpful for Remus."

"Let me be clear," Sirius said slowly, "You're asking me to sneak into the restricted section of the library for you?"

Silence passed between them as she stared him down in the darkness. Sirius smirked, he never thought that Claire would be okay with him breaking the rules. Now she was downright encouraging him to do something that was clearly not allowed. The information in the books in the restricted section was way above their ability level and well guarded at all times during the day. Fortunately for Sirius, James had his invisibility cloak. He was sure they'd be able to sneak away the books that Claire needed.

"Not for me… with me."

"Who are you and what have you done with Claire?" Her melodic laughter filled the silent room. Sirius felt extremely content in that moment. Since their first week of classes at Hogwarts, Sirius had felt that he and Claire had been actively working against each other. She had slowly changed from the girl who ate candy with him and asked questions about wizarding traditions to the person who was first to offer an answer during class and nagged him in the evenings about homework.

Their differences in priorities had made it difficult to be around each other without arguing. Since finding out about Remus' lycanthropy, Sirius had viewed Claire in a different light. Her bookishness faded and a spotlight shined on her loyalty; even with knowing that Remus was a werewolf, a fact that would have been terrifying to most others, she didn't change a thing about how she interacted with him. This was a version of Claire that he not only tolerated, but he respected.

"Will you help me?" Sirius could only make out the outline of Claire in the darkness.

"I thought you'd never ask."


	10. Chapter 10

**Authors' Note: So sorry for the gap in posting, I was away on vacation but now I'm back! The break gave me some time to brainstorm and really plan out some of the upcoming chapters of this story. My fingers have been busy typing away and I hope to have more for you very soon.**

* * *

Chapter 10

Remus sat in the library huddled over a large piece of parchment. It was not exactly how he imagined spending his Saturday, but he knew that this essay needed to get done before he could even think about the other homework that was piled up on his bedside table. He pulled his cloak tighter around him, the weather had finally seemed to be taking a turn for the better but it definitely wasn't what he would call warm. Most other students were enjoying their weekend, a good portion of them sleeping in most likely, before preparation for exams would creep up on them. He seemed to be the only student in the library this early on a Saturday morning. However, he always found it easiest to focus when he was in a quiet and mostly empty library.

Remus scratched out a few things on his essay that would need to be altered before he could even consider turning it in for marking. He made note of one paragraph that he felt could be expanded and opened his textbook to look for more information. A loud thud from across the table brought him out of his acute focus, he looked up and saw a bleary-eyed Claire sitting across from him. She yawned and rubbed her eyes furiously before opening the large textbook she had placed on the table.

"Good morning," Remus smiled at her as she yawned again and pulled her wavy hair over her shoulder. She grunted in response and flipped the page of her book. "You're very cheery this morning."

"I was up late last night," Claire muttered, "This is the most cheer I can muster on the amount of sleep I got."

"Homework?" Remus asked curiously, he knew that Claire was even more on top of her homework assignments than he was. It seemed odd that she would be up working on something until the late hours of the evening. For a second he wondered if he had overlooked a particularly difficult assignment.

"Extracurricular research." Claire glanced up at him and spoke softly. Remus felt a tightness in his chest.

This term was what Claire had settled on for disguising the rule-breaking she had been doing on his behalf. Although James and Sirius liked to call it his 'furry little problem', Claire naturally wanted something less ridiculous sounding and more inconspicuous. Ever since his friends had found out about his lycanthropy, they had been coordinating to spend time in the restricted section of the library. He had protested, this seemed like way too much risk for them to take just for him but they had been insistent, or more correctly, Claire had been insistent.

Remus had been shocked to see how well Claire and Sirius had been working together to do some research on his behalf. Amazingly, Claire was only angry about James' invisibility for a good ten minutes before resigning herself to using it with Sirius to break into the library after had become more relaxed about the rules and Sirius had been spending more time in the library attempting to scout out which books might be the most helpful. Remus had even spotted Sirius doing his homework at the same table that Claire usually occupied in the Common Room ("If you tell her I'm following her study schedule, I'll hex you.") on more than one occasion.

Remus had played out many situations in his head during his first year at Hogwarts, to prepare himself for how his friends would react to finding out he was a werewolf; strengthening their friendship had never been a result he had considered. He had to admit, the reduction in arguments between Sirius and Claire had made things easier. He might even go out on a limb and say that they enjoyed each other's company now.

"Any luck?" Remus tried to be as vague as possible in case Madam Pince was listening in on their conversation. Claire shook her head.

"We will try again next weekend," Remus nodded solemnly, "Don't lose hope, I will figure it out."

"What if there is nothing to figure out?"

"Don't be daft," Claire said quickly, "This is the largest collection of books I have ever seen. There is an answer somewhere and I promise you I will find it."

Remus admired her optimism, even if he didn't feel so optimistic himself. Claire hunched over the large book again and started to take notes on the parchment to her right. The only noise that passed between them was the scratching of her quill. Remus watched her bright blue eyes as they moved from page to parchment and back again; Claire brushed some of her hair out of her face and then looked up at him questioningly.

"What?" She asked quietly, "Do I have toothpaste on my face?" She rubbed her mouth with the back of her hand with a slightly panicked look on her face.

"No," Remus smiled at her, "You look nice this morning, that's all."

"Oh," Claire blushed slightly and shifted in her seat, "Thank you."

Remus turned back to his homework and quietly began to rewrite his essay. He looked up once more and his eyes connected with Claire's. He felt his heartbeat quicken before he looked away and focused on the hard work that was ahead of him. They fell into an easy silence once more, working beside each other on their homework as they had many times before.

* * *

"I will be taking that!" The parchment that Remus had been working so intensely on was pulled from underneath his fingertips, the ink on his quill dripped onto the wooden table of the library. Remus looked quickly up to see Sirius holding his essay. "And this one as well."

Claire quickly slapped his hand as he went to swipe her parchment. He let out a groan and attempted a second time to take her parchment, this time he was successful. Claire stood and reached for the parchment which he held above his head and out of her reach.

"Sirius," Remus said in the hopes he could talk some reason into him before an argument broke out. Hadn't he been thinking earlier today how well they had been getting along? Clearly, he had spoken too soon and Claire looked as if she were about to pounce on him. Remus would rather not spend the rest of the afternoon acting as a barrier between the two. "If you give us the parchment, we can probably join you later for some chess or Exploding Snap."

"You have to join me now," Sirius said holding the parchment even higher as Claire jumped to reach it.

"Give me back my parchment," Claire glared at him and pulled his arm in an attempt to bring her essay to her since she was unsuccessful and bringing herself to the essay. "I'm too tired for this today Sirius."

"That's such a shame," Sirius smirked at her as she tried again to pull his arm, "I do so enjoy watching you jump around like a toad."

"That's it," Claire pulled her wand from her pocket and pointed it squarely at his chest, "Remus, remind me of the incantation for the knee reversal hex. Today seems like the perfect day to try it out."

"You don't scare me…" Sirius said smiling at her. She pressed the tip of her wand into his chest and began to apply pressure, "Much. You don't scare me much. Ow."

"Claire," Remus pushed her wand hand down and gave her a warning look, he then turned on Sirius, "I'm not really interested in a fight today. Besides, you're just postponing us actually spending time with you so it would be in your best interest to give the parchment back and go find someone else to torment for a few hours."

"I can't."

"Remus, move out of my way," Remus could feel Claire begin to pull her wand back up but he forced it back down again.

"Come on, Sirius." He pleaded with him.

"I can't let you both sit in the library all day-"

"We have homework to do." Remus interrupted him.

"- when there is Quidditch to be watched." Sirius rolled the parchments up and shoved them into the pocket of his robes. "Gryffindor is one win away from pulling into the lead and James is playing. Homework has to wait."

"I have no interest-" Claire said quietly, hyper aware that Madam Pince was staring daggers at them.

"Let me repeat myself," Sirius said slowly, "Our friend, James- you remember him, right?- is playing an important Quidditch game for our house today. You two bookworms haven't attended a game all season. I have made an executive decision that you can spend all day in the library tomorrow, but you're coming to the game today."

Remus sighed, he knew that Sirius was not going to budge on this one. He also knew that he was, for once, right. Even though Remus came to Hogwarts with the intention of making the most of the education he received here, being an active member of his house meant attending Quidditch games. Although he did have an excuse for missing some games due to his transformations, there were others that he had missed just from spending the day doing homework instead.

"Alright, alright." Remus raised his hands in defeat and began to pack up his belongings.

Claire continued to glare over at Sirius, not moving from her spot.

"Your stubbornness knows no bounds," Sirius shook his head at her as she angrily crossed her arms.

"I want my parchment."

"And I want a phoenix," Sirius chuckled, "Unfortunately neither of those things are happening."

"I don't know anything about Quidditch-"

"Brilliant," Sirius said quickly before she could continue, "I will finally be able to teach you something useful. Come on." Sirius swept all of her things into her bag and shoved it onto her shoulder. Claire looked hopelessly over at Remus.

"Unfortunately," Remus said while Sirius drug them from the library and into the hallway, "He's just as stubborn as you are."

* * *

Sirius paced in the Common Room, he should have never let Claire go up to her dorm. Now he had no way to force her out of her room and drag her toward the Quidditch pitch. Remus sat quietly in an armchair, his eyes following Sirius as he paced back and forth. If Sirius kept it up he was going to wear a hole right into the old rug that covered the floor.

"Just realizing that she is probably doing her homework up there, are you?" Sirius glared over at Remus and tried to develop an alternate plan. Maybe he could convince a girl to go up there for him and pull her from her room. He probably couldn't convince Lily to do it, she wasn't exactly fond of him. What other second year Gryffindor girls did he know that would agree to help him? He couldn't think of anyone; he wasn't exactly close friends with the other Gryffindor girls.

The portrait hole swung open and in scurried Peter from the Great Hall. Sirius wondered if he should start shouting, if he was loud enough maybe she wouldn't be able to focus on her homework and come down herself.

"Ready to go?" Peter asked and he swung his Gryffindor scarf around his neck.

"We're waiting on Claire."

"We could be waiting forever," Remus said to Peter, "She wasn't exactly enthusiastic about going to the game. I doubt she's coming back down from the dormitory."

"We're waiting on Claire," Sirius repeated himself loudly. The door to the girls' dormitory opened and Sirius saw Claire run down the stairs, her long wavy hair trailing behind her. He glanced over at Remus who looked pleasantly surprised.

"Alright, let's get this over with," Claire said as she walked past Sirius and over to Remus.

"Wait," Sirius stepped closer to her and she looked suspiciously at him. He tugged the Gryffindor scarf off of himself and pulled a red and gold knit hat from his pocket. Sirius placed the scarf around her neck and put the hat on her head. "Can't let you go to a game without showing your Gryffindor spirit."

* * *

The four of them huddled together and made their way to the pitch. Sirius wondered with every step that they took if Claire would abandon them and make her way back to the castle. For March it was still fairly cold and rather damp, he probably should have waited until the weather was nicer to convince her to attend a game. With Mother Nature working against him, it would be even more difficult to trick Claire into actually enjoying herself at a purely social event.

However, Claire continued to trudge along proving Sirius' instincts wrong. She had a bag slung over her shoulder and had wrapped his scarf a couple times around her neck for warmth. Sirius walked with Peter as he prattled on about the game. Sirius was really only half-listening and found himself paying more attention to his surroundings than his friend's excited words. He noticed two older Gryffindors up ahead, they were walking hand-in-hand and the girl was whispering something into her companion's ear. He laughed heartily in response and then leaned over and planted a kiss on her cheek. Sirius looked away, not wanting to intrude on their moment and noticed Claire and Remus.

They were standing quite close to each other and were speaking in quiet voices. Remus beamed at Claire as she began to talk more animatedly, moving her arms emphatically as she spoke. There was no denying that Claire and Remus were incredibly close; they seemed to both have the same intense need to spend time in the library. He feared that if they spent any more time together, they would fuse at the hip. Sirius would need to keep an eye on them. If he wasn't careful, they were going to turn into that couple he had been watching; they would be walking to Quidditch games together alone, sharing whispers in the corridors, and stealing kisses when no one was looking. His stomach churned just thinking of it.

Sirius didn't mind that people dated, he fully expected that before graduating each member of his social circle would have gone on at least one date. He just didn't like the idea of dating changing the dynamics that were currently in place. It had taken a full year to get to a point where Claire wasn't making him want to pull his hair from his head on a weekly basis, changing the status quo wasn't really an option now. Sirius was too content with how things were in exactly this moment. He would hate for it to go from being Sirius, James, Remus, Peter, and Claire to _Claire and Remus_ and Sirius, James, and Peter.

"I think that as long as James keeps an eye on McMillan," Peter's voice brought Sirius out of his thoughts and back to reality, "I think that this game will be easily won." Remus laughed and stepped closer to Claire and adjusted the scarf wrapped around her neck.

"Sure," Sirius added half-heartedly. He changed directions and came up behind Remus and Claire. Before Remus could reach over to adjust the knit hat on her head, Sirius wedged himself between the two. "What are you two whispering about over here?"

"Remus was just explaining Quidditch to me," Claire said surprised at his sudden presence.

"Remus?" Sirius threw his arm over Remus and Claire's shoulders and looked over at Claire, "I'm offended, if you were going to learn about Quidditch you should come to the expert. No offense there Remus."

"None taken," Remus shrugged.

"Sirius Black, an expert?" Claire scoffed at him, "I find that hard to believe."

"Believe it."

"Tell me then, oh wise one," Claire said putting on her most sarcastic tone of voice, "What is the point of having chasers score goals when catching the snitch is worth so much more?"

Sirius dropped the arm from Remus' shoulder and guided Claire slightly away from him as he explained the nuances of the game she had never seen before. Sirius caught Remus' eye and thought he could detect slight irritation, but he was quickly distracted by Peter who had appeared beside him desperate for someone to talk about Quidditch with.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

As they approached the pitch, Sirius answered every question that Claire had about the game. Which was way more than he expected her to have, clearly her inquisitive nature did not stop when she left the classroom. By the time they had taken their places in the stands, he felt that she had a pretty good grasp on how the game worked. Even though she had seemed completely distracted by her conversation with Sirius, he still managed to get the four of them into the stands and keep himself between Remus and Claire without raising any red flags. Maybe this distance would put off what he felt was inevitable.

When the game began, Claire started to fidget with her bag and pulled out a large sign that had _Go Gryffindor!_ written in her immaculate handwriting in bold red ink. She tapped the poster with her wand and quietly murmured to herself. The ink began to fade between red and gold and then back to red again. Sirius looked over at her and smirked.

"When did you make that?"

"When I was in my dormitory," Claire remarked, "What do you think took me so long?"

Even when Sirius felt that he had a handle on her personality and behaviors, Claire always seemed to do something that made him feel as though he didn't know her at all. That might prove to be a frustration to others, but Sirius liked that she kept him on his toes. Claire looked away from him and pointed in the direction of the pitch at James, she whooped as he flashed past one of the Ravenclaw beaters and hurtled in the direction of the hoops.

"He's starting off really strong," Remus said loudly so he could be heard over the crowd, Sirius nodded.

"Yeah, he's showing off early," Sirius commented with a smirk on his face, "If he wins this game today we might never hear the end of it."

"There he goes!" Peter yelled as James streaked down the second half of the pitch and suddenly flew in the opposite direction to confuse the Ravenclaw Keeper before aiming for the middle hoop. The Quaffle easily flew through it and Gryffindor scored their first goal. The stands erupted with cheering and Claire held her sign above her head and joined in chanting with the rest of the students.

Gryffindor scored four more goals before Ravenclaw scored their first. James was really in rare form today as he blew past the oppositions' Chasers as if they were rooted in place. Ravenclaw was not to be easily defeated though, and soon the Beaters picked up on some of James' patterns. As James went in for his third goal, the Ravenclaw Beater McMillan sent a Bludger hurtling his way. When James pulled back to wind up his throw, the Bludger slammed into his right arm and he dropped the Quaffle.

The Gryffindor fans groaned and watched as James pulled his arm into his chest and solely used his left arm to direct his broom back toward the opposite end of the field where Ravenclaw made their second goal of the game.

"His arm looks broken!" Claire said adjusting the binoculars she had stolen ("I'm just borrowing them!") from Peter. Sirius was now holding the sign that she had made.

"He's okay!" Sirius cheered loudly as Gryffindor got possession of the Quaffle again.

"He's hurt!" James had caught the Quaffle with his left hand and passed it to his teammate in a wobbly throw, his right arm still held against his body. Sirius shrugged.

"The game isn't over yet! He will be fine."

Claire glanced at Sirius apprehensively before pulling the binoculars back up to her eyes to not miss any more of the game. Since the Bludger hit James, the Gryffindor offense had seemed to lose some of their momentum and in the blink of an eye, Ravenclaw scored three more goals. James sped across the pitch once more, stopped directing his broom to catch the Quaffle with his uninjured arm, and hurled it at the goalpost scoring once more for Gryffindor.

Claire let out a yelp suddenly and pointed at the Gryffindor Seeker has she sped off across the pitch with the Ravenclaw Seeker not far behind. Gryffindor made a steep dive and very suddenly the game was over. Gryffindor had won 210 to 50. Claire jumped up and down and cheered loudly for James. Sirius could feel a smile creep onto his face while he watched her.

"Better than homework?" He leaned over so she could hear him over the crowd. She turned herself toward him and laughed, her bright eyes shining.

"Just a bit."

* * *

After spending some time hanging around the Quidditch pitch to see if they could catch James for a brief moment, they began to head back to the castle. Their enthusiasm for the win kept them warm as they walked back up the damp hill; the prospect of a hot meal made their steps brisker than usual. James had promised to meet them in the Great Hall after debriefing with the team and a short visit to the Hospital Wing, he had in fact broken his arm ("I told you, Sirius!").

Remus walked next to Claire again, he wondered for a moment if Sirius had intentionally separated them before. Sirius strolled contentedly beside them twirling his wand between his fingers. If he had, Remus couldn't really understand the logic behind it. Claire had always been close friends with him, her quiet nature usually meant she gravitated the most toward Remus. He decided that it was probably just a coincidence.

Claire recounted some of the more exciting aspects of the game, he was surprised how much she seemed to enjoy it. He also knew that once they got back into the castle she would remember the essay Sirius had stolen from her and the talk of Quidditch would completely cease. She had tried to give the knit hat and scarf back to Sirius, but he had insisted that she keep it. Remus suspected that he was so pleased she enjoyed herself and didn't talk about homework once, that he was using the items as some crude form of positive reinforcement.

"I do hope that Madam Pomfrey is able to patch James up quickly," Claire commented as she adjusted the bag on her shoulder, "I'm sure having a broken arm isn't terribly comfortable."

"Madam Pomfrey will fix him up in a jiffy," Peter added, "I've seen plenty of Quidditch players head to the hospital with much worse injuries and they're all mended really quickly."

Remus listened as Claire and Peter continued to talk about the frequency of Quidditch injuries. He looked over at Sirius and noticed him peering up ahead of them on the path, they had closed the gap between them and the other students. Immediately he recognized the auburn hair; he was surprised he didn't know that Lily had any interest in Quidditch matches. Next to her was none other than Severus Snape, Remus' stomach dropped. Silence had spread through their small group and Claire's mouth had become a tight line as she looked over and noticed the gears turning in Sirius' head.

"Leave him be," Claire said quickly before Sirius could develop even an inkling of a plan, "He's just walking."

"I wasn't going to do anything," Sirius began to twirl his wand faster, he avoided eye contact with Claire.

"Yes, you were," Claire looked at Remus for support but he stayed silent, "I've seen that look one too many times."

"What look?"

"The one where you are hatching some kind of scheme," Claire attempted to snatch his wand from him, but his reflexes were too fast.

"Oh, come on Claire," Sirius responded jovially, "I just wanted to help him get into the spirit. He's not dressed to celebrate Gryffindor winning, I thought he could use a splash of color so he's not walking around like he's attending a funeral all of the time."

"No," Claire shook her head at him, "He hasn't even provoked you, he doesn't even know you're walking behind him."

"That's what would make it such a pleasant surprise," A mischievous glint shined behind Sirius' eyes. The more Claire tried to talk him out of it, the more excited at the prospect of a good hex he seemed to become.

"Sirius, please," Claire begged, "We have had such a good day, can't we just go back to the castle and enjoy dinner without-"

Sirius didn't hear the second half of Claire's sentence, he raised his wand and with a flick and a mutter turned Severus' hair bright red. Severus stopped dead in his tracks and turned around to notice Sirius snickering a few feet behind him; he raised his wand to cast a spell but Sirius disarmed him before he could even open his mouth. Lily picked up Severus' wand from the ground and he took it angrily before storming back up to the castle. Lily glared at the group and shook her head at Claire before turning on her heel and marching off after Severus.

"Lily, wait!" Claire shouted and began to sprint after her. Lily snapped the castle door behind her and Claire stood there for a moment in stunned silence before looking over her shoulder at Sirius with severe disappointment in her eyes.

"Did you really have to?" Remus muttered quietly to Sirius.

"Come on," Sirius said in response, "If you heard some of the things that Snivellus and his friends said when Claire wasn't around, you'd want to do the same."

Remus knew enough about the wizarding world to know that not everyone agreed about the admissions process of Hogwarts. There were some, like the Slytherins that Severus was surrounded with and the Black family, who believed that students like Claire shouldn't be allowed to attend. Although he had never heard Snape say anything like this about Claire, he knew that some of his fellow Slytherins could possibly have.

"Regardless," Remus tried to reason with him, "She lives with Lily. You and James continually hexing Snape doesn't make things easy for her in her dormitory." Sirius seemed to consider this point for a moment.

"You think she's angry?" Peter asked quietly.

Claire opened the door to the castle and slammed it shut behind her.

* * *

Dinner at the Great Hall tasted even more delicious than usual, Sirius was sure that the Gryffindor win had seriously impacted the quality of their food. When he, Remus, and Peter arrived, they looked around their usual spot for Claire. She was nowhere to be seen. He shrugged it off and took his seat. She really seemed to have the flare for the dramatic sometimes.

Thankfully, Remus kept quiet during the dinner; Sirius didn't want to hear about how he shouldn't have hexed Snape. Yes, he wasn't provoked today but he had been provoked plenty of times before. In his opinion, Snape deserved every hex that was thrown his way. He couldn't understand how Remus was always so keen to side with Claire. James bounded into the Great Hall not too long after them, took a seat to the right of Sirius, and filled his plate up with some roast chicken and mashed potatoes.

"Where's Claire?" He asked as he stuffed some food into his mouth, "I thought she had been with you all at the match?"

"Long story," Sirius muttered, wishing to change the subject before Remus could chime in. "How's your arm?"

James filled them in with details from the game and his short visit to see Madam Pomfrey. Although they had all seen the game together, it was fun to replay the most exciting moments from James' perspective. He didn't hesitate to elaborate excessively when talking about the goals he scored. Peter hung onto his every word and Sirius rolled his eyes slightly at some of the more obvious embellishments.

After stuffing themselves full of delicious food, they walked back to the Common Room together hoping to play a couple round of chess. As Sirius climbed through the portrait hole he half expected to see Claire sitting on a squat armchair by the fire reading a book in a huff of anger, but she was nowhere to be seen in the Common Room. He was content to not see her for the rest of the evening and enjoy playing games with James and Peter.

The next morning, he didn't spot Claire at breakfast and didn't think much of it until Remus mentioned that he hadn't seen her in the library either. James and Sirius spent most of the morning combing the school grounds at her usual spots to see if she was at a desk writing furiously or reading in an empty classroom. In a desperate moment, Sirius approached a fifth-year girl to check and see if Claire was alright. He sent her up with Claire's essay in the hopes that the reminder Sirius had stolen it would pry her from her room.

"She's up there," The girl said when she came back down the stairs, "She said she doesn't want to speak with anyone."

"Right, thanks," James raised his eyebrows and glanced at Sirius.

"She will have to come out tomorrow," Sirius said rubbing the back of his head absentmindedly, "We have classes in the morning."

Remus stood tight-lipped and sighed. Sirius knew without Remus' palpable worry that this was serious. Claire had been angry with him before, but she had never locked herself up in her room for an entire twenty-four hours. He still felt that she was overreacting to the situation; by this time Severus had probably reversed the hex and was going about his day skulking around the dungeons. Nothing about the hex he had performed had been damaging or permanent.

Uncharacteristically, Sirius woke early the next morning and walked down to breakfast alone. He hoped to be able to catch Claire before their first class started. He would swallow his pride and apologize so that they could put this whole thing behind them. The Great Hall was quieter than it usually was and only a few students sat at their respective house tables munching on bits of toast and slurping on tea.

Claire sat at the very end of the Gryffindor table, far from where she usually sat. Her long hair fell slightly damp at her shoulders and she sat hunched over a book. As Sirius approached her, she looked up and then quickly turned her body away from him. Clearly, she wasn't going to make this apology easy, he sighed heavily.

Sirius sat down next to her and reached over to her plate and stole some buttered toast. She glared at him out of the corner of her eye as he took a large bite out of the toast and grinned at her.

"Fancy seeing you here," His apology skills were rusty. Claire lifted her book up in front of her face so she wouldn't have to look at him. "Oh come on!"

She dramatically turned the page of her book and pushed the rest of her toast over to him, clearly not wanting anything to do with food he had touched. He sighed and shoved the rest of the toast in his mouth. Maybe he didn't want to apologize at all at this point. She could go on ignoring him for the next five years if she wanted.

"I'm sorry," Sirius blurted out much louder than he had intended. Claire flipped another page of her book and continued to refuse to look at him. "I'm actually apologizing, the least you can do is look at me."

For a moment he thought that she was beyond reason, but then she lowered the book and closed it. He got a good look at her face and noticed that her eyes were bloodshot. Sirius had prepared himself for her to glare at him, but she just looked exhausted and sad.

"That's the best apology you can muster?" Claire sighed and looked around at the other students who had become curious and were listening in on their conversation, "I get a half-hearted 'I'm sorry' and you steal my breakfast… Apology accepted, clearly."

"I didn't realize you were going to react this way," Sirius felt genuine regret creep into his voice.

"Why are you apologizing?" Claire snapped at him.

"I'm apologizing because I didn't mean to make things more difficult for you," Sirius reached over and grabbed some toast and buttered it before placing it on her plate and sliding it over to her in a peace offering, "Lily is your roommate, she's friends with Snape, I should have realized that hexing him - no matter how warranted it might be- puts you in an awkward position."

She sighed and shook her head at him.

"That's not why I stayed in my room all day yesterday," Sirius stared at her dumbfounded, "Yes, you hexing Severus does make things tense in my dorm, but that's not why I'm upset.

"Before I came to Hogwarts," Claire continued while lazily playing with the toast Sirius had offered her, "I went to a school close to my home. Believe it or not, the students there were less of a fan of my interest in reading than you and James are. I wore different clothes than they did, I read different books, I didn't watch the cartoons they watched on the weekends. I was different, but not in a good way.

"They teased me," Claire looked down sadly, "Relentlessly. They pulled my hair and called me names. They would imitate me behind our teachers back."

"Claire-"

"Snape did nothing to you," Claire stopped him and looked over with teary eyes, "He was just walking along with his friend, and you targeted him for no reason other than the fact that he's different from you. I know exactly what that feels like, Sirius."

"I didn't realize- I'm sorry," Sirius stuttered, he didn't know that she would respond so negatively to the fun that he and James had at Snape's expense. He simultaneously wished he could express to her the concerns he had about the attitudes being bred in Slytherin. Sirius knew, better than any of his friends, the beliefs that some of the Slytherin students had about blood status and Muggles attending Hogwarts. He wanted to shield her from all of that.

As if she could read his mind she looked over at him and said, "I'm not a fool. I know the types of things that some of the Slytherins say about me."

"Who- Tell me who said something to you, I will hex them-"

"It doesn't matter," Claire interrupted him.

"It does!" Sirius exclaimed and Claire sighed.

"You are a Gryffindor," Claire said emphatically, "There is nothing brave in hexing someone with their backed turned on you. Be the person who I met on the train and helped me with my trunk without being asked, the person who taught me everything I know about the wizarding world, the one who agreed to do something risky if it meant helping a friend. Don't be like the bullies I knew in school, be better."

"I'm sorry."

"I know," Claire took a bite of toast and offered Sirius the other half. He smiled at her and accepted it. They sat in silence eating their breakfast, the air thick with the unsaid worries that both of them had.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Claire slipped a pair of simple pearl earrings into her ears and glanced at herself in the mirror briefly. She didn't think that she looked 13, she looked every bit a 12-year-old as she did yesterday. Regardless of how she looked, her birthday was today, she was officially a teenager. From her room, she could hear an electric mixer humming in the kitchen as her mother made a pound cake for after dinner. Claire took one more look at herself in her yellow sundress as she pulled her long wavy hair back into a ponytail.

Her father wasn't home from the church yet, so she hung the cardigan that she would typically wear with this dress back in the closet for now. It was hot today, too hot to wear any additional layers. Her mother was more lenient, she was sure that as long as she wore the cardigan at dinner everything would be fine.

Claire glanced at the calendar she hung near her mirror. On the first day of being home for the summer, she had purchased herself a calendar so she could mark off the days that passed until she could head back to Hogwarts. Any calendar would have been sufficient, so she ended up grabbing the first one she saw and now was faced daily with a picture of a dog with curly black fur and a cropped tail. Its bright pink tongue hung out of its mouth as it bounded happily through a field. This dog looked much happier than she was as she crossed off one more day in July.

Claire loved her parents, they had given her everything that she had ever needed but things had not improved with her father since she received her Hogwarts acceptance letter two years ago. Even though all three members of the Ludgrove family actively pretended like things were normal, a cloud hung over all of their interactions. The Reverend Ludgrove could neither forget nor pretend that he didn't know his daughter was a witch, that she had chosen a path that he deemed to be full of sin. It broke Claire's heart each time he avoided eye contact with her while they were in church. He would talk to her, but without truly engaging in the conversation.

When Claire was young they would have endless conversations during dinner or while taking a walk together. She had admired her father intensely, as most children did; he seemed to have all of the answers to the questions that she asked. He knew why the sky was blue, what to say if a classmate was mean to her, and how to calm her down when she woke from a nightmare. Now, most of their conversations were about the weather or his most recent homily.

Claire heard a knock at the front door, the sound of the mixer in the kitchen stopped and her mother's voice carried up the stairs to her room.

"Claire, front door!" The mixer continued as Claire bounded down the stairs and opened the door to see four faces smiling at her that she did not expect. The smile on her own face fell as it sank in that she was standing face-to-face with Sirius, James, Remus, and Peter.

"What… What are you all doing here?" Claire let the screen door close behind her as she stepped out onto the cement stairs.

"That's quite the welcome for friends who came all the way out here for your birthday," James smiled at her and held up a cage that had a tiny white owl with brown streaks. The owl let out a small hoot and it's golden eyes opened up wider to take in its surroundings.

"Happy Birthday!" Sirius said in his gruff voice pulling a large bag of candy out from behind his back.

Claire felt panic begin to set in, her father could come home at any moment and he'd have some questions about why there were four boys standing in his front yard holding a bag of unusual candy and a caged owl. Her friend's presence, whether they knew it or not, broke the rule that mother created when she agreed to take her to Diagon Alley… no talk of or actually doing magic in the house.

"We should probably put the owl inside," James made his way over to the door, "Honestly, the cage is kind of heavy- "

"No!" Claire hastily cut him off and blocked the pathway to the door, "We… we can do that later."

"Don't be like that," Sirius added, "We brought the owl all of this way."

"We?" James scoffed, "We? I don't recall you carrying it at all."

"I recall someone showing off their Quidditch muscles in the Common Room a lot last year," Sirius rolled his eyes, "Now that same somebody seems too weak to carry a small owl a few blocks."

"Who's here?" The screen door squeaked slightly as it opened and her mother peeked her head out into the front yard. Her eyes scanned over the group standing in front of her. "Claire?"

"...They're friends… from school." Claire paused unsure of how she was going to salvage this situation. Mrs. Ludgrove gave her a stern look while wiping some flour from her hands onto her apron. "I wasn't expecting them."

"My parents moved a few blocks away," Remus offered to help support Claire's claim, "We thought since we were so close we would just drop by to say happy birthday."

"Your father will be heading home soon," Her mother reached into the house and grabbed her purse and pulled out some money, "I suggest that you take your friends and go get some ice cream."

Claire nodded quietly and gently took the money from her mother.

"Claire," Mrs. Ludgrove glanced around at her friends and gave them all a small smile, "You know that when your father gets home-"

"I know," Claire cut her mother off before she could continue.

Mrs. Ludgrove gave a sad smile to the group and then went back into the house and closed the door behind her. Claire turned to face her friends, they stood in silence for a moment and the owl gave another hoot.

"Is it just me… or was that a fairly uncomfortable interaction?" Peter was the first person to speak.

"What was that all about?" James placed the cage on the ground.

"You can't just drop by!" Claire shouted at him, "You couldn't have given me any warning?"

"No!" Sirius gave her an irritated look, "Giving you a warning would ruin the entire surprise that we spent weeks planning. It took a lot of coordinating to get all of us at Remus' flat before ditching his parents to walk all the way over here."

"I'm from a Muggle family," Claire looked around to make sure no neighbors were listening in to their conversation, "Guests don't just drop by with an owl in tow."

Remus walked over to Claire and reached for her hand, she hadn't realized until that moment that her fingers were trembling. He looked at her gently and pulled the money from her tight grasp.

"Let's go get some ice cream," Remus took the owl, hid it behind some shrubbery, and led the group out of the yard. He made a right at the sidewalk toward a cul de sac where an ice cream truck was parked. Sirius walked at the back of the group, he stopped suddenly and grabbed Claire's arm.

"I know Remus seems content just to get ice cream," Claire tried to pull away but he had a relatively firm grip on her, "But, what in the hell is going on?"

"You startled me just dropping by," She muttered, "Everything would have been easier if you had warned me."

"Are you not allowed to have friends visit?"

"Let's just go get ice cream," Claire pried her arm away from Sirius and brushed past James making her way to the truck. Peter stepped in front of her path to stop her.

"Just tell us," Peter's squeaky voice drifted over to her.

"Claire?" She looked up at saw her neighbor, Mrs. Santos hobbling over in her direction with her cane. "I thought that was you! Are these your friends?"

"Yes," Claire watched as her neighbor looked hesitantly at the group of boys standing behind her.

"You must all go to school with her in London!" She said kindly in her warbled voice, "Her mother and father don't really talk much about the school, but I know that Claire loves it there. I just wish she would come home more often, her Aunt seems to usurp all of her time with weekend trips to different chapels and historic sites. I have said many times how unfair it is, Claire already lives with her during the school week, the least she could do is relinquish her on the weekends." Claire noticed James and Sirius shoot each other a confused look as the elderly woman spoke.

"I won't bother you for too long, dear," Claire smiled at her, "Could you please tell your father that I appreciate him adding my niece's name to the prayer circle this week? She's been doing much better recently."

"I will."

"I will see you Sunday, bright and early," Claire nodded silently, "Give Reverend and Mrs. Ludgrove my best."

Claire took a moment to watch her neighbor walk away before turning to look at her friends. She blushed deeply and shifted her weight from her left leg to her right.

"Your father is a priest?" Remus' voice cut through the silence.

"Yes-well, I suppose... technically."

"Why didn't you tell us?" Remus studied Claire carefully as if he were trying to read her mind.

"It's complicated."

"Why did your mother send us away from the house to get ice cream?" Claire avoided eye contact with Sirius as he spoke.

"When I got my acceptance letter to Hogwarts, my father didn't want me to attend," She blurted out, "He still doesn't want me to attend. He is strong in his convictions and he believes that magic is… well, he's very literal in his interpretations, to say the least."

"You ended up going to Hogwarts anyway," James looked over at Claire cautiously.

"I accepted before he had the chance to forbid me to go," Claire played with the end of her ponytail nervously, "My mother took me to Diagon Alley for my school supplies, she's the one who brings me to the train every year and picks me up when the school year is done. The agreement is that I attend Hogwarts, but I don't talk about magic when I'm home."

"Let me get this right," Sirius said in a loud voice, Claire shushed him and looked around the sidewalk, "You are not allowed to talk about magic at all, you can't have friends visit from Hogwarts, and everyone around here thinks you attend a school in London and live with your Great Aunt?"

"That's… just wrong." Claire looked at Remus, a part of her wanted to be able to disagree with him. To tell him that her father was a good person, who meant well. She knew those things were true, but it didn't make Remus' statement any less right.

"'I'm with Remus," Peter chimed in. James nodded.

"You don't understand," Tears rolled down Claire's cheeks and she brushed them away with the tips of her fingers, "He's my father… he won't- he doesn't…" Claire sat down on the sidewalk and buried her head in her hands. Tears flowed freely down her face as she sniffled.

"Go get five ice creams," Claire heard Remus' voice say and then felt him sit down next to her on the sidewalk. "Claire, look at me."

She wiped the salty tears from her face and sniffled, feeling incredibly foolish for crying on the sidewalk in front of her closest friends. Remus wiped a few tears that had collected on her chin.

"I've been to so many Bible studies Remus," Claire took a shaky breath, "The Scripture my father speaks about every Sunday is very clear, witchcraft is a sin and 'anyone who does these things is detestable to the Lord'."

"You don't believe that…"

"No," Claire said quietly, "But he does. He doesn't even look at me anymore Remus. He looks in my general direction, but not truly at me."

"A few months ago," Remus looked out over the cul de sac and spoke softly, "I stood in my dormitory and told all of you that I'm… well, I'm a monster." Claire opened her mouth to interrupt him and he held his finger up to stop her, "You have insisted since that moment that I'm not, that I'm a good and brave person.

"You are not detestable," Remus leaned over and nudged her with his shoulder tenderly, "You are a good person. Don't, even for a second, begin to think otherwise."

Claire noticed a shadow appear from behind her and then a large bowl of ice cream was placed directly in her eye line. She looked above her and noticed Sirius with a large goofy grin on his face.

"We asked for each type of ice cream they had," Claire peered into the bowl and saw about ten different types of ice cream and a large pile of sprinkles on top of it. Peter held five spoons in his hand and James was shoving handfuls of napkins into his pockets. Sirius helped Claire stand and they all wandered over to find some shade underneath a tree.

No more words were shared about Claire's family, she was thankful that her friends could sense there was nothing else to be said about it. Instead, they talked about their adventures, difficulty of summer homework ("I read the same paragraph about Transfiguration three times to understand it," James groaned), and how many days until they could all be united on the Hogwarts Express. The five of them all shared the one overflowing bowl of ice cream, inhaling it as quickly as possible before the hot sun melted it all. While James and Sirius argued over who would get the butter pecan scoop, Peter ate it and then was soon after chased by the other two who realized they had been swindled.

Claire could not remember a more enjoyable birthday in her life thus far. She realized in that moment that even if she had shared with them her predicament, they would have still risked coming by for a visit anyway. That was the difficulty with being surrounded by a group of Gryffindors, they were always willing to take a risk for a friend. The sun began to set and a smattering of pink and orange overtook the previously blue sky as they wandered back to Claire's house.

Before coming into view of her home, Claire said goodbye to each of her friends and thanked them for their gifts. Sirius handed her the bag of candy and advised her on the best way to sneak the owl into the house and up to her room, James occasionally added his two-cents into the plan. Claire could feel her heart swell as she gave them her final goodbyes and watched them walk away.

She turned and walked stealthily up the sidewalk to the front of her house, ducked below the picture window to grab the cage of her owl, and quietly opened the screen door. Her parent's voices were in the kitchen and she breathed a sigh of relief when she realized they were happily occupied with finishing the preparation for dinner. Light footsteps led her up the stairs and into her bedroom where she slid her lock into place and opened the tiny window she had. Claire was thankful that her owl seemed to know it was best to stay silent; she opened the door to the cage and watched as her tiny owl swooped out of the window and into the dusk.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

A cold draft had begun to seep into the Gryffindor dormitories, Remus pulled on a pair of thicker socks and watched as James threw another log into the wood burning stove in their room. Peter sniffled and then wiped his nose with his sleeve, he had been fighting off a slight cold for the last few days. Remus had begged him to go to Madam Pomfrey for a Pepperup Potion, but he seemed too preoccupied with the shenanigans that James and Sirius were up to recently to spend any time in the Hospital Wing.

Claire pushed a box of tissues over to Peter without looking up from the parchment that was in her hands. Most students were outside enjoying the cool fall weather but Remus, James, Sirius, Peter, and Claire found themselves chained to their homework assignments on this chilly but beautiful Saturday afternoon. Sirius let out a sigh and rolled from his back to his stomach, bringing his textbook with him as he read about the delicate details of Transfiguration. Somehow it seemed that their schoolwork had gotten exponentially harder since second year.

"I don't understand why we need to read about this," James muttered as he scribbled miserably in his essay, "If you ask me, magic is all about doing not about reading."

"If you don't understand the theory," Claire retorted, "You won't be able to do the actual magic."

"You sound exactly like McGonagall," James glared over at her.

"Claire…" Sirius looked up from his book hopefully at her.

"No-"

"You know what would make this easier?" He ignored her and flashed what Remus could only assume was his most charming smile, "If you just let us read your essay, so we can get an idea of what McGonagall is looking for."

"It would be… inspiration," James added, laying on the compliments as thickly as possible.

"Please…" Peter sniffled, his already watery eyes adding to the pathetic tone he used.

For a moment, Remus thought they had actually flattered her into helping them with their essays. She peered at each of them carefully with an amused smile on her face, before ignoring them and turning her eyes back to Remus' essay.

"You are all fools if you think I'm going to do your assignment for you," Her clear voice cut through their remaining hope like a knife.

"No one said anything about doing it for us," James walked over to her and draped his arm around her shoulder, clearly clinging on to the hope the rest had lost "We just desperately need your guidance."

"You're going to need more than guidance if you keep it up," Claire shrugged out from under his arm and gave him a stern look. She walked over to Remus who was sitting closest to the fire.

Typically the Saturday before a due date both Remus and Claire would spend the afternoon out by the lake, it was a way of enjoying their last moments of freedom before another assignment was thrown their way. Remus also knew that spending the day outside playing Exploding Snap and attempting to skip stones on the lake was Claire's way of sticking it to Sirius, James, and Peter that they had put off another assignment until the last minute. He couldn't deny that it was enjoyable to see their envy when the pair returned from an afternoon of fun as they rubbed their sore necks from hunching over homework all day.

This Saturday, though, Remus had some catching up to do. The most recent full moon had left him feeling incredibly behind in all of his coursework, including the Transfiguration essay which was due first thing Monday morning. He had told Claire to go outside without him, but she had insisted staying and helping him. Remus felt guilty that she was holed up in his dormitory, reading over his homework, and evading James and Sirius' relentless requests for help. It was not a great way to spend an afternoon, he knew that.

Since the summer, Remus had a whole new understanding of Claire's need to excel in her spellwork. Although they had never spoken of her home life again, he could only assume that she worked hard so that she could escape from the life her father expected of her. If she was the brightest in the class, maybe she could get a job with the Ministry immediately after graduation and not need to move back home. He hadn't confirmed this with her, but the logic made sense to him. Remus looked over at her, studying the way her nose scrunched up when she concentrated. How anyone could ever think that she was detestable was beyond him; she was quite possibly one of the kindest people he had ever met.

"Oh come on," Sirius groaned, tossing his Transfiguration book on the floor next to his bed, "You're already helping Remus."

"Remus didn't procrastinate all week," Claire looked up and Remus turned away before she could see him watching her, "What did you do with your week, Sirius? I recall seeing you spending your spare time with James… trying to figure out a way to sneak into the Prefects' bathroom and switch the hot and cold taps in the tub?"

"We also wanted to enchant the stained glass window so the mermaid had the face of Filch," Sirius looked at her as if he didn't understand her point.

"It was an important prank," James added as he leaned up against the wall.

"Clearly," Claire rolled her eyes, "Tell me, how did that work out?"

"We got detention, but that's beyond the point," James adjusted his glasses on his face and ruffled the back of his hair. "The point is you're playing favorites. You're helping Remus, but not the rest of us."

"Again, Remus didn't procrastinate," Claire rolled up his parchment and handed it back to him with a smile on her face, "Besides, his essay doesn't need any corrections it looks great."

"Really?" Remus asked hesitantly.

"Exceeds expectations," She beamed at him and took a seat at the edge of James' bed.

"Great," James rushed over and pulled the essay out of Remus' hands before he could even look at it, "Much appreciated, Remus." Sirius rolled off his bed and headed over to James who was haphazardly copying down the important details of Remus' essay. Peter grabbed his tissues and shuffled over to join the other two.

"You're welcome," Remus said pointedly. Claire shot him a look and he shrugged. He wasn't really interested in putting up a fight. A few more days of recovery from the full moon and he could withstand a lengthy argument with Sirius and James about the importance of doing your own work, for today he just gave in.

He leaned his back up against the trunk he had placed at the end of his bed and stretched his arms above his head. If James, Sirius, and Peter managed to stay quiet for a while, he could probably fall asleep right here and now on the floor. Remus closed his eyes briefly and let the warmth from the renewed fire envelop him. Upon opening his eyes, he noticed Claire looking over at him with a small smile on her face. He raised his eyebrows at her in question.

"Is that sweater new?" Claire twirled some of her hair around her pointer finger as she spoke. It was something he had never seen her do before in the years of spending time with her. Remus shook his head in response, confused about where the conversation was heading. Did he need to buy some new sweaters? He knew his clothes weren't really as nice as the clothes that James or Sirius spent their weekends in."I've never seen it before."

"I got it last Christmas," Remus managed to choke out, a sudden surge of self-doubt coursing through his body. "I guess I don't wear it frequently." He looked down at the grey cable-knit sweater wondering if there were any holes in it. Upon inspection, he didn't notice any and he looked up at Claire again slightly confused.

"You look quite dapper in it," Claire said quietly. Remus thought he noticed a slight pink hue spreading across her cheeks, but in the blink of an eye, it seemed to be gone.

"... Thanks," Remus could tell from the warmth emanating from his body that he was blushing. Dapper? Him? Even with the new scars that he had collected from his most recent transformation? He knew the potions that Madam Pomfrey gave him helped some, but he also saw his reflection every day in the mirror. Remus wouldn't dare to call himself dapper even on the best of days.

"What about the rest of us?" Remus looked away from Claire's bright blue eyes and remembered that he was surrounded by his three closest friends. His face turned a darker shade of red and he avoided eye contact with everyone, trying to count the cracks in the ceiling instead.

"What about you?" Claire said sounding much more confident than Remus felt at that moment.

"Are we dapper as well?" Sirius chimed in with a teasing tone.

"You ask that," Claire retorted, "But, I don't think you know what that word means."

"Ouch," James feigned hurt, Remus finally was able to tear his eyes away from the ceiling to see James throw his hand dramatically over his heart.

"That's not an answer," Sirius walked over and sat down next to her.

"I thought you three had an essay to plagiarize?" Claire stopped twirling her hair and crossed her legs.

"We are more than happy to take a moment out of our essay writing to engage in a conversation with you," Sirius grinned and quickly moved his gaze between Claire and Remus, "Anything going on here that we should know about?"

"What are you talking about?" Remus found his voice but felt that it was quieter and raspier than usual. His mouth felt uncommonly dry and his tongue seemed cumbersome and useless for forming sentences.

"Oh please," James chortled and continued to scratch away at his essay, "They're not sneaky enough to keep anything _like that_ from us."

"What are you insinuating?" Claire scoffed at them.

"Nothing," Sirius poked her in the arm playfully, "Just that if you keep complimenting Remus' looks it might give some the impression that you fancy him."

"Friends compliment each other," Claire pushed Sirius' finger away and stood, looking slightly irritated.

"Compliment Sirius and I then," James shoved the essay over to Peter who had stopped listening and made his primary focus copying as much of the essay as possible while everyone else was preoccupied.

"Alright," Claire said sarcastically, "You two look less like a troll than you did yesterday."

"You clearly fancy him!" Sirius pointed a finger at her and laughed heartily. Remus could feel the redness returning to his face, he avoided looking at Claire.

"I do not!"

"Do you two even spend time in the library?" James asked in a joking tone, "Or do you just spend time snogging in the corridors?"

"Go for _moonlit_ walks around the lake?" Sirius laughed.

"Stare into each other's eyes over a game of chess?"

"Feed each other pumpkin pasties?"

"No!" Claire's quiet voice was overpowered by the laughter of the two boys. She stood there and let their laughter calm. "If you're quite finished, I'm going to go grab my Charms homework."

"We don't have any Charms homework," James remarked, with a slight tone of panic in his voice, "Right?"

"I'm sorry," Claire said with a gleam in her eye, "I only share that kind of information with people I go for moonlit walks with. Remus, you want to head to the library with me?"

"Oh come on," Sirius complained, "You know we were only joking!"

"You were right, James," Claire said walking over and standing in the doorway, "I do play favorites."

Remus felt a smile creep onto his face as he watched her walk out of the doorway and toward the Common Room. Peter continued to scribble furiously on his parchment as Sirius and James looked at each other, the smug looks they had previously had while teasing Claire were gone. Remus stood, and with a slight bounce in his step wandered down the stairs toward Claire.

* * *

Claire pulled the collar of her jacket up further to protect her bare neck from the brisk wind that blew through the grounds, she glanced over at Remus as he walked with his jacket unzipped. His head was held higher than it had been previously in the day, the grey sweater Claire had complimented peeking out from under his jacket. She couldn't figure out exactly why she had called him dapper. It's not that she didn't think it, she just had never said something like that out loud before.

She had always prided herself on thinking a great deal before speaking; Claire was careful about her word choices at all times, her mother had encouraged her from a young age to pause before responding. Words, once spoken, could never be erased from the minds of those who had heard them. Once you insulted someone, no matter the number of apologies, the damage was already done.

Claire hadn't insulted anyone though, in fact, she had done quite the opposite. Was it as important to be as careful with the flattering words you chose? She wasn't quite sure. The sweater did make Remus' green eyes stand out and before she had even had a chance to process thinking them, the words had come tumbling out of her mouth. If it had just been Remus, she would have been able to feel confident that the comment would be dropped and things would go on as usual. However, her mouth had made the unfortunate mistake of having no filter when James and Sirius were in the room. She doubted they would let it go so easily.

Remus flashed a slightly nervous smile over at her as they took their usual seat on a bench near the lake. Small waves moved over the surface of the dark body of water in response to the wind that whipped across it. They sat further apart than they usually did, Claire looked over at him for a brief moment before looking away. She felt awkward, why did she feel so awkward?

"Dapper, huh?" Remus looked out at the lake, a smirk turning the corners of his mouth upward. Claire blushed deeply and smiled in response.

"It's a nice sweater," She laughed hoping the uncomfortable feeling in the pit of her stomach would fade away, "That's all."

"Well," Remus cleared his throat and kicked at the dirt beneath his feet, "I suppose I should wear it more often then."

"It makes your eyes pop-" Claire's eyes opened wider than she thought possible. What had gotten into her today? In an attempt to save the conversation, she spoke again to clarify. "The grey color, I mean."

"Noted," Remus smiled over at her. He was gripping the bench, a few new scars caught Claire's eye. It killed her that she still hadn't figured out a way to help him. She remained hopeful, but with every passing full moon, she felt more and more guilty about it. It was unlike her to not keep up her end of a promise. Most of her evenings had become consumed with reading books about lycanthropy, she had even gone to the Muggle library during the summer to see if they had any interesting theories about werewolves. "Just to be clear, making my eyes pop is a good thing?"

"Yes," Claire laughed, feeling her heart rate finally return to its normal level, "It's a good thing."

"Brilliant," Remus seemed to relax at her laughter, he reached down and grabbed a pebble off of the ground and rolled it between his fingers for a moment, "How long do you think it will take for James, Sirius, and Peter to figure out there is no Charms homework?"

"With how thick they are," Claire took in a deep breath of the crisp air, "We could have an hour or two before they figure it out."

"They're smarter than you give them credit," Remus tossed the pebble into the lake and with a small splash, it disappeared.

"And they're not as smart as you make them out to be," Remus shrugged in response, searching for another pebble, "Besides, I factored in the time that they'll spend searching for us in the library before they realize we aren't where I said we would be."

They sat in content silence for a moment, listening as the tiny waves lapped up against the shore and the _plop_ of another pebble dropping into the water creating even tinier waves working in opposition.

"Congratulations, by the way," Remus' voice cut through the silence, "I think this might be the first prank I've seen you play."

"A prank?"

"Yes," Remus chuckled slightly at her shocked response, "I think James and Sirius may have been a bad influence on you. Before we know it, you might be sneaking off with them to steal all of the Slytherin Quidditch robes before the match."

"You and I both know," It was unlike Remus to tease her in this way, but she didn't mind him doing it especially after the embarrassment she put him through before, "The only place I am before a Quidditch match is in the stands with you or in the library with you."

"I'm beginning to think you only spend time with me," Remus' green eyes looked brighter as he turned to her and continued to tease, "Because of how _dapper_ I am."

"I said this one sweater made you look dapper," Claire felt warmth in her face as she smiled at him, "I spend time with you when you wear plenty of ugly sweaters."

"I suppose that means you are a good friend…" Remus tossed a larger pebble into the lake and the ripples made their way to the rocky shore. "Out of curiosity, which of them are ugly? I'm feeling very aware of the clothes I'm wearing suddenly."

"Don't worry," Claire crossed her ankles beneath the bench and shifted in her seat, "It's not many, most of the time you look very nice."

"Yeah?"

"Yes," Claire looked out across the lake and avoided looking in Remus' direction. It was as if a dam had been opened in her brain and she no longer had any control over the words she was saying. "I will go through your wardrobe before you go on any dates though, just to make sure you are looking your best."

She hoped her comment would shift the topic of the conversation away from herself. Her intention hadn't been to drag him out to the lake to talk about his fashion choices or the way his green eyes shone when he got excited about something. Frankly, she had invited him out to the lake so they could both read and enjoy the sunshine. A larger stone splashed into the water with a loud plop, Claire looked over at Remus.

"I don't think you'll be going through my wardrobe," He said grimly.

"What are you talking about?" Claire lightly nudged him with her elbow, "If you think I'd let you go out with any girl wearing that blue sweater that has holes in it, then you are sorely mistaken."

"I don't think," Remus paused to look around to make sure no other students were within earshot of them, once he felt sufficiently safe he continued to speak, "Any girls would be lining up to date me."

"Don't be silly," Claire reached over and placed her hand on his forearm, "Anyone would be lucky to have you."

"And what would be the point?" Remus pulled his arm away from her, leaving her fingers cold without the warmth of him beneath her, "Lie about having plans every full moon? Hope she doesn't ask questions about the new scars?"

"What if you were honest?" Claire scooted closer to him, feeling as though he couldn't pull away emotionally if she were physically near. "Would that be so horrible?"

"Would it be so bad?" Remus gave her a stern look, "You've read enough books at this point to know that being around me is dangerous. It's best if I don't even entertain the notion of dating… It's safer that way."

Claire could hear a tone of finality in his voice, it broke her heart to hear him say those words out loud. She had asked Sirius, James, and Peter many times how the wizarding world viewed werewolves, but they had seemed to collectively agree to be tight-lipped about it. All of the books she read related to social policy and werewolves had been old, she couldn't seem to find anything current during her searches. The lack of information from a usually chatty bunch gave her the impression that it was worse than she thought.

Remus was her dearest friend, he was the one she missed the most during the summers and the person she felt most comfortable confiding in. The idea that he would live out his life feeling isolated was not one that she could bear. A mixture of sadness and anger welled within her as she reached out and placed her hand in his.

"You were honest with me," Claire squeezed his hand with her slightly cold fingers, "And I still would rather be here with you than anywhere else."

"So, are you telling me," Remus looked deeply into her eyes as he spoke, Claire's heart began to race, "That even though you know…. That _you_ would date _me_?"

Claire looked at him, her heart fluttering away in her chest and her mouth completely dry. She opened her mouth to speak, but couldn't find any words in her head. Her entire mind had gone blank in that moment.

"Oy, Ludgrove!" Claire felt relief wash over her as Remus pulled his hand from out of her grip and created some space between them on the bench. She turned in the direction of the voice and saw Sirius and James walking briskly over to them, "Thought you outsmarted us, huh?"

Claire looked once again at Remus and tried her best to find the words to answer his question before they would be interrupted. Instead, she sat there next to him, staring blankly and feeling foolish. Remus looked at her, his eyes slowly losing the light behind them with every step closer that Sirius and James took. Finally, they arrived and James sat in the space between the two on the bench.

"There is no Charms homework," He pulled some chocolate frogs out of his pocket and began to eat them.

"How did you figure it out?" Claire was thankful to finally find her voice again, she watched as Sirius sat beneath the tree closest to them.

"We asked someone," Sirius motioned for James to throw him a chocolate frog.

"Who?"

"That pretty redhead who you share a room with, Evans," James mumbled with a mouth full of chocolate frogs.

"Pretty?" Claire raised her eyebrows and looked at Sirius for confirmation.

"Did I say pretty?" James backtracked, he threw another over to Sirius, "I meant pretty annoying."

"Don't worry," Sirius chuckled, "I don't think they'll be joining you and Remus on your _study dates_ anytime soon. She seemed extremely eager to get rid of us."

"She was enthusiastic about helping," James scowled over at Sirius, who chuckled.

"Only because it got rid of us faster," James hurled a chocolate frog at Sirius' head, he ducked out of the way.

"Where's Peter?" Remus asked curiously.

"He asked Evans for help with his Potions homework," Sirius leaned back against the tree and caught a chocolate frog easily with his left hand, "I think she's only helping him out of pity."

"What are you two up to?" James asked, changing the subject away from Lily.

"We were about to play some Exploding Snap," Remus pulled some cards out of his pocket and Claire felt a weight lift off of her shoulders. The uncomfortable conversation they had been having before seemed to have passed and now they could continue on as usual. Although she was generally unhappy when Sirius and James interrupted her, today she was extremely grateful. A distraction meant she didn't have to answer the question that was still lingering in the back of her mind.

After multiple rounds of Exploding Snap, much to everyone's chagrin James won them all, Remus took on the challenge of teaching Sirius and James how to skip stones. Claire laughed heartily at them as Sirius cursed under his breath and watched stone after stone fall immediately through the surface of the lake. James was no better at skipping the stones, but after all of the Quidditch practices could throw the stones much further than anyone else could. He took the opportunity to turn it into a competition of who could throw the pebbles the farthest instead. As the sun got lower in the sky, they decided to pick up their belongings and walk back to the castle for dinner.

Claire collected the cards from on the bench and handed them to Remus, her fingers briefly brushing up against his. He muttered a thank you quietly and pulled his hand away from her before placing himself between Sirius and James on the way back up to the castle. Claire watched the three of them for a moment and felt her heart drop. Although she couldn't pinpoint anything in particular, it seemed as though everything had changed.

Maybe her mother had been wrong, maybe it wasn't the words that you said that needed to be so carefully selected. Maybe it was more than that. Claire had a feeling that the words you didn't say were as powerful as those you did. She tucked her hair behind her ears and promised herself that she would talk to Remus later, she wouldn't let her own silence cause a rift to grow between them.

"What's the delay?" Sirius stopped walking and turned around to yell at her.

"Coming!" Claire took off after them at a quick pace. Tomorrow, that's when she would talk to Remus. No point in bringing it up today. She repeated to herself the words she wanted to say to him as she walked back up to the castle, knowing deep down that when tomorrow came she never would be brave enough to verbalize them.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Remus tossed the last couple socks from his drawer into his trunk for the winter break. He glanced over at James' trunk which was practically empty and Peter's that was stuffed to the brim. Although he wouldn't necessarily admit it out loud, he would miss his friends and their mischief during their short break. This year he was, fortunately, able to go home to be with his family for the holidays, the next full moon wouldn't be until after he got back to school. His mother was thrilled that he would be able to join them, she was even planning on making his favorite meal for his first night back.

"You better get packing," Remus lobbed the comment over his shoulder to James who was lying lazily on his bed, "We leave early tomorrow morning."

"There's plenty of time," James said with a yawn, "No need to rush."

"Should I bring my textbooks with me?" Peter asked, more to himself than anyone else.

"No," James responded, "Quite honestly, I'd suggest burning them."

"I think you'll be fine without them," Remus interjected, "I definitely wouldn't take any suggestions from James."

"Noted," Peter smirked.

"Where's Sirius?" Remus hadn't seen him since their last class and he was beginning to worry about what kind of trouble he could possibly be getting into. Although he didn't mind some of the pranks they played, he would much rather if James and Sirius behaved themselves more frequently. Honestly, it was a bit embarrassing to be around them when they felt the need to show off.

"Last I saw him," James finally stood and tossed some sweaters into his trunk, "He told me he was going to take the long way back to the Common Room to avoid that second-year girl who has been his shadow all week."

"I thought I saw him walking with McKinnon," James shot Peter a look, unsure if what he was saying was accurate. "Near the library after class."

"McKinnon?" James chuckled, "I'm pretty sure if he was walking with her it might be some time before we see him around the Common Room again."

"Why's that?" This was the first Remus was hearing about this, he didn't think that Sirius had any interest in Marlene McKinnon. However, based on the way she looked directly through Remus if he stood between her and Sirius, he definitely thought she was interested in him.

"Word around the Common Room is," Peter closed his trunk and took a seat on his bed, "She's going to try to convince him to take her to Hogsmeade the first weekend back from break."

"That might take a while," James tossed _Quidditch Through the Ages_ into his trunk and it made a loud thud, "The only thing Sirius is interested in doing at Hogsmeade is going to Zonko's and eating his weight in candy from Honeydukes. I don't think McKinnon or any other girl really fits into those plans-"

"You won't believe," Sirius bounded into the room with a piece of paper in his hand, "The gem I found in the Common Room."

"What is it?" Peter asked, his curiosity peaked.

Sirius held up a sign-up sheet at arm's length in front of him. Remus squinted to get a good look, not sure why Sirius seemed to think it was so astounding.

"Sign up sheets?" James looked at him skeptically, "Don't tell me you are actually going to Hogsmeade with McKinnon… are you?"

"What? Who told you that?" Sirius' barking laughter carried through the room as James pointed at Peter.

"I saw her walking with you near the library."

"Trust me," Sirius chuckled some more, "McKinnon is nothing I can't handle. I bumped into her when I was avoiding that second year like you avoid Dragon Pox."

"So then why," James asked genuinely, "Are you holding up a sign-up sheet for the dueling club like it's some kind of important relic?"

"Take a look at the third name on the list."

Remus pulled the paper out of Sirius' hands, not sure if his eyes were deceiving him. There, in the impeccable handwriting he knew so well was the name Claire Ludgrove. James was peering over his shoulder with a huge grin on his face.

"Where is she?" Sirius was practically beaming with excitement over his find. Remus knew that James and Sirius would never intentionally hurt Claire, quite honestly he thought that if anyone other than the two of them made fun of her they'd probably hex them. However, sometimes they were relentless in their teasing. Claire never really let on if it bothered her, but Remus knew it bothered him.

"Remus?" James turned to him, hopeful that he would provide him with her location.

Although there were a couple of weeks after that fateful day at the lake that Claire and Remus avoided each other, everything was back to normal now. Remus had such a sense of relief when Claire finally sat next to him again in the Great Hall for breakfast, smiled at him, and opened the book in her hand. Even though no words were spoken, it seemed to be agreed upon that they would go back to how things were. She wouldn't be forced to answer the question, and he wouldn't have to acknowledge that he had asked it.

On occasion though, Remus would pull out his grey sweater to wear. With a smile on his face, he would watch the blush work its way across her cheeks. Although he did wonder what her answer would have been if they hadn't been interrupted, he knew that the possibility of rejection was not worth satisfying his curiosity. Their friendship was too precious to him to risk again.

"I thought she was spending some time with Lily," Remus handed the paper back to Sirius, "She should be coming back to the Common Room soon if she isn't already back."

"Great," Sirius walked toward the door, "I say we wait for her there."

The Common Room was relatively empty, most students were in their respective rooms packing before dinner. As the boys reached the bottom of the stairs, the portrait hole swung open and in waltzed Claire and Lily. Remus had noticed they were much closer friends now than they had been before Claire and Remus' hiatus. Claire was laughing at something Lily had said when she spotted James and Sirius standing with their hands behind their backs.

"I suppose I'll head back to our room," Lily said adjusting the bag on her shoulder.

"Rushing off so soon, Evans?" James ruffled the back of his hair quickly, "Afraid if you stay for too long the popularity might rub off on you?"

"James!" Claire gave him a warning look.

"No," Lily shot back at him with a glare, "I'm concerned that if I spent any more time with you than I have to my I.Q. will lower just from proximity."

"I will meet you in the room in a moment," Claire threw her hand over James' mouth before he could come up with a retort. Lily shook her head in disbelief that Claire chose to spend time with them and then made her way up the stairs to the girls' dormitory without another comment. "What do you two want this time?"

"Is that how you greet your best friends?" Sirius gave her an exaggerated innocent look which she rolled her eyes at.

"That's how I greet my annoying friends,"

"You will miss me, don't deny it," James took a seat in the nearest armchair as he spoke.

"I will miss you for a moment," Claire looked skeptically at them, "Then I will remember how peaceful silence is and I will stop missing you."

"You'll get bored,"

"No, I assure you I won't," Claire adjusted the bag on her shoulder and looked over at Remus who she gave a small smile. "There is plenty to do in this castle without you, I will be more than occupied."

"So," Sirius pulled the paper out from behind his back and held it up for her to see, "Is that why you signed up for dueling club? To keep yourself occupied?"

"Those sign up sheets aren't for you to just take down," Claire snatched it out of his hand and walked back over to the notice board before pushing a pin into the paper he had stolen.

"It's not really the type of activity I pictured you doing," James shouted across the room at her, "If they had a book club… sure. I didn't think you had it in you to duel."

"Dueling is an important skill to have," Claire shrugged at his comment.

"I'm not buying it," Sirius pointed at Claire, "You've never had an interest in dueling before." He looked at Remus for confirmation.

"Leave me out of it," Remus sat on the couch, raising his hands up in defeat.

"The interests I have can change," Claire flipped her hair over her shoulder, her blue eyes shone brightly as she spoke.

"There is a Charms club," James started pointing to each of his fingers as he listed off the options, "Slughorn has his little club, one for magical creatures, one for Astronomy, clubs for collecting cards and gobstones… All of those seem like a better fit for you than dueling."

"I don't really think you have the stomach for a duel," Sirius added with a smirk on his face, knowing he was goading her, "No offense."

"I would duel you in a heartbeat, Sirius Black," Claire practically growled at him, "Besides, the point of the club is to learn about it. I should know how to duel properly."

"Why?" Sirius chuckled, "For all of those enemies you encounter in the library?"

"To make sure Sirius doesn't steal the toast off of your plate anymore?" James joined in.

Claire sighed and reached into her bag, she pulled out clippings of the Daily Prophet and placed them on the coffee table in front of James' armchair. The segments of paper spread out, some of them were large and others were small. Remus peered at them and noticed she had underlined small bits of information in each of the columns she had clipped.

"This is why I want to learn to duel properly," Claire pointed at the bits of paper and then looked at James. "I know you're not oblivious to what's happening out there."

For once, James didn't say anything. Remus looked at the columns again, in each of them a person was being reported missing or found dead. Their professors weren't talking much about it, but the atmosphere of the school was beginning to shift. Those with wizarding families were starting to worry, and students who were Muggleborn were mostly oblivious unless their friends clued them in. Dark wizards were gaining traction, one dark wizard in particular.

"They're all Muggle-borns…" Claire looked at Sirius, daring him to make fun of her again, "Everyone that is missing or dead, they are Muggle-born… I need to know how to defend myself in a more practical way because I don't think this is going to change anytime soon."

"They're all adults," James said in a calm voice, "Some of them are Aurors. You're safe here at Hogwarts, there's no reason to worry."

"Declan Murray, 20, Misuse of Muggle Artifacts… Maybel Wittman, 45, second string Chaser for the Holyhead Harpies… Indira Duffy, 32, a waitress at the Leaky Cauldron… all from Muggle families."

"Where's the sign-up sheet?" Remus stood and looked at Claire, she pointed in the direction of the notice board. "We're all signing up. You're not dueling anyone alone, we are all with you."

Remus, Sirius, James, and Peter passed the sign-up around and each scribbled their name directly below Claire's.

* * *

Sirius wandered down to the Great Hall sleepily, even though most of his friends had gone home for the holidays, he had still managed to stay up way later than he had intended. Since Claire was the only other third year Gryffindor he knew who was staying at the castle for the holidays, she took the break as an opportunity to spend as much time as possible their first evening doing research in the Restricted Section. Even though Sirius had begged him not to, James had left his invisibility cloak for them to use.

Claire seemed relentless in her goal of sucking all of the fun out of their short break. If Sirius wanted any kind of relief, he was going to need to sneak into the Great Hall, eat breakfast alone, and hide somewhere she wouldn't find him until the day was done. Otherwise, he might risk spending the entire day in the library with what was clearly his least fun friend. Sirius made his way into the Great Hall and nearly stopped in his tracks. Sitting there at the end of the Gryffindor table was Claire, with a book in hand.

She looked up and smiled at him. Now that he was spotted there was no getting out of whatever academic plan she had for the day. Maybe he should have taken James up on his offer to stay with the Potters for the holidays. Hell, he probably should have convinced Peter to take him to stay with the Pettigrew family.

Sirius had spent every Christmas at Hogwarts, it usually was a great time to look for new hidden passageways and plot out pranks for the rest of the school year. This was the first year Claire would be staying for the holidays. He hadn't realized it until it was too late to change his plans. Now he was stuck with her, just her, for an entire week before James, Remus, or Peter were back to offer him any kind of relief.

"Morning," Claire seemed relatively cheery for someone who got the same small amount of sleep that Sirius had. He grunted in response and plopped down into the seat across from her.

There were only a handful of students staying in the castle for the holidays. That meant the Great Hall was eerily quiet. Large Christmas trees were stationed throughout the room and a variety of baubles and twinkling candles were on them. Ornate wreaths hung from the furthest wall and a steady snow could be seen falling outside. Christmas at Hogwarts was far better than any holiday Sirius had ever had at home.

"Pass the bacon," Sirius grumbled, scooping large quantities of scrambled eggs onto his plate. Claire slid the platter of bacon over to him with a smile on her face.

"I'm glad you're up," Claire sipped on some tea quietly, "I wanted to figure out the plan for today."

"Does there have to be a plan?" Sirius muttered, stuffing some bacon into his mouth hungrily.

"How else are we going to decide what to do with our day?" Sirius glared at her, unwilling to dignify that question with an answer. It was a holiday, they should be relaxing. He knew that Claire really enjoyed being in the library at all hours of the day, but it wasn't exactly what relaxed him. "I wasn't aware you were so opposed to planning things. You seem incredibly engaged with plans if they involve pranking someone."

"I'm less opposed to plans than I am spending this whole week in the library,"

"It's Christmas Eve!" Claire looked at him shocked, "This is the first Christmas Eve in my entire life that I haven't had to spend all day at a church. I want to do something fun!"

Sirius perked up, but only slightly. He wasn't sure what Claire's version of fun was. He didn't want to risk being optimistic this early in the conversation. "What did you have in mind?"

"I'm not sure…" Claire gingerly picked up her toast and took a small bite, chewing thoughtfully, "I was hoping you'd have some suggestions."

Brilliant.

"Me?" Sirius smiled over at her, "You want me to pick what we do today?"

"Yes," Claire beamed at him, "I thought, as a gift to you, we could do whatever you wanted today. I know it's a day early, but… Happy Christmas!"

A pang of guilt settled in Sirius' chest. He had just been thinking about how she was no goodness she wasn't able to read his mind. Claire may have been more boring than Sirius, but she was clearly the far superior friend. He would have typically hated that she was showing him up, but he was so thrilled about spending the day doing whatever he wanted that he ignored it.

Sirius had been nothing but grumpy with her since the moment he spotted her this morning, now she was giving him free reign to choose their activities for the day. She was happily giving up all control as a gift to him. What made it worse was knowing that he hadn't gotten her anything for Christmas in return. Sirius promised himself that in order to make it up to her, he would do everything possible to make sure she enjoyed herself this week.

"Well," Sirius placed his fork down to give the conversation his full attention, "Just to be clear, I get to pick all of the activities and you get to have no objections to them?"

"Yes," Claire rested her elbows on the table and chuckled, "That's right. You get complete control over our day. If you said we would sit in the Common Room in our pajamas and eat candy all day, that's what we would do."

"Perfect," Sirius smirked, running through a list of activities in his head, "Eat up, then. I have a feeling it's going to be a long day."

After finishing their breakfast, Sirius and Claire walked back up to the Gryffindor dorms to change into warmer clothes. Sirius had decided that the best way to start their day was to wander out into the snow. Claire taught him what a snow angel was and she used some of her impeccable magic to create a rather large snowman. Sirius pelted some snowballs at her and then chased her around the grounds as she laughed loudly.

When their robes were sufficiently damp and they were tired, Sirius showed her the different secret passageways that he used. To her credit, not once did Claire mention the rules that using the passageways broke. She even pointed out a new passageway he had never seen before behind a large coat of armor. They wandered together toward the end of it to find themselves in a broom closet next to the Charms classroom.

Sirius snuck her into the kitchens to grab some sandwiches for lunch. Claire thanked all of the house elves profusely for the food and Sirius had to practically drag her from the room to move on to their next activity. The duo spent some time under James' invisibility cloak pranking Peeves who couldn't see them but could only hear them (Claire's idea but Sirius was happy to let her choose one activity). Finally, they ended up back in the Common Room to play some games. After Sirius won at chess twice in a row, he taught her how to play Gobstones. Claire squealed the first time liquid shot from the stone in her direction, Sirius chuckled as she moved the rest of her stones incredibly hesitantly from that point on.

As the evening approached, they switched back to Exploding Snap. Claire had really begun to improve her skill in the game. Sirius provided her with some tips as they played, knowing it was much more satisfying to win a game when he had some legitimate competition. When she won her first round, Sirius laughed as he watched her take an actual victory lap around the empty Common Room and then throw herself on the couch he was sitting on.

"This has been the greatest Christmas Eve," Claire sighed contentedly, "Thank you."

"I should be thanking you," Sirius watched as she levitated a card up into the air with a flick of her wand, "Today may have been one of the best gifts I have ever gotten."

"You're welcome," Claire smiled at him and then watched as the card fluttered toward the ground, "I wish we could do this all of the time."

"We could," Sirius nudged her with his elbow, "You spent an entire day without stepping foot in the library. I'm pretty sure it hasn't collapsed upon itself without you."

"... I can't." The smile faded from her face.

"Oh come on!" Sirius turned to face her, "Today was great, I know that you had fun even if it meant breaking some rules and not worrying about homework."

"Sirius-"

"How fun would it be to do stuff like this," He motioned around the Common Room at the scattered games and candy wrappers, "Everyday?"

"It's not that I don't think it's fun to do this…"

"Then why do you keep yourself holed up in the library all of the time?"

"You've seen my home life," Claire sighed and glanced over at Sirius for a moment before beginning to play with her hair, "When I go home I'm always forced to pretend that none of this exists. I just want to do well… so I don't have to go back to pretending."

Sirius took a moment to look at her as she concentrated on the fire. Even though they came from very different families, he understood what it felt like to have your family wish they could change you. Sirius' parents and Claire's father were more similar than he would like to admit. His parents disliked Muggles and her father felt that magic was evil. Sirius felt uncomfortable that she wasn't allowed to talk about magic while she was home during the summers, but what he most despised was that her father made her feel like something was wrong with her because she was a witch.

"You won't have to," Sirius reassured her, "I promise."

His stomach let out a growl, Claire giggled at him and stood while stretching her arms above her head.

"Let me guess," Claire's eyes shone brightly as she spoke, "Your next plan is that we go to dinner."

"You're quite the genius."

* * *

Christmas morning was soon upon them, and Sirius was pleased to see a small pile of gifts at the bottom of his bed when he woke in the morning. He opened the wrappings to see some candy from Remus, a Sneakoscope from Peter, and a two-way mirror from James. After realizing what the mirror did, he had a short conversation with James using it. Although he was tempted to mention the fun he had been having with Claire, he chose to keep it to himself.

He did miss spending time with James but, he had really been enjoying having time with just Claire. Something about this week of freedom, freedom from classes, spellwork, and her parents, seemed to loosen her up. He knew that the person she was this week was too good to be true, so he felt the need to keep it between himself and Claire. As soon James, Remus, and Peter would return and she would go back to nagging and raising her hand excessively during class. Sirius would enjoy this week with her while he could.

After listening to James talk about the relatives he had seen during his break and the gifts he had gotten from his parents, Sirius finally rolled out of bed and pulled on his clothes. Claire, who was usually an early riser, would probably be waiting for him in the Common Room. The dormitory was quiet, only a few students had stayed this holiday and the handful that did stay were either still asleep or already down at breakfast. Sirius lounged in an armchair and fiddled with the Sneakoscope in his hands.

He heard some footsteps and looked up to see Claire standing at the top of the stairs. She was dressed in a way that Sirius had never seen before, a simple but pretty dark red dress with long sleeves covered her slender frame and as she came around the corner he caught the sight of a bow tied in the back barely peeking out from under her long wavy hair. Her blue eyes shone brightly as she bounded down the stairs and over to him. Sirius stood and glanced at her, unsure of what to say.

"Happy Christmas," Claire stepped forward and gave him a tight hug before timidly stepping away. They weren't usually the hugging type of friends, "I hope you weren't waiting too long."

"No, I wasn't."

"My mum sent me this dress," She moved slightly and the hem of the dress danced around her knees, "I really wanted to try it on."

"It's.. nice."

"You don't have to pretend to be interested in my clothes," Claire shook her head.

"Do you like it?" Sirius didn't really know much about fashion, but he figured the most important part was that she was happy.

"I do," Her eyes were sparkling as she spoke, "My mum has always gotten me a new dress to wear for Christmas. I thought this year she might not, since I stayed here… but I woke and there was a parcel from her at the end of my bed."

"I'm glad you like it." Sirius added, "You look lovely." Claire smiled at his comment.

They spent most of the morning hanging around the Common Room, playing games and munching on candy. Sirius barely had to let Claire win Exploding Snap anymore, she had really improved since Remus had first taught her. Maybe there was hope that James wouldn't continue to be the reigning champion. When they got hungry, they agreed to wander down to breakfast.

As they approached the Great Hall, Sirius noticed someone skulking by the entranceway. He could feel his jaw clench as he realized that Severus Snape was standing in the shadows of the doorway. Claire reached over to touch Sirius' forearm and gave him a pleading look. Even though every fiber of his being told him to hex Snape into an oblivion, he wasn't about to screw up the perfectly good rapport he had been building with Claire. If she wanted him to be on good behavior, he would manage to do that at least while she was around to witness it.

Snape looked up as they approached and glared at both of them. Everything about Snape bugged Sirius, his greasy hair, his smug face, the innate interest in the Dark Arts. When he looked at his sneering face, Sirius was reminded of the awful members of his family. Sirius reached out to place his hand on Claire's elbow to lead her away as quickly as possible, but her arm was nowhere to be found.

"Happy Christmas, Severus," Sirius' eyes darted around until he realized that instead of walking into the Great Hall, Claire had veered off toward the location where Snape was standing. He swore under his breath, one of these days her intense need to be friendly was going to get her into an awful situation that he couldn't save her from.

Although he wanted to get as far away from Snape as possible before his desire to hex him became too intense to control, Sirius couldn't bear the thought of leaving her alone with him. Claire seemed to think that he was harmless, but Sirius knew what people like him were capable of. He knew the snide comments that Snape's classmates made about Claire when she raised her hand during Potions. Allowing her to be alone with him meant risk of her hearing something hateful or with a jinx thrown at her back as she turned to leave.

Snape glared at Claire and refused to acknowledge her. Sirius could begin to feel his anger rising. He could understand Snape's hatred of himself and James, but Claire had been nothing but nice to him from the first day of their first year. Even though Claire tried to hide it, Sirius could tell that she was hurt by his dismissal.

"She wished you a Happy Christmas, Snivellus," Sirius barked at him, "Do I need to clean your ears out for you?"

"I heard her," Snape glared at both of them. Claire tugged on Sirius' sleeve, indicating that she was ready to leave.

"So you're just choosing to be rude then?" Sirius stood rooted to his spot, no one was going to ruin Claire's Christmas, not if he had anything to say about it.

"She doesn't deserve my response,"

"Come on, Sirius," Claire tugged on his sleeve again, harder this time, "I said what I wanted to, let's go get breakfast-"

"That's where you're wrong Snape," Sirius was seething with anger at this point, "You don't deserve her kindness you snivelling pile of dung."

"Please, stop," Claire begged, standing between Sirius and Severus, "It's Christmas. We are both hungry, let's just forget it and go eat. This was my mistake, let's just drop it."

"Fine," Sirius felt his fists continue to clench as he walked away from Snape and into the Great Hall. "Couldn't you have just ignored him?"

"I can't be mean to him,"

"I'm not asking you to be mean," Sirius looked at her, "Just that you don't talk to him."

"It's Christmas," Claire looked serious for a moment, "He was standing there alone, I just thought… I thought if there was any day to extend some kindness it would be today."

Her heart was too big for her own good. She was much sweeter and more forgiving than even the truest Hufflepuffs he had met. How she could go out of her way to be kind even to the most despicable was nothing short of sainthood. Claire somehow managed to be kind to someone who was rude to her consistently, but she would have a short fuse with Sirius when he asked to borrow her homework. It was completely backward if you asked him.

His mind was still racing, he desperately wanted to turn on his heel and head back to Snape to teach him a lesson. Claire would never willingly let him go back though. Suddenly, an idea popped into his head. "I just remembered, I didn't get to show you the mirror James sent me. I'm sure he'd want to wish you a Happy Christmas… I'm going to run back to the Common room and get it. Save me some sausage and eggs?"

Claire looked suspiciously at him, but after appraising him for a moment, nodded and took her usual seat at the Gryffindor table. Sirius let out a sigh of relief and took calm steps toward the doorway to not raise her suspicions further. As soon as he stepped over the threshold, he moved to his left so he was out of sight and grabbed Snape by the collar.

"Let me be perfectly clear," Sirius shoved him up against the stone wall and watched as Snape flinched in pain, "If you so much as look at Claire the wrong way and I hear about it, I will hex you until you can't see straight."

"Look at you," Snape had a triumphant smile on his face, "The blood traitor protecting the Mudblood, how poetic."

"I've been holding back with you, Snivellus," Sirius drew his wand from his pocket and pressed it hard against Snape's cheek, "Claire isn't here to ask me to stop or beg me to leave you alone. Do you want to really see what I'm capable of?"

"It's sweet how much you care about her-"

"I don't think you need knees," Sirius growled, "Let's fix that… shall we?"

"You think you're so clever," Snape snapped back at him, "Threatening me with hexes and insulting me. You're way easier to manipulate than you realize-"

"Or maybe I should fix that ugly mug of yours," Sirius gripped his collar tighter, "A stinging jinx would do perfectly."

"Jinx me and see what happens," Sirius paused and appraised him, his attempt at threatening him was rather unsuccessful, "'It would be such a shame if your little Mudblood friend was hexed on her way to the library or heading back to the Common Room."

"You dare touch her-"

"Oh, I don't need to," Snape had a cruel smile on his face, "There are plenty of others who would be happy to send the message to someone like her that she's not welcome here."

"I won't be threatened by you," Sirius let go of his collar and stepped away from him, "You don't scare me Snivellus."

"I thought I was clear," Snape said coldly, "I'm not threatening _you_."

* * *

 **Author's Note: I just wanted to take a quick moment to thank everyone for the follows, favorites, and reviews. It really means a lot to me that anyone is taking the time to read this story. I have a lot of ideas and I'm really excited for where it's going. Thanks for joining me on this crazy ride, I hope to keep you entertained for a long while!**


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Claire prided herself on excelling in almost all of her spellwork, the one course that didn't come naturally to her was Care of Magical Creatures. At this point in the year, she had forgotten why she had even wanted to sign up for it. It had seemed like such a good idea at the time, learning about the creatures she had always been told only existed in fantasy stories. Now though, as she sat next to Sirius and peered into a box filled with what could only be described as stick-men with sharp fingers and beady eyes, she had forgotten all about the excitement she had prior to registering for the course.

"Bowtruckles," Professor Kettleburn projected his voice over the group of third-year students, "Have their distinctive appearance to provide them with camouflage as they protect their Wiggentree."

The Bowtruckles in the box closest to her were looking up hesitantly, shifting their position quickly with any small movement that she made. She prayed silently that they wouldn't have to handle them. The fear of getting scratched, poked at, or dropping one was the only thing she could seem to focus on.

"This afternoon," Kettleburn started to walk amongst the group of students while speaking, "You will be diagramming the Bowtruckles, work in partners and handle your Bowtruckle with care. They are relatively mild-mannered creatures, but if you startle them they will give you a nasty scratch."

A hum of voices moved throughout the group as the students began to pair off to begin their classwork. Claire looked hesitantly again at the box of Bowtruckles, unsure how she was going to possibly handle one.

"You managed the Fire Crabs last week," Claire looked over her shoulder and noticed Sirius standing behind her, "I'm sure you'll be fine with a tiny Bowtruckle."

"You mostly handled the Fire Crab," Claire responded, feeling a wave of relief wash over her. His sudden presence must mean that he hadn't abandoned her as a partner just yet. If this were any other class, she would most likely be working with any other unpartnered peer. However, James chose to take Divination with Peter ("I can just make up predictions, it will be so simple!") and Remus was off in Arithmancy on his own. That left Sirius and Claire in Care of Magical Creatures together. Up until this point, Claire had been Sirius' partner for most class work by default. "I stood there hiding behind a rock as it shot flames at me when I moved."

"True," Sirius smirked at her, clearly reveling in her lack of skill with magical creatures, "You excelled with the flobberworms though."

"There's not much to excel in," Claire sighed, disappointed in herself.

"Don't say that," Sirius joked, a grin on his face, "You were a flobberworm genius. They ate just the right amount when you fed them."

"Oh shut up," Claire muttered, looking at the Bowtruckles again in frustration. She couldn't let one more class go by in which she relied on Sirius to do most of the heavy work. It was a point of pride now.

"If you get the parchment ready," Sirius said, dropping his joking tone and developing a plan for the rest of the class, "I can wrangle a Bowtruckle over to that spot under the tree. Then you can do most of the diagramming while I do the handling."

"Are you sure?" Claire looked at him hesitantly, feeling as though this was going to be held over her head later, "I don't want to force you to do all of the handling."

"I'm lousy at drawing," Sirius began to pull on a pair of gloves to prepare to handle the Bowtruckle, "You're really doing me a favor."

Claire had a feeling he was just saying this to make her feel better. Professor Kettleburn wasn't grading them on their skill at drawing, what was most important was labeling the anatomy correctly and handling the Bowtruckle. Regardless, she dropped the conversation and picked up a couple pieces of parchment and grabbed her bag before settling under the nearest tree. She watched from a distance as Sirius smoothly dipped his hand into the box and came up with a small Bowtruckle in his grasp. Claire noticed that he was quietly talking, almost in a reassuring way, to the creature as he slowly made his way over to her.

The cool February air moved through the group of students, causing many to huddle closer together for warmth. Fortunately, the tree Claire was under was mostly shielded from the wind and took much of the briskness out of the air. Sirius sat down next to her and held the Bowtruckle up for her to examine.

"See? Nothing to be afraid of," Sirius moved the Bowtruckle closer to her and it raised its sharp fingers up in defense of her approaching face. Claire reached out hesitantly and the small creature took a swipe at her, she barely moved her hand out of the way in time.

"For you," Claire muttered as she shifted a few inches further away from Sirius, "This seems to come so easily to you."

"The creatures can just tell that you're nervous," Sirius said confidently, he reached out a finger to the Bowtruckle and it just looked over at him quietly, "You need to be calmer and more confident when you handle them."

"Let's just get this over with," Claire adjusted the parchment under a large textbook she had brought with her and began to sketch out an image of the Bowtruckle. As she moved along, Sirius pointed out to her some of the features and their respective names. Claire was only able to pepper in some information she had read before class. Her theoretical knowledge of Care of Magical Creatures was good, she just was useless at the practical aspect of it.

"I think that was the last part," She looked over their diagram quickly to make sure they didn't miss anything.

"Great," Sirius smiled over at her, "What's left then is you handling the Bowtruckle."

"What?"

"Put some gloves on," Sirius tilted his head in the direction of the spare gloves that were sitting next to him.

"Sirius, this is a bad idea!"

"I have all day," Sirius chuckled, "Unlike you, I'm okay with skipping the rest of my classes. I would suggest if you want to go to Herbology today, you put those gloves on."

Claire frowned and shoved the gloves onto her hands angrily. It was humiliating every time Sirius encouraged her to handle a creature. Not because his encouragement was embarrassing, but because it was a complete failure every time. At this point, she would have been fine with doing all of the academics if he did all of the handling. However, he seemed to have different plans.

With the gloves on, she looked over to him for some kind of guidance on what to do. Sirius slowly began to move his hand with the Bowtruckle out toward her. The creature still held it's fingers up defensively as it approached her.

"I want you to reach out and put your hand on mine," Sirius spoke in a calm and collected voice as he focused on what he was doing. Claire envied his composure, she felt as though she was going to be sick. When Sirius' arm was fully extended, Claire slowly reached out and placed her hand around Sirius'. "Now, I'm going to move my grip. I want you to then transition to holding him yourself."

"I don't know about this," Claire could feel her nerves getting the best of her.

"Do you trust me?"

"Yes…" Claire met Sirius' eyes for a moment, before looking away. It was odd to admit aloud that she trusted him. Even though Sirius had been her friend for a long time, this was the first time she was admitting her inherent trust in him. Something about that made her feel incredibly vulnerable.

"Good…" Sirius paused and began to move his hand, "Everything is going to be fine. Just stay calm."

"Sirius…" Claire's voice sounded higher pitched than it usually did, panic changing the tone completely. She could now feel the tiny moving creature in her own hand, she bit her lip from nerves.

"Trust me," He said calmly, slowly transferring the tiny wiggling Bowtruckle from his hand to hers. After some careful maneuvering, Claire finally had her hand surrounding the Bowtruckle on her own.

"I did it!" She exclaimed in the calmest and quietest voice she could muster so that she didn't startle the creature.

"I told you," Sirius rested his hand on hers to provide some support, she looked up at him and noticed a gentle light behind his eyes as he smiled at her. Something about the feel of his hand wrapped around hers and the smile on his face made her feel an odd sensation in her stomach.

"What do I do now?"

"Now," Sirius used his other hand to slowly adjust her grip so he held the Bowtruckle once more, "You thank me and offer me all the help I want on my upcoming History of Magic essays."

Claire chuckled and rolled up the parchment with the Bowtruckle diagram on it. "You are quite the natural in this class, do you know that?"

"Careful," Sirius looked at the Bowtruckle fondly while speaking to her, "It sounded like you complimented me. If you keep that up, people may start to think you've gone soft."

"We wouldn't want that," Claire smiled at him but noticed that he was incredibly distracted. She followed his gaze to see him looking in the direction of Severus Snape. When Claire looked in Snape's direction he looked away suddenly very intrigued by the creature his partner was holding. Claire turned back around and examined Sirius. His eyes were cold and distant, none of the warmth he had previously had could be seen. "Sirius?"

"Yes?" His attention was focused on her again as if he had not completely slipped away into another world for a few moments. "Sorry, I got distracted."

"By Snape?"

"I was just keeping an eye on him," Sirius adjusted his fingers to get a better hold on the Bowtruckle that was now beginning to attempt to wriggle free from his grasp. "He hasn't approached you recently has he?"

"No…" Claire looked over her shoulder at Snape briefly, "Why would he? We aren't friends and I'm quite certain he hates me."

"You'll tell me if he does?"

"Sirius, what's going on?" Sirius shrugged at her question, "Don't dismiss me like that, I can tell that something is wrong. You just aren't telling me what it is."

"Nothing is wrong," Sirius chuckled, but only halfheartedly, "You're being paranoid. I just like to keep tabs on Snivelly, I always have."

"You've never worried about him talking to me before,"

"He's not to be trusted," Sirius added nonchalantly, "I would hate for you to get caught in the crosshairs because of your friendship with James and I…. That's all."

Claire considered that for a moment. It could be true, she would completely believe it that Severus would act out against her in retaliation of James and Sirius' bullying. There was something about Sirius' nervous behavior that made her feel like he was keeping something from her. Unlike with Remus, she knew she had no hope of prying the information out of him though.

"Promise me you're not planning something stupid," Claire shifted herself so that she was directly in his eye line. Sirius looked up, his gray eyes boring into hers. She thought she could detect a flicker of emotion in his face before he laughed and looked away.

"You worry too much," Sirius stood to bring the Bowtruckle back to the box he had gotten it from, "I'm not some child you need to look after."

Her heart sank and she felt resentment building in her chest. It was so typical of Sirius to minimize her feelings and deflect the subject, then leave before she had a chance to send a retort in his direction. Maybe he was right, maybe she worried too much. Her gut told her that this wasn't just a worry led by fear of rule breaking or attention-seeking impulsiveness. Something about the emptiness behind Sirius' eyes didn't sit right with her.

"That's not a promise," She muttered quietly to herself as she watched him walk away.

* * *

Remus leaned back in his chair, silently hoping that he had enough energy to make it through this class. The first day back after the full moon was always the toughest and unfortunately for him, Transfiguration was a course you couldn't really afford to zone out. If he had History of Magic today, then he would have had some time to potentially nap. He looked over at James who was tapping his foot under his desk in an attempt to keep himself awake.

Even though his friends hadn't figured out a way to be with him during his transformation, they had started to show up at the Shrieking Shack as soon as the first sign of dawn appeared in the sky. That way Remus wouldn't be alone during the moments after transforming back into a human. James, Sirius, and Peter would help apply the potions from Madam Pomfrey and get him squared away before he took his sleeping draught. Although Claire desperately wanted to be there, Remus had convinced her it would be better to leave the more gruesome aspects to the others. He couldn't bear the idea of her looking at him in tattered blood stained clothes with open wounds.

Peter yawned and his eyes glazed over as Professor McGonagall stopped lecturing and began to write on the chalkboard with the flick of her wand. Sirius was fiddling with his parchment, folding and refolding the corner of it to keep himself occupied. All of them were sufficiently distracted, except for Claire. It seemed as though the only way she could cope with not helping Remus was by throwing herself even more deeply into her schoolwork and extracurricular research.

Claire sat next to Mary MacDonald who was glancing over her shoulder at the copious amounts of notes that Claire seemed to be taking. Mary looked up and noticed Remus' gaze, she smiled slightly and then tapped Claire with the end of her quill. Claire's face was irritated for a moment until she realized that Mary was pointing in Remus' direction. Her blue eyes locked with his and Remus couldn't control the smile that spread across his face.

"Becoming an Animagus," Professor McGonagall stated in her sharp voice as she turned around to face the class full of third year Gryffindors. "Is a long and arduous process. However, if the witch or wizard is precise and has sufficient motivation they will be greatly rewarded."

Claire had completely stopped taking notes and was attempting to soundlessly mouth sentences to Remus who hadn't a clue what she was trying to say. All he knew was he couldn't wait until class was done to be able to talk to her again. He shrugged to indicate that he was lost and she let out a small giggle.

"Miss Ludgrove," McGonagall walked over in Claire's direction and without missing a beat rapped her wand on her desk, "If you could kindly face forward and pay attention."

Remus could hear Sirius snickering from beside him. Claire was blushing fiercely as she turned to face McGonagall quickly.

"As you already seem to think you're an expert on this topic to have a side conversation during my class," McGonagall gave her a stern look, "Could you share with us the process of becoming an Animagus?"

Claire seemed sufficiently flustered, she avoided eye contact with her classmates and shook her head without a word. Sirius was shaking with laughter at this point, Remus kicked him in the shin. Sirius grunted and rubbed the spot Remus had kicked with an irritated look on his face. James had perked up and seemed very interested in the interaction between McGonagall and Claire.

"You don't know?" McGonagall turned back to the chalkboard and continued to write, "Then it's best you pay attention instead of talking to Mr. Lupin. Can anyone else tell me the process to become an Animagus?"

Lily's hand shot into the air. Next to her was Marlene McKinnon who was doodling on her paper and looking longingly over in Sirius' direction.

"Miss Evans,"

"Becoming an Animagus requires both Transfiguration as well as potion making," Lily's voice carried through the room easily, "To create the potion you need to hold the leaf of a Mandrake in your mouth for a month. After the potion is finished brewing, you must recite the proper incantation to yourself daily."

"Five points to Gryffindor," McGonagall smiled at her and Lily looked sheepish. James muttered something under his breath, "Something to add Mr. Potter?"

"Just that seems like a lot of work only to transform into an animal, Professor," James sat straighter in his seat when he was addressing McGonagall. "Wouldn't it be better to spend your time learning how to vanish things, conjure them, or anything else more useful than spending months learning to become say… a bunny rabbit?"

McGonagall seemed to entertain his question for a moment, appraising him carefully. Suddenly her body shifted as she rapidly changed from their professor into a tabby cat with black markings around its eyes very much like the glasses she typically wore. The class stared in awe for a moment while the cat whipped its tail back and forth, glancing at them all. Then as quickly as she had transformed into the cat, she changed back into a human.

"Bloody hell," Sirius said in awe.

"I suppose you could spend your time perfecting the skills you said were 'more useful', Mr. Potter," James' mouth hung open as he spoke to her, "However, if you apply yourself it is possible to be more than competent in Transfiguration as well as learn to be an Animagi."

"I need to learn how to do that," James leaned over and said quietly to Remus. He gave him a halfhearted smile. Remus had no interest in becoming an Animagi. He already became a wolf once a month, that was enough transformation for him for an entire lifetime.

* * *

Claire walked in the corridor with Mary after their relatively eventful Transfiguration class. She was thankful that Mary didn't bring up her blunder during the lecture. That was the first time she hadn't been able to answer when a professor questioned her about spellwork. She wasn't sure what had happened, all of the information that Lily volunteered shortly afterward Claire had studied the night before. Being caught not paying attention had drained all of the information from her brain.

"During Herbology yesterday," Mary said kindly while she adjusted the books in her hand, "Bertram Aubrey was asking me about you."

"Really?" Claire was perplexed, she could probably count on one hand the number of times she had talked to the Hufflepuff before. It wasn't that she didn't think he was nice, but she just wasn't particularly friendly with him. If she was being honest, she didn't really ever think of him, "What did he ask?"

"Nothing of interest," She had a knowing smile on her face, "Just the usual stuff. What you're interested in, if you like Quidditch... if you're dating James Potter."

"Excuse me?"

"Yes," Mary was laughing, "It seems that he got the idea because you spend a lot of time with him."

"Well, that's preposterous!" Claire rolled her eyes.

"I know," Mary nodded, "I told him that you're not. If you ask me, he seemed pretty relieved to hear it."

"Oh?" Claire feigned interest. She wasn't particularly enthused about the direction this conversation was heading.

"It seems as though you've caught his interest," Mary seemed excited to be sharing this information, "He's a good looking lad, don't you think?"

"I suppose," Claire couldn't help but feel as though Bertram Aubrey would be the last person she would want to date. He was good looking enough, but she wasn't sure what they would even talk about. Did he like books? Would he get on with her friends? Sure, you could find those things out on a date but that seemed like a lot of risk. He was a kind person, surely, but he was a bit too… boring.

"Unless you'd rather date someone else?" Mary was glancing at her suspiciously. Claire bit her tongue, Mary could be a bit of a gossip at times. They weren't that great of friends, so the idea of having a conversation with Mary about who she would date was quite honestly the last thing she wanted to do.

"I'm not interested in dating anyone," Claire lied, hoping that it would go undetected by her roommate.

"Well that's good news for Marlene," Mary laughed lightly, her blonde braid flipping over her shoulder, "That means she doesn't have any competition with Sirius."

"Best of luck to her," Claire shook her head, "If anyone can tolerate his complete lack of restraint, they deserve to date him."

Mary let out a snort while she laughed, "So… Not dating James, definitely not compatible with Sirius… there's no one you fancy then?"

"Why are you so suddenly interested in who I fancy?"

"I promised Bertram I'd report back to him," Claire shot her an offended look, "He's going to help me with my Herbology homework… I'm doing so poorly in that class."

"Can't you share gossip with him about someone else?"

"No," Mary seemed to be enjoying herself too much during this conversation, Claire was starting to wish she was already in their next class even if it meant taking profuse amounts of notes, "He specifically asked about you. I told him that you weren't dating James, but if he needed to watch out for anyone it would be Remus."

Claire felt as though her heart stopped. She tried her best to control her face as Mary searched her for any hint of a response.

"I told you," Claire spoke in a monotone voice, "I'm not interested in dating anyone."

As they turned the corridor, Claire spotted a group of Slytherins up ahead. There was something about the looks on their faces when they spotted the two girls that made her feel unsettled. She suddenly wished that the boys had walked with them instead of heading in the direction of the kitchens to grab a snack. Claire tried to make note of the closest professor to their location, however, they were all in their classrooms much further away than she would care for them to be at this moment. Mary must have also picked up on the change of atmosphere because she quickened her pace to pass the Slytherins as fast as possible.

When the girls went to proceed past the group, one Slytherin stepped out into their path. He was tall with shoulder length brown hair that was pulled back into a small ponytail. His features were sharp and his dark brown eyes had a playful glint behind them. Claire grabbed Mary's arm to guide her around him and another boy stepped out and blocked them. This one was much shorter and bulkier in stature with platinum blonde hair that hung in his face.

Claire's eyes darted around and she noticed Severus Snape in the group. He was standing in the back, not actively participating but not stopping what was clearly an ambush. She met his gaze and noticed what seemed to be a hint of remorse before he looked away. The tall boy pushed the books that were in Mary's hands out of her grip and onto the floor.

"Two Mudbloods walking unaccompanied," His voice was cruel as he spoke with a menacing smile on his face, "Don't your blood traitor friends know it's dangerous to leave you alone."

"Leave us be, Mulciber," Mary's voice was shaking slightly as she spoke, "I will call for a professor."

"We're terrified," The boy who Claire now knew was Mulciber said, "Aren't we Avery?"

Avery nodded and shoved Claire with his shoulder. She dropped her bag on the floor. Instead of reaching for it she pulled her wand from her pocket and gripped it tightly. The group laughed at her as she pointed her wand at them.

"Which spell are you planning on using?" Avery taunted, stepping closer to her and causing Claire to back into a wall. "Disarming? Stunning? None of that is useful, we know magic more powerful than you can even imagine in that tiny little Mudblood brain of yours."

Claire swallowed hard. She had learned how to duel properly, but that was with specific rules and under close supervision from their Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. Even if she had improved her skill, she wasn't sure that she could defend herself against someone who clearly was familiar with the Dark Arts.

"We've been waiting to test out some of these spells," Mulciber added while pointing his wand at Mary whose breathing had become much shallower, "Now seems like the perfect time with the perfect test subjects."

"I bet you're all talk," Claire said to him, hoping that if she could distract them long enough a professor would walk by, "You read one book about the Dark Arts and suddenly you think you're an expert."

"I will show you how much of an expert I am," Avery held his wand directly in her face, Claire suppressed the urge to wince as he did so, not wanting to give him the satisfaction in thinking he scared her.

"Leave her alone!" Mary lifted her wand and attempted to disarm Avery. From nerves, she missed and in the blink of an eye Avery flicked his wand and Mary's wand went clattering on the ground several feet away.

"You dare to disarm him?" Mulciber seemed enraged by this, his dark eyes narrowing as he looked at her. He lifted his wand up at Mary, "Crucio!"

Mary dropped to the ground and let out a blood-curdling scream. Claire attempted to rush to her aid but Avery shoved her against the wall knocking her head into the stone. She sunk to the ground clutching her head and feeling powerless. For what was a moment, but felt like an eternity to Claire, she watched as Mary writhed in pain and Mulciber and his friends laughed. Suddenly his wand went flying out of his hand and the screaming stopped.

Claire winced as she turned her head to see Sirius and James running full speed down the hallway toward them. The Slytherins took this as their cue to flee the scene. Claire stood quickly and took wobbly steps over to Mary who was laying on the ground with her eyes closed. She reached out, clutched her hand tightly, and tried to reassure her that everything would be okay.

"You both need to go to the hospital wing," Claire hadn't even noticed that James and Sirius had finally made their way to them.

"Take her," Claire motioned to Mary, "You're faster than me, I will just hold you back. Take her, James."

James didn't hesitate at all to reach down and pick her up. Claire was finally happy for all of the Quidditch practices he had gone to; he was strong enough to lift her and rush off down the hallway in the direction of the Hospital Wing. Sirius hunched over and looked at Claire carefully, he was still taking heavy breaths to recover from sprinting down the hallway.

"What did they do to you?" Sirius asked carefully.

"Nothing…" Claire leaned against the wall and could feel a pounding behind her forehead, "They just threatened me. Avery shoved me against the wall, I hit my head."

"Did Snape touch you?"

"No…" Claire felt as though her head was spinning. Why was he asking about Snape specifically? It was difficult to think clearly. "No, he just stood there. It was Avery and Mulciber."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, positive."

"Did they say anything?" Claire debated how to answer his question. She knew that telling him that they had called her a Mudblood would mean he would plan retaliation. Most likely that retaliation would be aimed at Snape since he seemed to be an easy target for Sirius and James.

"...No."

Sirius appraised her, Claire was sure he knew she was lying. She closed her eyes briefly and rubbed her temples. Thankfully, he didn't press the topic further.

"Are you in a lot of pain?"

"I will be okay…"

Claire stood and then swayed slightly in her spot. Sirius lunged forward and steadied her with his hand. He pulled her to his side and placed his arm around her waist before starting to walk and guiding her in the direction James had run. Claire leaned into him, feeling dazed as she took hesitant steps.

"Thank you," Claire murmured.

"Don't mention it," Sirius pulled her closer and gave her a small smile. Even though she felt guilty thinking it, Claire was happy that Mary wasn't here to witness this. She had a feeling no amount of excuses would lift her suspicions after seeing Sirius' arm wrapped around Claire's waist and the other clutching her hand.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Remus trailed slightly behind James, Sirius, and Peter as they made their way across the grounds and toward the Quidditch pitch. Typically he could keep up with their pace, but with the upcoming full moon, he was feeling particularly drained. Claire generally would have kept pace with him so he didn't feel the need to rush to keep up with the group, but today she was off spending time with Lily and Mary. James had asked if the girls wanted to join them in watching his Quidditch practice and unsurprisingly, to everyone except James, they said no. Not being one to let go of things easily, this was still James' topic of conversation as the warm breeze rustled the trees around them.

"I don't understand why they said no so quickly," James tossed the Quaffle he was holding up into the air and caught it with ease.

"I do," Sirius muttered, his lack of patience with the topic showing in his tone.

"Watching Quidditch is a perfectly good way to spend an afternoon," Peter added in a reassuring way to let James know he sided with him.

"It's a Quidditch _practice_ ," Sirius added.

"For their house team," James scoffed, "We're currently in first place with help from what the Michael Finley has announced as my 'superior skill with the Quaffle'."

Modesty was not James' strong suit. Remus didn't blame the girls for not wanting to spend the afternoon sitting in the stands watching blurs of red and gold players sweep across the pitch as they practiced drills. Attending a game would be a fun way to spend an afternoon; watching practice was an entirely different experience. It wasn't one that he would suggest to anyone. The only reason he was there was because he had been out-voted.

"Look, mate," Sirius grabbed the Quaffle out of James' hands before he could toss it into the air again, "I enjoy a good Quidditch match, trust me, but the only reason I voted to join you is because there is no other option. I certainly wasn't going to sit around in the Common Room and potentially let Claire guilt us into working on our History of Magic essay."

"If there is no other option," James ruffled the back of his hair and then motioned for Sirius to throw him the Quaffle, "Then why did the girls refuse to join?"

"Why did Lily refuse is more like it…" Remus had finally managed to catch up to them with what felt like a significant effort.

"You think she's the reason they didn't join us?" James questioned, he sounded a little insulted.

"It's no secret Evans doesn't like you," Sirius chuckled and finally tossed the Quaffle over to him, "Claire has tolerated you for years now and I'm pretty sure Mary has no opinion of you. That leaves Evans as the reason they're off doing something else instead of here to join us in this ridiculous conversation."

"She clearly has questionable taste then," James shrugged it off, unsuccessfully attempting to hide that it bothered him, "Spending all of her time with Snape, clearly she prefers inferior men." Peter nodded in agreement.

"He's been her friend since first year," Remus tried to reason with him, "You two go about hexing him all of the time. Don't you think that may be part of the reason she doesn't like to spend time with you?"

"Well," James set his eyes ahead at the pitch that was approaching, "You have to admit, they're bound to have a much more boring day than we are. If that's the choice they made, they'll have to live with their regrets."

"Sure…" Remus felt sometimes as though talking to James was much like talking to one of the stone walls in the corridor. None of what he said seemed to sink in. Remus huffed as he tried to keep pace with them and let out a small wince.

"How're you holding up there, Remus?" Sirius asked and Remus shook his head in response, "Just think, you've got the full moon and then a few weeks of normalcy until the next one. It will be downhill from tomorrow."

Remus knew that Sirius was trying to be reassuring, but he was definitely going about it in the wrong way. Reminding him that this was just one of the many full moons that he would live through was not at all what he wanted to hear. He was feeling particularly nervous about this upcoming full moon because of the suspicions that he had about none other than Severus Snape.

During the last few weeks, it seemed as though Snape had been keeping a closer eye on himself and his friends than he usually did. A few times Remus had needed to step on Peter's foot to stop him from slipping up and practically announcing proudly that Remus was a werewolf. James had brushed it off, convinced that Severus would never be able to put the pieces together. Sirius, on the other hand, seemed to be keenly aware of Snape's sudden interest in their conversations.

The group arrived at the pitch and James broke off from them to head to change into his Quidditch robes. Remus made his way up the stairs into the stands with Sirius and Peter and finally collapsed onto a bench. He would normally say that he would sleep well being this tired, but with the full moon, he knew he wouldn't get any sleep at all. The next time he would get a reprieve would be when he took Madam Pomfrey's sleeping draught.

Practice went on uneventfully, James made his best effort to show off as much as he possibly could without the captain Liam Aldridge yelling at him for not passing enough to his teammates. Sirius and Remus passed the time by chatting contentedly and playing with the wizard's chess set that Sirius had dragged along with him. Peter mostly commented on the practice and kept himself occupied by pointing out when James did something impressive. Soon enough, Remus found himself wandering down the same stairs that he had found so exhausting to traverse not too long ago. Once reaching the pitch he waited with Sirius and Peter for James to meet them.

As if to confirm his suspicions from before practice, Remus noticed a dark shadow out of the corner of his eye. He turned his head and saw Severus Snape lingering not too far from the group under a tree. Ignoring him, Remus prayed that Sirius wouldn't notice his presence and they could get back to Gryffindor tower without any delays. The sun would be setting soon, and he needed to collect his things and meet Madam Pomfrey before making his way through the Whomping Willow and into the Shrieking Shack.

Sirius' eyes darted in the general direction of where Snape was standing, but if he noticed he was standing there he didn't let on that he did. Sirius instead smiled over at Peter who was making predictions about the next Gryffindor Quidditch match.

"What time do you need to meet Madam Pomfrey?" Sirius asked, not quietly but not loudly either.

"Around 6," Remus said, lowering his voice and hoping that Sirius would respond accordingly.

"Same plan as usual?" Peter asked, his tiny watery eyes looking up at him.

"Yes,"

"Do you remember what the plan is Peter?" Sirius asked in a joking tone, more loudly than Remus would care for him to speak. Peter looked a bit confused.

"Of course I do,"

"You sure?" Sirius smirked at him, "Last time we couldn't pry you from your bed and then you never met us because you forgot how to get into the Whomping Willow."

"That was only once-"

"Just remember," Sirius' voice appeared to be getting louder. Remus shushed him but noticed that his eyes were mischievously shining. Remus' stomach dropped, he was clearly up to something, "You have to press the knot near the base. If you don't, you'll be running around avoiding the branches."

"I remember," Peter said embarrassed.

Remus chanced a glance over at Severus and noticed he was sneaking away from the group and back up to the castle. He wasn't sure if he had heard about the Whomping Willow, but if he had heard how to get past the tree… Remus shuddered at the thought. Whatever plan Sirius had up his sleeve was dangerous. There was no time to find an alternate location or notify a professor, the only person who knew besides Madam Pomfrey was Dumbledore and Remus was certain he had better things to do with his time. Remus would just have to hope that Snape hadn't been able to hear them. It was either that or wake tomorrow knowing that the monster inside of him had finally lived up to its name.

* * *

"What in the hell were you thinking?" James threw his invisibility cloak off of himself onto the floor of their dormitory. Sirius had never heard James genuinely angry with him before. His voice was rougher and louder than it usually was.

Peter sat up on his bed, his eyes still sleepy from being suddenly awoken by James' voice. James was staring daggers at Sirius. He knew why James was angry, but he also knew that he had done the right thing. Severus Snape was more than just a thorn in their side, he had threatened Claire during Christmas break. Ever since then, Sirius had been watching his every move to see if he followed through with his threats.

The one day that Sirius left Claire alone she ended up in the Hospital Wing after having been cornered by a group of Slytherins. They hadn't used that Unforgivable Curse on her, but what would have happened to her if James and Sirius hadn't intervened? Snape was there; he hadn't touched her, but he had made it clear to Sirius didn't have to. _There were plenty of others who would be happy to send a message to someone like her that she's not welcome at Hogwarts._

This wasn't an isolated incident and he wasn't about to give Snape another opportunity to target Claire. No one threatened his friends. Hell, his friends were better to him than his family had ever been. Claire and her endless amount of kindness and ceaseless ability to forgive, she had been kinder and more generous with him and James when they were behaving like a bunch of buffoons than they deserved at times. Yes, they fought, but he would never allow anyone to make her feel threatened or unsafe.

Snape didn't just threaten her, he was going out of her way to make her feel inferior to him just because her parents happen to be Muggles. Claire chose Hogwarts over her family. This school, it's long hallways and high ceilings, made her feel as though she belonged. It was incredibly important to him that she felt welcome here, especially since she didn't at home.

So, he had done something rash. Normally he would discuss his plans with James before taking any action but this was too important to risk being talked out of. The only way Severus Snape would leave Claire alone would be if Sirius sent him a message. He had been thinking of different options since the break, but he had no definitive plans until the opportunity presented itself. Snape had been skulking around them for the last couple of weeks, clearly suspicious of their plans and hoping to hear something important to get them into trouble.

All Sirius needed to do was wait until the right moment to let it slip how to get past the Whomping Willow. One look at a werewolf and Snape would never consider getting near any of them again.

"What happened?" Peter asked, clearly confused about the ruckus that James was causing as he slammed drawers shut; he rifled around and finally pulled out his pajamas.

"Yes, what happened Sirius?" James said in a sarcastic tone. Sirius shrugged.

"He deserved it,"

"Who deserved what?" Peter rubbed his eyes and glanced over at Sirius.

"That's your excuse?" James hurled a pillow over at Sirius who stepped out of the way, it flopped on the floor. "He deserved it? I honestly cannot believe you."

"What? No one got hurt, right?" Sirius could feel irritation begin to seep under his skin. If James had been here during Christmas, he wouldn't be yelling at him in this moment he would have helped him plan this.

"Only because I tackled him out of the way," James chucked another pillow at Sirius but missed and knocked over a few items sitting on top of Sirius' trunk. "You could have killed him, do you know that?"

"Oh, he's fine!" Sirius shouted at James, his temper no longer something he could control, "One close call never hurt anyone."

"What is going on?" Peter pleaded with them.

"Sirius intentionally let slip how to get past the Whomping Willow today," James spat as he ran his fingers through his hair in a huff of anger, "He made sure that Severus heard it when he was spying on you at the Quidditch Pitch this afternoon. Thankfully Remus told me about it and I put a stop to anything before- but Severus saw Remus!"

"He knows?" Peter sounded worried.

"Did you ever think for a moment that this might be a bad idea?" James sunk down onto his bed and glared over at Sirius, "What was your plan? Kill him so he no longer annoys you in the corridors?"

"I didn't think it all the way through-"

"Clearly!"

"- I just needed to send him a message and I did!" Sirius shouted.

"Well, the message he got is that Remus is a werewolf!" James stood and walked over to Sirius to look him directly in the eye, "You didn't even think for a moment about the fact that if Snape blabs the entire school could know by the end of this week? Do you want Remus to be kicked out?"

"No!"

"And what if Remus killed him?" James shoved Sirius hard in the chest, his body bumping into his chest of drawers, "Our best friend would have to live the rest of his life knowing he killed someone. Did you care to think of Remus before deploying this ridiculous plan of yours?"

"Snape deserved it!" Sirius shoved him back and James stumbled.

"Remus doesn't!" James shook his head in disbelief, "I knew that you were a bit reckless but this is taking it to a whole new level, Sirius."

"Aren't you going to ask me why he deserved it?" Sirius spat at him, feeling some of his anger fade and resentment building instead. James was being completely unreasonable, blaming him for things that didn't even happen. Snape didn't die, Remus didn't kill him. Yes, Snape now knew that Remus was a werewolf but he doubted he would have the courage to say anything to anyone and he hard a hard time believing that anyone would take him seriously if he did.

"I don't care if he hexed you when your back was turned or if he insulted-"

"He threatened Claire!"

James paused for a moment and looked over at Sirius, the fierceness in his demeanor fading slightly. Sirius could feel his pulse pounding away in his body, the anger he had been holding in about Snape and his threats against Claire's well-being finally coming to the surface. It had been months since Christmas, but to Sirius, it felt as though it had happened yesterday.

"Christmas morning," Sirius sank onto his bed and looked over at James, "Snape told me that he would lash out at Claire. He made it clear that she would be a target of those assholes in Slytherin because she's- he called her a Mudblood."

"That doesn't mean he was going to follow through-"

"He was there when they used that curse on Mary," Sirius shouted again, "I know for a fact that he's friends with Mulciber and Avery. He watched as Claire was shoved into that wall and ended up with a concussion. What would have happened if we hadn't shown up James?"

"You let him get into your head," James said calmly, clearly not interested in yelling at him any longer. "What you did today was not worth the risk. If you had told me, we could have done something else to send him a message."

"I stand by what I did!" Sirius shot a look over at James, "I'd do it again if I had to."

"Look, I know you want to protect her," James calmly approached Sirius, "Hell, I do too. She's grown on all of us-"

"He was never going to let this go!"

"- You can't go rogue on me!" James raised his voice to speak over Sirius, "Severus isn't worth getting yourself expelled, put in Azkaban for murder, or for risking Remus-"

"Claire is!"

James paused and looked at Sirius closely, he sighed, "She would never forgive you for doing this," Sirius knew that he was right, his shoulders slumped over, "If she knew you let Remus hurt or, Merlin-forbid, kill Severus because you thought you were being noble by protecting her… she'd never speak to you again."

Sirius gulped, he knew Claire would rather be bullied herself than let her friends risk anything for her. It was stupid; brave, but stupid. She didn't understand the reality of these curses. The danger was much more severe than she believed it was.

Peter was staring at both of them in silence, his beady eyes darting back and forth between them. Sirius nodded, not ready to verbalize that James was correct in his assessment. If Claire knew about this evening's events, she would cut Sirius off completely. Only their quiet breathing could be heard for a few moments.

"Don't make me have to save your ass again," James muttered making his way over to his bed, exhausted, "You're my best friend, but I'm not saving Snape more than once because you're impulsive. Now, let's get some sleep because we have to be up in a few hours to help Remus."

"Claire?" Sirius couldn't manage to get the entire question out of his mouth. The reality of the situation finally sinking in for him. If James decided to tell Claire what happened, he might risk losing her friendship permanently. That thought hit him like a ton of bricks in the gut, knocking the wind out of his lungs.

"It's best if she doesn't know," James sighed as he slipped his pajamas on. Sirius felt relief wash over him.

"Thanks, mate…"

"Don't make me regret it," James got into bed and rolled so his back was facing Sirius. Peter sat back in bed and closed his eyes, acting as if he was going to immediately fall back asleep. Sirius lay there, staring blankly above his bed. He continued to stare until the first rays of sunshine cast shadows upon the ceiling of their room. He did feel guilty about what happened, but deep down he knew he knew would make the same decision again if he had to.

* * *

 **A/N: Hello everyone! I have been hard at work this week writing all about the Maurauder's fourth year. Basically, I have plenty more chapters coming your way. The plan as of right now is to post on Friday evenings. That gives me plenty of time to write and edit before sharing it with you. As always, thanks for sticking with me so far. All of your reviews have been so kind and they really warm my heart. The next few chapters are super eventful and I can't wait to share them with you.**


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

Steam filled the platform as the Claire dashed toward the entrance for the train she knew so well. Her mother had hit traffic on the way into the city this morning and she had thought for a moment that she was going to miss her opportunity to head back to the location she felt most at ease. Hogwarts had quickly become more of a home to her than the small house she had been raised in, so much so that she no longer slept well in her childhood bedroom. The idea of missing her ride to go back for her fourth year was completely devastating, so it was with great relief that she rushed through the entrance to Platform 9 ¾ and saw the scarlet engine waiting for her.

With the small amount of upper body strength that she did have, she drug her large trunk toward the door to the train with one hand and held her owl's cage with the other. She was sure that anyone who was looking out of their window could see that she was struggling, but in that moment she didn't care. Just one more good tug and she would finally be on her way back to school. Claire heard someone clear their throat on the train, she turned her head to get a good look at them.

Standing in the doorway was a young boy with sandy blond hair and chocolate brown eyes. Some freckles danced upon his cheeks and he wore rectangular glasses and slid slightly down his nose. He had broad shoulders and long limbs that made his body look as though it were in transition. It took a moment for Claire to place him; it was Bertram Aubrey the fourth year Hufflepuff who she saw consistently in her Herbology class.

"You look like you could use some help," He reached his hand forward to help her into the train, she graciously accepted it and stepped up with ease. Bertram bent down and with a quick tug pulled the trunk into the train for her.

"Thank you," Claire gave him a small smile.

"If you tell me what compartment you're going to be in," Bertram added his deep voice easily heard over the thrum of chatter in the background, "I can bring your trunk for you."

"You don't need to," Claire insisted, he had already been far more helpful than he needed to. She'd hate to take advantage of his kindness for much longer.

"I don't mind," He began to pull her trunk down the hallway, "Which direction?"

"Uh…" Claire looked around for a moment. Her friends could be anywhere on this train, they weren't really known for their consistency. Every year they sat in a different compartment, letting the person who arrived first pick their location.

"Ludgrove!" Claire's head spun as she turned in the direction of the voice she knew so well. James had poked his head out of a compartment down the hall. The corners of her mouth turned up as she saw him, his hair was even messier than it usually was and his blue eyes shone with the promise of a new year filled with pranks. She had missed him, she had missed all of them. "We thought we were going to have to send a search party for you. What took you so long?"

"Traffic!" She yelled back.

"You Muggles and your traffic," James chuckled, something gold shimmered at his shoulder he reached up and caught the Snitch with one hand, "It's amazing you get to anything on time. Come on then… we saved you a spot."

"I can take it from here," Claire turned at looked at Bertram who was still holding onto one end of her trunk. He seemed a little less enthused about helping her than he did originally, "If you have somewhere to be…"

"No," He shook his head, his smile now returning to his face, "I offered to help, I wouldn't forgive myself for not following through."

He motioned for her to go first and Claire began to walk toward the compartment. She wanted to rush, but she felt very aware of the fact that Bertram had offered to help her and it wouldn't be polite to just sprint away and join her friends. She glanced briefly over her shoulder to give him a grateful smile.

"How was your summer, Bertram?" She didn't really know much about his family or what he did during the summer, but it seemed like the best topic of conversation for the short distance they needed to walk together.

"It was great!" His voice was incredibly enthusiastic as he talked, "My father was able to take some time off from the Ministry and we were able to travel to Romania. We did the typical tourist activities for my mother, but we were still able to spend some time at a dragon colony there to learn all about them. Mum was terrified, she works for a law firm and she had never seen anything like a dragon before. I reckon she was incredibly relieved when we got home."

"That sounds amazing," Claire was slightly jealous, she would have loved to see some dragons in person. They would terrify her, most likely, but it would be a fear worth facing.

"I hope to go back again sometime," Bertram walked closer to Claire, her trunk still dragging on the carpeted floor of the hallway. The train began to move and Claire paused for a moment to make sure she had her bearings before continuing down the hallway, "How was your summer? Go anywhere?"

"My summer was…" Claire tried to find the correct words to describe it. The best part about her summer was that she hadn't argued with her father at all. She spent most of her afternoons and evenings doing volunteer work for the congregation at her father's request. Folding pamphlets and helping organize coffee hour wasn't exactly a trip to Romania to visit the dragons, "Relaxing. I mostly stayed at home."

"Glad to hear it!" Bertram glanced at her awkwardly as they arrived outside of the compartment that her friends were in, "Well, I suppose I will see you in Herbology."

"Yes, definitely." Claire gave him a kind smile, "Thank you, again."

"No problem!" He fiddled with the end of her trunk, visibly nervous, "Claire, I was wondering if maybe-"

"It's about damn time," Sirius threw the door open to the compartment and smirked at Claire, "You're really taking the idea of being fashionably late seriously, aren't you?"

"Hello to you too," Claire shook her head at him.

"I'm assuming you'll need help-" Sirius stopped speaking as he noticed Bertram Aubrey standing there with Claire's trunk in his hands, "I'm sorry… you are?"

"Oh don't be rude," Claire shoved him in the shoulder, "Bertram helped me get my trunk onto the train because, clearly, my friends are too lazy to come to my aid."

"Come to your aid?" James' voice came from inside of the compartment, "A couple months at home with your parents and suddenly you have lost all of your independence."

"Well…" Sirius reached forward for Claire's trunk, "It would be bad manners to continue to let the damsel be in distress. Thanks for doing most of the work… Bertram, is it?"

"Yes," Bertram looked sheepishly over at Claire for a moment.

"Your services are no longer needed, Bertram," Claire could hear James chuckling from inside of the compartment as Sirius spoke, "Her friends will take it from here."

"I can-" Before Bertram could object, Sirius scooped up Claire's trunk and moved it into the compartment and above them for storage. Now that the doorway was free, Claire could get a good look into the compartment. James was lounging comfortably, his feet resting on the seat across from him. Next to him was Peter who was going through a pile of candy and pulling out the licorice wands. Sirius took his seat next to James' feet and, finally, closest to the door was Remus who was reading a book.

Claire couldn't control the smile on her face. It probably wouldn't be long before James and Sirius were making her crazy, but for now, she was so content to be reunited with her friends. James released the Snitch he had been playing with and watched as it flitted about above him. Sirius cleared his throat and gave Claire a confused look. She turned and realized that Bertram was still standing behind her.

"Thanks so much for helping me," She wasn't sure why he was still lingering in the doorway instead of heading off in the direction of his friends.

"You're welcome," He looked nervously at her, "I was wondering if maybe… Could we talk alone for a moment?"

"She doesn't really do alone," James smirked, clearly reveling in how uncomfortable he was, "We need to be present at all times in case something embarrassing happens to her. That way we can lord it over her for all of eternity."

"Nevermind-"

"Oh just come out with it Aubrey," Sirius barked, "We don't have all day. If you're going to ask her to Hogsmeade, just do it so we can get back to more important things."

Claire noticed Bertram blush, she shot an angry look over at Sirius and James, placed her owl into the compartment, and shut the door. She didn't know how she was going to respond to his request, but she did know that she wouldn't let James and Sirius torment him.

"I…" Bertram shifted uncomfortably and looked down the hallway, trying to figure out a way to escape, "I need to go. I will see you in Herbology, right?"

"Right," Claire felt incredibly guilty, "Bertram, I'm sorry about them. They're harmless… just a little intimidating."

"It's okay," He shrugged it off, "It was good to see you again, Claire."

"You too," She watched as he walked off down the hall and disappeared into a compartment. Claire took a moment to gather her thoughts before hastily sliding the compartment door open and glaring in at the friends she had been so eager to see a few short minutes ago.

"Well," James said with a smirk on his face, "Aren't you just a ray of sunshine."

"Oh shut up," Claire walked into the compartment and sat down next to Remus who handed her a chocolate frog as a peace offering. She wasn't sure why he was the one to do so, he hadn't actively participated in humiliating someone perfectly nice. Claire accepted it anyway with a small smile in his direction.

"Getting asked on dates really puts you in a foul mood doesn't it?" Sirius motioned for Peter to throw him some candy. Peter tossed a licorice wand, but his aim was poor and Sirius nearly missed it.

"Did he ask you then?" Peter questioned, seeming genuinely interested in the answer.

"No," Claire sounded exasperated, "I barely know him, he just helped me with my trunk."

"Oh, don't be naive," James reached up and grabbed the Snitch again easily before placing it in his pocket, "He was hoping to butter you up by helping you and then just casually slip in that he doesn't have a date for the first Hogsmeade weekend."

"If he was," Claire shot at him, "He didn't ask because two idiots humiliated him."

"Did you want him to?" Sirius stopped munching on the licorice wand and looked over at her in disgust.

"No!" Claire could feel herself blushing.

"That's the only reason I can think of that you would have closed the door," James stretched his feet out more to get into a better position.

"He deserved some privacy," Claire could feel frustration building under the surface of her skin, "It was the least I could do."

"If you're that desperate for a Hogsmeade date," Sirius laughed heartily, "I'd take you. That way you won't damage the reputation of all of us by associating yourself with someone who has the backbone of a flobberworm."

"Go with you?" Claire could hear the shock and disgust in her voice, "I'd rather take the Whomping Willow as a date. Bertram is perfectly kind-"

"He is quite possibly the most boring bloke in our year," James added in support of Sirius.

"You'd think after years of spending time with us," Sirius looked over at Claire, a much more serious look on his face than she expected, "You would have better taste than Bertram Aubrey."

"Oh leave her be," Remus interrupted Sirius before he could open his mouth again, "It's nice to be asked."

"He didn't even ask," Sirius grumbled, turning away from Claire and looking out the window instead.

Claire looked over at Remus, his green eyes buried in a rather old and dusty book. He looked up and gave her a small smile, her heart skipped a beat. Although she was happy to see Sirius, James, and Peter she had been the most excited to see Remus again. She had written him every day during the summer, and each time she got a response from him it seemed as though her stomach did somersaults. Claire had thought it was just excitement about not being completely isolated from the wizarding world, but now looking at him in the compartment she realized it was more than that.

"Thank you," Claire breathed a sigh of relief, hoping that the topic would be dropped and they could move on. "Have you seen Lily anywhere?" Claire asked Remus, knowing if anyone would be aware her whereabouts it would most likely be him.

"Probably off with Snape somewhere, I'm sure," James muttered looking out of the window.

"Third compartment down on your right," Remus gave her a reassuring smile, "James is right though, Snape is with her."

"Oh," The disappointment in Claire's voice was clear, "I had told her I would say hello… but, if she's with Severus- I will see her at the feast and say hello then."

Claire leaned back in her seat and listened as James began to tell everyone about how extraordinary his summer had been. Sirius closed his eyes and rested his hands behind his head while Peter sat at full attention soaking in every one of James' words. Claire looked at Remus briefly and then rested her head on his shoulder, content to be close to him again. Remus felt tense for a moment and then relaxed, shifting himself to sit as close to her as possible.

* * *

Remus' wand went flying across the empty classroom and landed on the floor a few feet away from him. It was a dreary autumn day, large raindrops were falling outside and creating a racket on the old windows. He looked up with a bright grin on his face. Since arriving back at school, he and Claire had been spending some time on the weekends practicing dueling on their own. They still were part of the dueling club, but they took any chance they got to sneak away from the library and do some additional practice.

A few weeks into signing up for the dueling club, Sirius and James became bored of it and stopped showing up to meetings. Soon after that, Peter followed suit. They had urged Remus to also quit, that he could be spending his time doing better things, but to be quite honest Remus enjoyed it. He liked the defensive spells and the real world application of the things they learned in Defense Against the Dark Arts.

Claire had greatly improved her skill since they had begun the extra practice. She was more consistent with her protective spells and had gotten more accurate in the offensive spells she was using. Remus strolled over and picked up his wand, Claire was clearly excited about her progress.

"You stopped flourishing your wand so much," Remus pointed out to her, "It's made a big difference in your accuracy."

"What's made a big difference is your help," Remus shrugged, not accepting the compliment, "Seriously, you are really good at this."

"At dueling?" Remus laughed, "I don't think-"

"No," Claire shook her head, her wavy hair moving around her as she did so, "You're good at teaching me."

"Well…" Remus stood awkwardly for a moment, "It's easy, you're a quick learner."

"Don't be so modest," Claire walked over to him and touched his arm, "I wouldn't be such a quick learner if you weren't so helpful."

Remus locked eyes with her for a moment, her soft hand still resting on his forearm. He was torn. He wanted nothing more than for her to continue to stand this close to him, but he also knew he should pull away. Claire had never been one to shy away from physical contact with him, but something about the energy between them had changed since they came back for their fourth year. Remus had always been grateful for her reaching out to him, but now when her fingertips made contact with his skin he felt as though electricity was pulsing through his body.

Never before had he felt an intense need to be so close to someone like he did with Claire. When he was close to her, he found himself preoccupied worrying about the moment that she would pull away. The moments that he wasn't close to her were no better because all he was able to think of was how to get her hand to brush up against his. He'd started handing her things that were within her grasp, just out of the hope that her fingers would touch his.

"What do you want to practice now?" Remus gave himself a little bit of space from her so that he could refocus his attention on the goal of their afternoon: to practice defensive spells.

"Well…" Claire eyed him hesitantly.

"What is it?" Remus smirked, he knew that she had some kind of idea but for some reason, she was holding back on him.

"I was reading in ahead in our textbook-"

"Of course you were," Remus chuckled, she smacked him playfully on the arm.

"About the Patronus Charm," Remus looked at her with admiration, she was clearly getting more confident in her skills if she was requesting to practice the Patronus Charm.

Although they had not covered the topic in class and wouldn't until they were much older, Remus had spent a decent amount of time practicing it last year. The few weeks that Claire and Remus were avoiding each other meant that he had spent a lot of time in empty classrooms reading ahead for his favorite course. Naturally, he was fascinated by the spell; the fact that it was fueled by happiness and good memories made it incredibly appealing.

Even after reuniting with Claire, he had spent a lot of time practicing it. The spell was difficult, more difficult than he had even imagined it to be. Finally, after months of tireless practice in empty classrooms like this one, Remus was able to produce it. The moment was filled with so much joy and then was immediately crushed when he realized what he patronus' form was: a wolf. Something that was fueled by the happy memories in him still somehow managed to be a reminder of the part of himself he disliked the most.

"It's a really advanced spell," Remus admitted, hoping that if he feigned ignorance she would not ask him to attempt it.

"I know…" Claire looked optimistically over at him, "But, I was just was hoping we could practice it."

"It feeds on happy memories," Remus fiddled with the wand in his hand, "It would probably be best to close your eyes and think of a memory that makes you happy."

Claire took his advice and closed her eyes. Remus felt his breath catch in his throat, he was overcome with the desire to reach out and touch her hand. Instead, he stepped further away from her and looked as a small smile appeared on her face.

"I think I have one," Her eyes fluttered open and she looked at him.

"Focus on that memory," He gazed at her, "Let it fill your mind completely, and then say the incantation."

"Okay," Claire's face became serious and she closed her eyes again. She stood like that for a few moments before yelling, "Expecto Patronum!"

Wisps of white air flew lazily out of the end of the wand and quickly faded away. Claire sighed and glanced over at Remus, disappointed. He looked at her with sympathy, he had been in that same position last year. It had taken him a week to even get the white wisps to appear.

"It's a difficult spell," Remus reassured her, "It won't happen on the first attempt."

"It's not the first attempt," Claire said exasperated, "I've been trying in my spare time for the last few weeks. I haven't been able to make any progress."

"Are you thinking of the same memory each time?"

"Yes," Claire sat down on a table in the classroom and looked over at him, "I think about the day I got my Hogwarts acceptance letter, the day I found out I'm a witch."

"Maybe you need something stronger than that," Remus sat next to her, she leaned into him and he felt himself slide closer to her.

"Like what?" She asked curiously.

"I'm not sure," Remus admitted, "I can't really help you much with this. I wish that I could."

"This helps," Claire rested her head against his arm, her long hair falling behind her back.

"With the spell?"

"No," Claire sighed, "Just in general. Sitting next to you, like this, makes me feel… content."

Remus was sure with her so close to him she would be able to hear his heart pounding away in his chest. They sat like that for a moment, enjoying the quiet that had settled into the otherwise empty room. Remus considered moving his arm and placing it around her waist, but he decided against it. Any sudden movements seemed as though they were a risk for ruining what seemed to be a perfect moment.

"When you attempt to cast a Patronus," Claire murmured quietly, looking up at him, "What do you think of?"

"My friends," Remus looked into her eyes, hoping she would accept his vague response. She didn't need to know that the first time he was successful at casting his Patronus he was thinking of the day he met her.

* * *

 **A/N: Hello, everyone! Thanks to all of your continued support for this story; all of the favorites and follows really mean a lot to me. I greatly enjoyed writing this chapter and I couldn't wait to share it with all of you. The next few chapters are some of the favorite pieces of plot that I have written so far. Look for updates again next Friday. Cheers!**


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Students were huddled together in Greenhouse Four this afternoon. Although the greenhouse was generally warm, snow was falling thickly outside and a brisk wind had created a slight draft. Thankfully, as the class progressed, the body warmth of so many fourth year Gryffindor and Hufflepuffs made a world of difference so most of them could abandon their winter cloaks for their assignment. Sirius stood between James and Remus, watching as Claire answered every question Professor Sprout had about the topic of this afternoon's lesson: bubotubers.

According to Claire, and Professor Sprout, these ugly things seemed to have some kind of magical healing property. Which, in Sirius' opinion, was fortunate because there was no way anyone would choose to have them in their backyard just for aesthetic purposes. They would most likely be an extinct species if it weren't for their apparent usefulness. Sirius scanned the greenhouse and tuned Claire out as she was awarded additional points for Gryffindor.

He noticed Bertram Aubrey standing in the front of the group of Hufflepuffs, he pushed his rectangular glasses up his nose and smiled in Claire's direction. _Ugh_ , Sirius was going to be sick. It was bad enough that Claire was being such an incessant show-off today, but watching Aubrey enjoy her showing off was too much to handle. Sirius could understand his interest, Claire was by no means ugly. However, mooning over her was beyond irritating to witness.

"This afternoon," Professor Sprout carried a large pot forward that was holding an ugly black object that had more in common with a slug than it did with other plants, "You will be collecting the pus from the protrusions on the bubotubers. Make sure to wear your gloves! The medicinal properties are only when it's diluted, you don't want the pus to touch your skin unless you're interested in spending the rest of the week in the Hospital Wing."

Sirius watched as Bertram casually began to shift his way slowly across in the greenhouse in Claire's direction. Claire was completely oblivious to his movement, Sirius stepped a bit forward to block Claire from his view. Sirius wasn't a fool, he knew that he and James were intimidating to be around. They had quite the reputation around the school; he hoped his presence would be enough to scare Bertram away.

"Work in groups of three today," Professor Sprout lifted her finger to count the students and make sure that would split them into even groups, "Collect the pus into these vials, and please do let me know if you need assistance. This is not something to attempt unless you're completely clear on what you're doing."

Sirius looked to his right and noticed his new positioning hadn't deterred Aubrey like he had hoped it would. As the students began to talk amongst themselves and divide up into groups, Claire turned around to address her friends.

"There are five us," Claire pulled her hair over her shoulder as she spoke, "That means two of us are going to have to find someone else to work with."

"I can work with-" Remus volunteered, but before he could finish his sentence Sirius cut him off.

"How about Remus, James, and Peter," James looked a bit shocked as Sirius spoke, "Claire and I-"

"Do you need an extra?" Sirius turned around as he heard Bertram's voice beside Claire. She gave him a small smile and nodded.

"I could work with Claire and Bertram," Peter offered, Sirius shook his head.

"No, we already decided," Sirius spoke before James or Remus could pipe in, "I'll work with Claire and Aubrey."

"We didn't decide anything," Claire gave Sirius and confused look, he let out a barking laugh.

"Did I say 'we'?" Sirius asked while chuckling, "I mean _I_ decided."

"I don't know if that's a good idea," Remus looked hesitantly over at Sirius, "I think it would probably be better-"

"I'm glad we're all in agreement about this," Sirius grabbed some gloves from the table and slid them onto his hands, "Let's get to work. Aubrey, you want to go grab one of those ugly things and bring it over here. Unless you think it'd be too heavy for you…"

"No," Bertram's face turned slightly red and his voice took on an irritated tone, "I can get it." He stomped away. Claire shot Sirius a look and pulled the gloves onto her hands.

"What are you up to?" James whispered at Sirius as Peter wandered away to get their bubotuber.

"Nothing," Sirius shrugged, "Aubrey is just getting a little too close for comfort."

"Do you need my help?" James grinned over at him, Sirius shook his head. He appreciated the offer but Bertram was a problem he could deal with in his sleep. No need for James to get involved this time.

"Sirius, this is a bad idea," Remus lowered his voice but he spoke in a warning tone, "If you're going to antagonize him all class you are just going to end up getting a rise out of Claire."

"Oh she's always mad at me anyway," Sirius shrugged, "I might as well give her a reason for it today."

"Sirius-" Remus was pulled away by James who gave Sirius a thumbs-up signal.

"One bubotuber," Bertram huffed slightly as he lifted the large pot onto the table in front of Claire, "Why don't you go get the vials, Sirius?"

Sirius narrowed his eyes at him. He had no intention of leaving the table. Sirius stood there with his gloves on, staring Bertram down. Aubrey would probably give in to the pressure if he waited it out. Claire examined the plant for a moment and then looked up at Sirius.

"Are you going to go get them?" She asked, irritated by him already.

"No," Sirius said bluntly, "I'm quite comfortable where I'm standing right now. No need to move."

"What a great group member," Bertram said sarcastically, sliding the gloves onto his hands, "I can see why you excel academically Sirius."

Maybe this wouldn't be as simple as Sirius has thought. He glared over at Aubrey, still unmoving.

"Merlin's beard," Claire sighed, "I will go get the vials if you two are going to be so stubborn." She walked away muttering under her breath.

Sirius watched her waltz away and positioned himself so he could get a good look at Aubrey around the plant. There was nothing remarkable about him, he was just your average Hufflepuff. The fact that he seemed to think that he had a chance with Claire was laughable. Claire was extraordinary in every sense of the word, Bertram was mediocre at best. Sirius noticed Bertram adjust his glasses and look longingly in Claire's direction.

"I know what you're getting at," Sirius growled at him, "It's not happening."

"Excuse me?" Bertram said startled.

"Oh please," Sirius scoffed, "You're not even good at hiding the way you moon after her like that. She's not interested. Aren't there any girls in Hufflepuff who would be interested in spending time with you or have they all turned you down already?"

Bertram grew red in the face again, "No one has turned me down-" He leaned forward and lowered his voice.

"Yet," Sirius smirked, "Claire's about to."

"We'll see what she has to say," Bertram glared, his eyes darting to locate Claire and ensure that she was far enough away to not hear their conversation. "I'm confident she is quite capable of making her own decisions without you looming over her."

Sirius pushed the giant ugly plant out of the way to get a good look at Aubrey, "I'm not about to stand here and let you guilt her into saying yes. If you want to ask her, you're going to have to go through me first and I'm sorry to tell you that it's not going to happen."

"You're jealous!" Bertram snapped at him. Sirius let out a cackle. Jealous? Him? Of what? Claire was quite possibly one of the most annoying girls he had ever met and Sirius had been followed around by many an annoying girl. If Claire dated someone then it would at least keep her occupied so that she stopped reminding him to do his homework when they were in the Common Room.

"Don't make me laugh!" Sirius shook his head and rolled his eyes, "I'm Sirius Black and you are just some average Hufflepuff who can't even get up enough courage to ask a girl to Hogsmeade."

Claire made her way back over to them and placed the vials on the table. She looked pointedly at Sirius for a moment before sliding the vials over to him.

"If you're going to make me go and get the vials," Claire said to him with frustration in her voice, "Then you're definitely not sitting back and doing nothing like you do usually."

"But I'm so charming when I do nothing-"

"What's the plan?" Bertram asked brightly, Claire smiled at him, thankful for his enthusiasm.

"Well," Claire said straightening up a bit and appraising the bubotuber, "If someone wants to hold a vial up for me, I can try to extract some of the pus. It would be difficult to do both at the same time."

"I can do it," Sirius picked up a vial and held it near the protrusion that Claire pointed at, she looked a bit surprised at his offer to help but accepted it anyway.

Claire squeezed hard and the protrusion bulged, but the pus seemed to be unwilling to burst forward. She gave it another squeeze, but still nothing. Claire let out a sigh before giving it a third attempt and giving up.

"Here, may I?" Bertram offered, stepping forward and waiting for her to nod before placing his hands over Claire's. He provided some extra leverage and helped her to squeeze the bubotuber which then shot pus forward into the vial that Sirius was holding. Claire had a mixture of excitement and disgust on her face, Sirius just looked disgusted but not about the pus.

"Do you want to give the next one a try?" Claire asked Bertram who had continued to stand closer to her than Sirius would have preferred.

"Sure," Bertram smiled at her eagerly, "Do you want to grab a vial?"

Claire reached for the next vial as Sirius placed a stopper on the one he had been holding. Before he knew it Claire had unstoppered the glass and was holding it beneath another protrusion. Bertram reached out and placed his hands on hers to reposition the vial and he blushed as he smiled in her direction.

He squeezed and more pus came pouring out of the protrusion and directly into the vial that Claire had been holding. She placed the stopper on it and moved on to the next protrusion. Claire and Bertram worked like this for a while, quietly helping each other and working in unison. Sirius hated every moment of it. Not just because Aubrey kept placing his hands around Claire's or because he would blush any time she looked in his direction, but because he was proving Sirius wrong. Claire wasn't turning him down. He hadn't asked her out, but she was oddly receptive to his attention.

Sirius managed to squeeze some pus out of the protrusion closest to him and sloppily put it into a vial which he stoppered. Claire and Bertram had begun to chatter happily as they worked. Sirius looked over his shoulder at James who raised his eyes at him silently asking for a status update. He shook his head and rolled his eyes, James looked disappointed.

"Are you going to the Quidditch match this weekend?" Sirius turned around and heard Claire ask this question curiously. Gryffindor would be playing Hufflepuff in what was bound to be a complete shut out of the Badgers. Their team didn't withstand a chance against James and the rest of the Gryffindor chasers.

"I'm not sure," Bertram said quietly, "I might if I had someone to go with-"

"Need a companion to watch Hufflepuff get trounced?" The words flew out of Sirius' mouth before he barely had the chance to think them.

"I…" Bertram seemed caught off guard by Sirius' sudden intrusion after being silent for awhile, "I just prefer some company."

"And your entire house attending the game isn't company?" Sirius could feel Claire nudging him with her foot to get his attention. He refused to look at her.

"What I mean is-"

"Claire is busy," Sirius said loudly, "She's not going to the Quidditch match with you because she's going to be in the stands with her friends and fellow Gryffindors. Cheering against your house team."

"Sirius!" Claire kicked his foot under the table and glared at him.

"What?" Sirius shot a look at her, "You already have plans, do you not?"

"I'm sorry," Claire ignored Sirius and looked at Bertram with sympathy, "I seem to be friends with someone who has no manners whatsoever."

"It's alright," Bertram looked slightly embarrassed, "I think we're ready to clean up anyway."

He removed his gloves and began to collect the vials that they had filled with pus. Sirius had a quick thought and before Claire or Bertram noticed he loosened the stopper from the vial closest to him. He placed it back on the table and watched as Bertram grabbed it.

Everything that happened in that moment seemed to occur in slow motion. Bertram pulled the vial from the table, the stopper came off and before he realized it the bubotuber pus spilled out onto his hand. He suddenly dropped it, let out a yelp, and the vial shattered onto the floor with pus splattering everywhere. Sirius reached forward and pulled Claire out of the way of the pus and watched as large boils sprouted up on Bertram's hand.

Professor Sprout stopped providing feedback to a group of Hufflepuff students and sprung into action. She whipped her wand and cleaned up the pus and glass from the floor as she ran over to Bertram Aubrey who was holding his hand and howling in pain.

"Did anyone else get pus on them?" Professor Sprout asked in a panicked voice. Everyone else stood around in shock and shook their heads. She examined his hand carefully, tutting solemnly as she did so. "Class is dismissed early. I need to take Mr. Aubrey to see Madam Pomfrey. Please complete your assigned essays to bring to class on Tuesday."

The class quietly picked up their bags and began to throw their books into them, except for Claire. She stood there glaring at Sirius in disgust. He looked up at her, waiting for the flood gates to open and for the argument to begin.

"Did you do that?" Her voice was barely a whisper but menacing all the same, "Did you leave that vial loosened?"

"Yes," Sirius glared at her, not even willing to deny it, "You're welcome."

* * *

Remus watched as Claire stormed her way out of the greenhouse and into the snow outside. He had known that this had been a bad idea; Remus should have spoken up, he should have insisted that he be the one to work with Claire and Bertram. Sirius was too impulsive and hotheaded to be trusted in a group with Claire on his own. Especially not with Bertram Aubrey in the mix.

Remus would bet every galleon that he had, which was not many, that Sirius was behind the accident with the pus. If he was able to put that together, he knew that definitely meant that Claire had figured it out. Hence her angry exit from the greenhouse on her own. What surprised Remus though was that Sirius was not far behind her, walking off in a huff instead of hanging back with a smirk on his face.

Remus glanced at James and without any words spoken they both hurried up collecting their things and made their way out onto the grounds with Peter trailing behind them. The snow had piled up high, but thankfully someone had cleared out a path for all of the students to walk in. A line of black winter cloaks was heading up toward the castle, huddled together to keep warm. However, to Remus' left he could see two students off on their own, he headed off in that direction with James on his tail.

"I can't believe you!" Remus heard Claire yell. After years of friendship, Remus had memorized the pattern to their arguments. It typically started with one person (usually Claire) storming off in silence, followed by screaming, and ending with one party (usually Sirius) saying something hurtful that would mean they didn't speak to each other for a few days until they both cooled off.

"Me?" Sirius yelled back, "I can't believe you!"

"I didn't even do anything!" Claire threw her hands up in the air in exasperation, "I participated in class and did my assignment. Was I supposed to stand there and do nothing like you usually do? Maybe my lack of caring about Herbology would make me cool and suddenly mysterious to the rest of the student body!"

"It's not what you did!" James looked over at Remus and shook his head laughing, clearly not bothered by their argument, "It's what you didn't do!"

"I bet you some chocolate frogs and a butterbeer," James whispered to Remus with a smirk on his face, "That they won't speak to each other for a week this time."

"I'm not going to bet on that," Remus said with a disapproving look.

"I will," Peter chimed in quietly, "I think it will be two weeks."

"You both are despicable," Remus said as they shook on their bet.

"That doesn't even make any sense!" Claire said picking up some snow and tossing it angrily in Sirius' direction. He stepped closer to her with a grim look on his face.

"You just let Aubrey touch you-"

"Oh, Merlin's beard!" Claire exclaimed, running her hands through her hair.

"His hands were all over yours and you just let him do that!"

"He was helping me squeeze pus out of a plant," Claire said emphatically, clearly trying to demonstrate to everyone how crazed Sirius was being at that moment. Remus felt his stomach drop, he had expected Claire to deny that Bertram had touched her at all. James looked between Sirius and Claire with an amused smile on his face.

"I've seen you do plenty of things in that class," Sirius said in a dangerously low tone, "You didn't need help. You are leading him on! You like the attention he gives you so you were putting on an act so he'll keep following you around like a lost puppy."

"I am doing no such thing-"

"Stop wasting his time! You're not going out with him"

"That's not for you to decide!" Claire spat at him.

"Oh, please!" Sirius stepped closer to her, snow collecting in his hair as he spoke, "I'm not going to let you subject us to Bertram Aubrey just because you're feeling starved for attention. We have a certain reputation to uphold and I won't have you ruining it!"

"Sirius-" Remus knew this was going too far now, they were much angrier than he had ever seen them before. Claire stepped back from Sirius in disgust.

"Besides the fact that Aubrey is about the dullest person I have ever met," Sirius growled, ignoring Remus' warning, "He's not good enough for you, Claire. We all know it."

"You can't tell me what to do-"

"Isn't he, Remus?" Sirius looked to him for support, "Tell me I'm wrong, that he's a good match for her."

Remus felt his mouth go dry, both Claire and Sirius were staring at him expectantly. He wanted desperately to defend Claire, he knew that Sirius was behaving like an ass in this moment. However, he wasn't wrong. Bertram wasn't good enough, not even by a long shot. It wasn't to say that Bertram wasn't a nice person, he definitely was kind and relatively intelligent. He just wasn't kind _enough_ or smart _enough_ or quick _enough_ to keep up with Claire.

"I…" Remus tried to find the correct words to answer honestly without driving Claire away from him, "I think that Claire should be able to decide for herself-"

"Answer the damn question, Remus," Sirius growled over at him.

"No…" Remus sighed, looking at the disappointment on Claire's face from his lack of support, "No, he's not."

"I told you," Sirius looked over at Claire who was still staring at Remus in disbelief, "We're all in agreement that Aubrey isn't for you. You're not going to Hogsmeade with him. Let's just go back up to the castle and move on with our day."

"How dare you!" Claire rushed forward and shoved Sirius in the chest, he stumbled backward. James quickly rushed over to wedge himself between them. Sirius tried to worm his way around James to get to Claire who Peter was unsuccessfully attempting to hold back, "How dare both of you!"

"We're just telling you the truth!" Sirius shouted while James pushed him further away from Claire and attempted to calm him down, "You'd think you want your friends to lie to you with the way you're behaving."

"You're dictating who I can and cannot date!" Claire broke away from Peter and strode over toward Sirius. Remus stepped in her way and she stopped dead in her tracks, she shot him a hurt look. Guilt seeped into Remus' heart as he tried to reach forward for her hand but she pulled away.

"So what if I am?" Sirius shouted, still struggling with James, "Someone has to!"

"All my life," Claire screamed at him, tears welling in her eyes, "I've been told what to do. Always wear a cardigan, don't wear that top, talk to those members of the congregation, read more, don't talk with my mouth full, always say grace, don't do magic! Don't be a witch! Pretend like I'm normal so no one knows that I'm the shame of my family!

"You're no better than him," Claire wiped some tears from her cheeks and glared over at Sirius, "Telling me who I can associate with, who I can date. I am my own person. I get to make those decisions. Not my father, and certainly not you."

"Claire…" Remus stepped forward to comfort her, she glanced over at him and then turned on her heel to walk back up to the school.

"I expected this from him," Claire muttered, "But I expected more from you."

Remus watched as she trudged back up to the snow toward the school. He turned and looked over in Sirius' direction. James was out of breath from holding him back and Peter had found himself beside them. Sirius was red in the face, anger still in his eyes. He slammed his fist up against the tree behind him.

"Damn it," He muttered, running his fingers through his hair.

"Damn is right," Remus shook his head in shame. What had Sirius gotten himself into this time and why had Remus willingly walked into it with him?

* * *

 **A/N: Hey everyone! Real talk for a moment, wedding planning is stressful and (thankfully for all of you) I cope with stress by writing. So... I'm posting a bonus chapter this week! Hooray! I will still be back on Friday with more. Thanks again for all of the favorites, follows, and reviews! I love all of the insightful things you have written about this story. It puts a huge smile on my face to see your feedback. I hope you enjoyed this chapter because I know I certainly enjoyed writing it!**


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Claire threw herself onto her bed after getting back from class. There would be some time before dinner started, but since her argument about three weeks ago, she had found herself spending more and more time in her dorm room. It had been a lonely three weeks. She had been spending as much time as possible with Lily and Mary but Lily had Severus to spend time with and Mary spent her time gossiping with Marlene. That left Claire on the sidelines to do homework by herself in the library and get into bed much earlier than she ever had since coming to Hogwarts.

She had tried to spend her time practicing defensive spells, but without Remus' help, she didn't seem to be able to make any progress at all. One particularly sunny afternoon, she spent the day alone trying to produce the Patronus charm but no happy memory seemed to be able to overcome the echoing loneliness she felt in her heart. She had actually regressed in her skill, not capable of even finding white wisps after repeating the incantation.

During classes, she worked alone or found herself partnered with the only other individual in class who couldn't be partnered off. She had stopped sitting with James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter at meals and took a temporary spot at the end of the Gryffindor table closest to the door. Occasionally Lily would join her, which made her feel a little less isolated until she began to feel that she might only be motivated by pity.

Somehow in the span of one truly terrible Herbology lesson Claire had gone from feeling that she belonged at Hogwarts and had friends she trusted to once more being the outcast she was when she attended primary school. She hadn't realized it until she no longer had a social circle that everyone else had their niche. By fourth year, social groups were already established and it was quite difficult to make your way into a new one.

Claire let out a sigh and looked out the window. It was sunny and beautiful, so beautiful that it felt as if mother nature was trying to juxtapose her mood. Somehow it was this cruel joke that she was so miserable but the weather called for everyone to be happy. She rolled away from the window, unable to face the sun's penetrating door opened and in walked Lily. She plopped her books next to her bed and glanced over at Claire with a concerned look. Claire rolled away from her, preferring the eternal happiness of the sun to the worry of her friend.

"Are you just going to lay here until dinner?" Lily asked, shuffling over and sitting at the end of her bed. Claire shrugged, "You can't hide in our room until we graduate in three years."

"I'm not hiding," Claire sighed. "I just don't have anyone to see in the Common Room."

"How long are you going to stay angry with them for?" Lily asked laying back on the bed beside Claire.

"I don't know… forever?"

"You miss them," Lily looked over at her, Claire avoided eye contact, "I know you do. You miss chasing after them about their homework, working with them during class, watching Quidditch with them on the weekends."

"Please don't remind me that I have no one to do those things with now," Claire said grumpily.

"I offer to do plenty of those things with you," Lily sat up on the bed and looked over at her, "You'd rather lay in here and mope."

"I'm not moping-"

"You're avoiding them," Lily shook her head, her auburn hair flowing around her, "If your friendship with them is over, you need to come to some kind of resolution and move on. You can't keep hiding in here and hoping that you don't bump into them."

"I-" Claire felt her heart sink, Lily was right. She had been saying this for the last couple of weeks. Initially, she had let Claire hide out in their room and avoid them, but after a certain point, she started asking what had happened. Claire spilled the details to her, glossing over some of the more painful things that Sirius had said to her.

"Do you want your friendship with them to be over?"

Claire hesitated, "No," She frowned, "No, I just don't know how to move past this."

"You need to ask for an apology," Lily put her hand on Claire's and looked seriously at her, "If they can't give you that then it's not worth it. I have complete faith that Remus will apologize… Sirius…"

"He's not that bad…" Claire felt guilty for defending him. He had been truly awful to her the day of the fight, she wasn't sure why her instinct was to explain that he wasn't always like that. She had spent a lot of time the last couple of weeks thinking about her friendship with Sirius, he was the first real wizard she had ever met. He had helped her with her trunk on that first train ride from London and he was her introduction to the wizarding world. She owed him a great deal.

On the other hand, Sirius brought out the worst in her. He pushed her buttons like no one else could. She had never been known to yell at people, push them, or say things just to get a rise out of them. With Sirius, though, she did those things. It was quite honestly embarrassing for her. When they got going in an argument it was almost as if a switch was flipped and she became this person she despised.

"He and Potter are insufferable!" Lily said shocked, "It's amazing that you have tolerated their behavior for this long-"

"Lily!"

"Sirius intentionally injured Bertram Aubrey," Lily continued, "That kind of behavior can't be justified."

"I know," Claire sighed.

"He behaved like a petulant little child," Claire winced, she felt so disloyal listening to Lily carry on about Sirius' faults, "If this was a one-time occurrence, maybe you could explain it away, but this is a consistent thing. He and Potter target Severus all of the time just because they find it enjoyable to torment him."

"I'm not saying they're without faults-"

"I think you'd be better off without them," Claire looked down sadly.

"They're my friends," Claire played with the end of the long braid she had wrapped her hair into, "Even with what happened, even when they behave like a bunch of baboons… I just wouldn't feel right here at Hogwarts without them."

"They have so many flaws, Claire,"

"Everyone does," Claire looked eagerly over at Lily, "I was there the day that Unforgivable curse was used on Mary, Severus was there. He stood around and let that happen and based off of some of the things you have told me… he might be heading down a dark path."

"Okay," Lily shrugged, "We both have very flawed friends. Maybe we should just spend time with each other, we'd probably be better off."

"I'm just as flawed," Claire lay back on the bed again, playing over the words Sirius had said to her repeatedly in her head.

"That's not true-"

"He said that I was leading Bertram on," Claire stared at the ceiling and said in a monotone voice, "That I let him help me in class because I like the attention that he gives me. He's not wrong."

"You're not leading Bertram on," Lily sat down next to her again, "You haven't given him any kind of indication that you want to date him."

"I do like the attention," Claire rolled over to look at Lily, "I haven't turned him down and I haven't said yes. I keep him at a distance but I still see the way he looks at me."

"There's nothing wrong with liking the attention,"

"It feels wrong," Lily gave Claire a sad smile as she spoke, "It's not honest."

"What would be honest?" Lily asked earnestly.

"What's honest is that I'd only go to Hogsmeade with Bertram," Claire smoothed her comforter out beneath her to distract from how embarrassed she felt saying this aloud, "If the person I really wanted to go with said no. It's not that Bertram isn't- he's just not…"

"He's not who?"

"He's just not who I want to date," Claire said flatly, hoping to leave it at that. Lily examined her carefully for a moment.

"You need to talk to Remus-"

"I didn't say-"

"You don't have to say it," Lily smiled at her, Claire looked away red in the face. At that moment Mary and Marlene came into the room chattering quietly to each other. Claire looked up and watched the girls carefully, remembering what it felt like to be that cheerful.

"What are you two talking about?" Lily asked, thankfully turning her attention away from Claire and changing topics drastically.

"Oh just the commotion in the Common Room," Mary said with a hop in her step, "James Potter and Sirius Black have challenged each other to see who can fit more pumpkin pasties in their mouth. James was already up to 6 when we came up here."

"Lovely," Lily groaned, rolling her eyes.

"We're about to head back down," Marlene primped herself in front of the small mirror by her bed, "Sirius was standing alone the last time I saw him, I might be able to talk with him for a few minutes before he gets preoccupied."

"Remus is down there too," Mary said pointedly at Claire, "If you want to join us, that is?"

"No," Claire said miserably, "No, I don't."

* * *

Sirius paced back and forth in the Hospital Wing. What in the hell was Madam Pomfrey doing behind that curtain and why was it taking so long? He glanced over his shoulder at Peter, who was nervously biting his fingernails and sitting on a chair closest to the door. James had run off to do Merlin knows what. Sirius just need to exhibit patience, the one quality he lacked even on the best of days.

Everything had been going fine recently, he had even accepted the fact that Claire was no longer a part of their social circle. It had taken more getting used to than he would have liked to admit, but after three and a half weeks of silence and plenty of avoidance, he had realized that she wasn't interested in forgiving him for what he said to her. He was angry about it for the first week, and then felt guilty for a couple weeks after that, but more recently he had transitioned back to feeling angry.

His shifting feelings may have been explained by how difficult it was on Remus. Sirius never said anything about it, but he saw the way Remus' face would fall each time Claire would enter a room and sit as far away from them as possible. He noticed the fact that Remus would hang around longer in the Common Room than usual near the stairs for the girl's dormitory. Even James wasn't oblivious to the fact that Remus had stopped doing his homework in the library because she wasn't around to go with him.

All of this was compounded by the upcoming full moon. Sirius knew that the days approaching were always difficult for Remus, he tended to be more lethargic, less patient, and overall less attentive. However, this week was different. Remus was incredibly irritable, his skin looked dull and pale, and he had fallen asleep during History of Magic for the first time ever. His gut instinct was that this full moon was probably going to be the worst that Sirius had ever seen.

When they snuck off under James' cloak in the early hours of the morning, Sirius had a sinking feeling that something was wrong. They made their way past the Whomping Willow and into the passageway that connected them to the Shrieking Shack. They finally arrived and Sirius' deepest concerns were realized. There was Remus, laying on the floor with huge gashes on his skin and blood pooled around him. Even when James called his name, he didn't respond.

Sirius sprung into action, wrapping Remus in the clothes that were in arms' reach and sending Peter ahead of them to warn Madam Pomfrey that they would be coming. Sirius and James carried Remus together as quickly as their legs would carry them across the grounds and to the Hospital Wing. When they arrived Madam Pomfrey was in her nightgown and her hair was fastened up in rollers. Even though she had clearly been asleep, she moved into action assessing Remus' wounds and pulling the curtains around him.

There hadn't been any updates since that moment. He could hear Madam Pomfrey working tirelessly behind the curtain but he didn't know what she was doing and if Remus was okay. All he could do was pace. Pace and watch as the sun began to creep its way into the room. Sirius turned as he heard footsteps, it was James.

"Where the hell have you been?" Sirius shot at him.

"I had something to take care of," James said quickly, "Has Madam Pomfrey said anything?'

"No," Peter added quietly, "She hasn't come back out since you left."

"It's going to be okay," James stopped Sirius in his tracks, "Madam Pomfrey is an incredibly skilled healer, he's going to recover."

"We were supposed to be figuring out a way to help," Sirius said frustrated with the entire situation, "Claire- we were supposed to be researching a way to help him."

"We can't feel guilty about that now," James said earnestly, Sirius began to pace again.

"I sure as hell feel guilty about it," James took a seat next to Peter and waited.

For what felt like an eternity, they sat in silence and waited for Madam Pomfrey to appear from behind the curtain. Finally, the curtain shifted and she faced the group. Sirius stopped and looked at her, hoping that she would have good news for them.

"He will be okay," Her typically bubbly voice seemed much more subdued than usual, "He is going to need a lot of recovery. There was a lot of blood loss, but I have applied some salves and potions and now we just need to give him time."

"Can we see him?" James asked, looking more solemn than Sirius had ever seen him before.

"He's not conscious," Madam Pomfrey said carefully, "I would usually say no, but given the special circumstances…" She stepped to the side and the three boys walked forward to crowd around Remus' bed. Madam Pomfrey pulled the curtain behind them to give the illusion of privacy.

"Shit…" James muttered, looking at Remus in the bed. He looked less terrifying with the blood cleaned from him, but he was still incredibly pale and the large gashes were still visible on around the edges of the pajamas he was wearing.

"How come it was so bad?" Peter asked, looking Remus up and down.

"I don't know," James responded. Sirius' stomach dropped, he felt as though he knew. If his suspicion was correct and the stress of losing Claire is what made this transformation worse then he knew that he was the reason it had been so bad. Him and his big mouth and impulsive actions.

"We need to tell her," Sirius choked out. He hadn't spoken to Claire in weeks, but he still knew that she needed to be here.

"Already done," James said. Sirius was thankful that James had done it so he didn't have to, "It's early so I wrote her a letter, hopefully, the rapping on her window will wake her up."

Sirius heard the curtain be torn back and in a blur came Claire. She was dressed in her pajamas, her hair unbrushed, and she wore no shoes or socks. Her eyes were bloodshot, Sirius couldn't tell if she had been weeping or if it was just from exhaustion. She looked at James for a moment before throwing her arms around him in a tight hug. James smiled and wrapped her in a bear hug.

"Thank you," She said when she finally pulled away from him, "Thank you for writing to me."

"There was no way I wasn't going to," James admitted. Sirius stood there awkwardly watching their reunion. He didn't know what to say to her or if he should even look at her.

"What happened?" Claire stepped forward and peered at Remus hesitantly. She placed her hand on his arm gently, almost seeming afraid to touch him in that it would injure him more.

"We found him like this at the Shrieking Shack," Sirius started, Claire looked up at him and they made eye contact. "He wasn't conscious, so we brought him here."

"Come on, Peter," James said placing his hand on Peter's shoulder, "We should go send a letter to Remus' parents." James looked over his shoulder and tilted his head in Claire's direction. Sirius got the message, it was time to bury the hatchet. There were more important things than holding onto grudges right now.

James and Peter left, pulling the curtain behind them. A silence fell over Claire and Sirius; he watched her as she gently stroked Remus' arm and sat on the edge of his bed. She stayed like that for a few moments before looking over at Sirius with sad eyes.

"What did Madam Pomfrey say?" She asked, sounding as though she was dreading what his answer would be.

"He lost a lot of blood," Claire closed her eyes, "He will be okay, but he is going to take a while to recover. She's done everything she can for now."

"He's going to be okay?" She looked to him for reassurance, Sirius rushed over to her as she stood and he pulled her tightly into him. Claire sobbed into his chest as he rubbed her back and tried to calm her. "Why did this happen?" She said between sobs.

"This transformation was particularly bad," Sirius hushed her as she sniffled and took a shaky breath, "There was nothing you could have done to prevent it."

"I haven't been searching for an answer," Claire looked up at him, her eyes seeming an even deeper shade of blue with her tears reflecting in them, "I have been so selfish these last three weeks. I've just been angry and hateful and now this happened…"

Sirius placed his chin on her head and pulled his arms around her waist. He could relate to how she was feeling. This was the same guilt he had been experiencing while pacing and waiting for Madam Pomfrey to share any news with them. He had felt responsible for Remus' current state. The reality was most likely that this was beyond either his or Claire's control, but knowing that didn't change how easy it was to feel guilty.

"You are not responsible," Sirius used hushed tones to try to calm her, "I promise you that you are not responsible. Remus is going to be so happy to see you when he wakes up."

"I'm sorry!" Claire pulled herself even closer to him, "I'm so sorry Sirius… for everything."

"You're sorry?" Sirius smiled at her, "I should have never- those things that I said… I can't blame you for avoiding me after that."

"Some of those things…" Claire stepped slightly away from him, Sirius felt suddenly very cold without her body so close to him, "Sirius, I needed to hear some of those things-"

"No," Sirius shook his head, "I was wrong. I was wrong about all of it."

She gave him a tearful smile and then turned to look at Remus again. Claire reached hesitant fingers forward and took his hand. Sirius watched in awe at how careful and gentle she was when she touched Remus. It was like watching someone handle a fragile antique. He didn't think he had the grace in him to ever be that gentle with anyone.

"Two years ago," Claire said quietly, "You and I agreed to work together to find a way to help him."

"I remember," Sirius watched the back of her head, wanting to step forward and wrap her up again.

"We need to move past our differences," Claire looked over her shoulder at him, "I still want to help him and I still want to do it with you. Can we do that?"

"Of course," Sirius wanted so desperately not to disappoint her again. He hoped that he could keep his temper under control long enough to fix the friendship he seemed to have broken. Claire gave a weak smile over in his direction. While still sitting on the edge of Remus' bed, she let go of his hand and reached behind her and intertwined her fingers with Sirius'.

* * *

 **A/N: Happy Friday everyone! As promised, here is Chapter 19! I'm so glad to be able to post this chapter and, as always, I'm so thankful for all of the reviews/favorites/follows. See you again next Friday! Enjoy!**


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Remus shifted uncomfortably on the couch. Even though he had been released from the Hospital Wing a week ago, he still didn't feel back to his normal self. Madam Pomfrey had given him permission to attend classes again, but only as long as he checked in daily so that she could treat his symptoms. He was mostly just exhausted, he had been unconscious for a couple of days but he woke to feel as though he had never been asleep at all.

Even though he had been in a great deal of pain, he was thrilled that the first face that he saw was Claire's. She had restrained herself when he opened his eyes and gave his hand a light squeeze, but Remus would have tolerated the potential pain if it had meant she would have given him a hug. They both simultaneously apologized to each other and once they were done expressing their own guilt over the way they had behaved, they began to chat happily again.

He hated being injured, but if getting injured is what brought Claire back to him he could handle a little discomfort. It felt great to have his friends reunited again. Claire and Sirius even appeared as if they had patched things up sufficiently. Remus doubted that it would remain peaceful forever, but it was good to know that they seemed to have moved past the things they had said to each other. Even James seemed happy that Claire was back and Remus doubted that was completely due to her help with homework.

"I win!" James shouted and the fire of the Common Room crackled taking any dampness out of the air on this wet spring evening, "What's my record at this point?"

"You're undefeated," Peter chimed in. Sirius groaned and slammed his hands on the table loudly. Remus jumped slightly and then grimaced. Claire instinctually reached over to him to make sure he was okay, he nodded at her and she turned back to her book.

"I almost had you!" Sirius whined at him, "Damn you, James Potter… damn you and your undefeated record at Exploding Snap."

"Don't be so bitter," James laughed, "You're just so desperate to win, you make silly mistakes."

"You're lucky you're my best friend," Sirius collected the cards and began to shuffle them, "Or else I would hate you."

"I love you too, mate," James chuckled, Remus joined in. He had promised Madam Pomfrey that he would try to get some extra sleep this weekend, but he would honestly rather be spending time with his friends than sleeping. Tomorrow was Saturday anyway, he could sleep in and ask for James to bring him back some breakfast. "Who wants to play me next?"

"Claire should," Claire's head shot up from her book as Sirius spoke. She looked at him, startled.

"Me?" She pointed at herself confused, "I'm not going to beat James."

"You're feeling lucky," Sirius said with a grin on his face, "I can just tell… come on."

Claire closed her book and walked hesitantly over to Sirius and sat next to him. Sirius handed her the cards and whispered into her ear.

"No tips!' James said angrily, "You can't help her while she plays."

"Why are you so nervous?" Sirius taunted him for a moment, he looked at Claire and winked at her "You have this, trust me." Claire nodded.

So the game began, the cards were dealt and before you knew it Claire and James were quickly moving around piles of cards and slapping the correct ones. They seemed very evenly matched, which surprised Remus. He hadn't realized how good Claire had gotten at the game. James was hyper-focused, his eyes closed slightly to better see each of the cards. Sirius was standing, with his hand in his pocket, cheering for Claire who had eyes as wide as an owl's.

Sirius coughed, and then suddenly James slapped the wrong card which exploded into a poof of smoke. Claire took the opportunity to reach forward and slam her hand on the correct card and then look up in shock. James' mouth hung open, he wasn't sure what had just happened.

"Did I just win?" Claire said, standing to look at the cards from a different angle as if the viewpoint would give her a different result, "Did _I_ just win?"

"You won!" Sirius shouted, shaking Claire slightly, "You beat James Potter! He is no longer undefeated!"

"I won!" Claire screeched and jumped up and down, Sirius let out a hearty laugh. "I won!"

"What just happened?" James looked over the cards again, trying to analyze what mistake he made.

Sirius reached forward and grabbed Claire. He easily lifted her up and hoisted her onto his shoulders. Once she was secure he took off around the Common Room, both of them yelling in celebration most likely waking up every other Gryffindor who had already gone to sleep. Peter stood and joined them in their ruckus. Remus stayed on the couch and watched the three in their celebrations, laughing as Sirius put Claire down and both Sirius and Peter bowed to her as if she was a queen.

"I can't believe it," James muttered, glaring over in Claire and Sirius' direction.

"I'm sorry," Remus smiled at him, "Better luck next time?"

"He helped her cheat," James said in astonishment.

"Oh come on," Remus countered, "You can't win every round-"

"His hand was in his pocket," James looked over at Sirius, who had picked Claire up again and was spinning her around in circles, "He used the Confundus charm on me."

Remus looked over at Sirius who had a bright grin on his face. Well, it was believable for Sirius. It wasn't a stretch to think that he would use magic to sway the game so that James finally broke his winning streak.

"I can't believe it.." James still sounded shocked.

"It sounds like Sirius to me," Remus chuckled.

"Look at him…" James pointed over at Sirius, he was wrapping Claire into a tight hug as she laughed heartily, "He must really like her."

"What?" Remus felt his stomach drop at James' words.

"I always thought," James sat on the couch next to Remus, still examining Sirius' behavior, "That if anyone fell for her it was going to be you, but I guess I misjudged that one."

"I-" Remus avoided looking at James and just studied Sirius instead. Did he like Claire? Did that explain his use of the Confundus charm? Did it explain his desire to get bubotuber pus all over Bertram Aubrey? The foul mood he had been in the three weeks Claire didn't talk to them? "You could be wrong… he could just really want you to lose."

"I could be," James said. Claire pulled away from Sirius' hug, but he interlaced his fingers with hers shortly after, "But I don't think that I am."

* * *

The sunshine shone brightly through a window that was thrown open in an attempt to welcome a breeze. Claire stood with her eyes closed, trying her best to focus on her happiest memory. She could picture perfectly the yellowing envelope with green loopy handwriting on it informing her that she had been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Her head had been swimming, she couldn't believe her eyes. Claire was capable of doing magic, it was like a dream come true.

Claire opened her eyes and took a deep breath before yelling "Expecto Patronum!". For a second she thought nothing was going to happen, but then she saw a handful of white wisps come out of the end of her wand.

"It's an improvement," Remus said encouraging her. Claire sighed, disappointed in her lack of progress. "You're getting closer, I can tell."

"I feel as if you're telling me that," Claire looked at him suspiciously, "Because you're trying to make me feel better."

"I'd do no such thing," Remus said shaking his head, he walked over to her with a smile on his face.

"Why isn't it working?" Claire leaned against the wall of the empty classroom, staring out the window. It had been almost seven months of attempting this spell and she felt no closer than she did at the beginning of the school year.

"It's a very difficult spell," Remus reassured her, standing next to her, "Most of the time students don't even attempt it until their seventh year."

"You succeeded," Claire corrected him, "I just don't know what I'm doing wrong."

"Maybe how much you want to do it is interfering," Remus spoke with an analytic tone. Claire could tell that he was genuinely trying to be helpful and give her feedback that would get her closer to succeeding at this spell.

"I don't know…" Claire muttered. She was beginning to feel a bit hopeless about it. There had been a week after she had been reunited with her friends that she thought she might be joyful enough to pull it off. However, the most she could get was the wisps. Stupid white wisps, they were useless.

"Or it's the memory," Remus said hesitantly.

"Getting accepted here was my happiest moment," Claire leaned her head back against the wall and looked up at the ceiling, "I don't think any other memory could compare to that."

"Okay…" Remus' voice trailed off. Claire looked over at him, he clearly was holding back with her.

"Spit it out," Claire said looking at him, "You have an opinion, what is it?"

"It's just…" Remus seemed to be approaching the topic carefully so as to not upset her, "I have no doubt that you were happy when you got your Hogwarts letter, but that also marked a change in your relationship with your father. That may be why the memory isn't strong enough for the spell."

"What else do you suggest I try?" Claire sounded desperate, she wanted this spell to work in a way that she couldn't seem to be able to explain to anyone. At first, it was just a spell she wanted to attempt, but then the longer she went without being able to accomplish it the stronger her desire became.

"Think of some other memory," Remus looked at her and pushed some hair out of her eyes, "Something that is only happiness."

Claire closed her eyes and thought through her life so far. There were a variety of memories from when she was little. Riding a bike for the first time, working on puzzles with her parents, being chased around the backyard by her father as she laughed heartily. All of them were happy memories on the surface, she was happy when she thought of them but she also felt a pang of regret. These happy memories had been tainted by sadness; they had been solely happy at one point but now they were nostalgic memories based on relationships that had been forever altered.

So she moved away from those memories and onto things that had happened at Hogwarts. Classes were a source of happiness, but they didn't seem to be strong enough. There was one memory she could think of that was pure happiness so she focused on it with all of her might. Claire took a step away from the wall, opened her eyes, and straightened her posture.

"Expecto Patronum!" A bright light flashed at the end of her wand, quickly that light began to shape itself into the form of an animal. In the blink of an eye, Claire was staring at a large white wolf. It looked at her expectantly and then slowly circled her, rubbing up against her leg in the process. "I did it!"

Claire looked over at Remus, his mouth was hanging open and his skin had gone pale. Something about his expression concerned her, her concentration on her patronus wavered and it slowly faded away until it completely disappeared. She looked at Remus for a moment before he spoke.

"What did you think of?"

"I thought about the first day I came to Hogwarts," Claire felt a smile creep onto her face, "The first time I set eyes on this castle… Meeting Sirius on the train, talking to James, nearly running you over on my way back to getting my book, getting sorted into Gryffindor knowing that I had friends already. It wasn't so much as one memory as all of my memories from that day... It was the most I've ever felt like I belonged."

Remus stared at her for a moment, she began to feel nervous under his stare. Why did she feel as though she had done something wrong? The spell had been completed correctly, she knew her patronus was a wolf. Nothing bad had happened. She couldn't figure out why he seemed so shocked.

"Is something wrong?" Claire stepped toward him and he immediately took a step back. Her heart sank.

Remus closed his eyes for a moment, Claire watched as he screwed his face up in concentration and then yelled out the incantation. A large wolf exploded from the end of his wand, it eyed her suspiciously before pacing back and forth in front of Remus who had now opened his eyes. Claire felt a huge grin appear on her face.

"We have the same type of patronus!" She said cheerfully, "Is that rare?"

"I don't-" Remus looked at her, still clearly confused about the whole situation, "It must be a coincidence."

"Why do you seem so distraught?" Claire approached him carefully and placed her hand around his. His wolf faded away and Remus stared at her in astonishment, "I think it's amazing that we have the same patronus. It would feel wrong if my patronus was the same as anyone else's."

The emotion behind Remus' eyes changed. What was once worry and confusion had now shifted to something much softer. He stepped closer to her and laced his fingers between hers. Claire felt her heart begin to race. Although she had expected him to stay still, he continued to step closer to her until he was facing her and standing only a few inches away. Claire looked up at him and she considered doing what Lily had told her to do months ago, tell Remus how she felt about him. There was no denying it any longer, she was far beyond just a small crush that could be suppressed.

What had been holding her back was the fear that he didn't return her feelings. There were moments, flickers of emotion in his face, that made her think that he did. However, there wasn't a way to be certain. Telling him would mean risking ruining their friendship, ruining her friendship with all of them. If she told him how she felt and he didn't return those feelings, she doubted she would be able to be around him anymore.

"I think that maybe," Remus said pulling his hand away from hers suddenly and taking a few steps back, "We should stop for today. You did a lot of work, you deserve some rest."

"Do you want to go to for a walk?" Claire asked, stepping toward him to close the gap he had created, "Take a loop around the lake while the weather is nice?"

"No…" Remus avoided eye contact with her, "The full moon is in a couple days, I should really go back to my room and try to get ahead with my assignments."

"Oh, okay," Claire could feel the disappointment in her voice. She turned to collect her things quietly, cursing at herself for not being brave enough to share the truth while she had the opportunity.

"Claire?" She turned around to see Remus behind her, he was hoisting his bag sheepishly over his shoulder, "My happy memory is the first day I met you as well."

With that, he turned and walked out of the classroom and back toward Gryffindor tower. Claire stood there for a moment in the classroom with a ridiculous smile on her face before she walked off after him.

* * *

 **A/N: Happy Friday everyone! I hope you enjoy this chapter! I haven't had a lot of free time this week, but I wanted to make sure I got this out to all of you. I can't wait for things to calm down and to have some more time to sit down and do some writing for you all. Cheers!**


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

"Tell me again what he said," Lily said quietly as they exited the library and made their way back to the Gryffindor Common Room. Claire sighed, they had tried to dissect Remus' words at least a dozen times in the last few weeks. It had become a constant topic of conversation between them in the moments that they were alone and not surrounded by friends or roommates. She didn't feel any closer to decoding the interaction than she did the second after it happened.

"That his happy memory was the first day he met me," Lily smiled over at Claire, "Don't look at me like that, it could mean anything."

"Oh come on," Lily elbowed her lightly in the ribs and shook her head, "That could only mean one thing."

"We are good friends," Claire was consistently fluctuating between believing that Remus liked her and convincing herself that she was making it all up, "Our friendship could be the happy memory-"

"You said he stepped closer to you," Lily interrupted her, her mind clearly made up, "He was only inches away from you, almost as if he was going to-"

"He didn't though," Claire felt her heart sink, this had been the sticking point for her all along. Everything in that moment was perfect until Remus suddenly pulled away and left the room. It was as if he had suddenly realized that he didn't want to be so close to her.

She had wanted to be close to him, it was all she seemed to be able to think about recently. During their most recent Potions class, she had completely messed up the assignment and ended up with purple smoke curling above her cauldron. Professor Slughorn went easy on her since she was usually so attentive, but she was embarrassed. James and Sirius had pestered her after class to figure out what had happened, but she wasn't about to admit to them that she had been daydreaming about what it would feel like to press her lips to Remus'.

"Maybe he did have homework to do," Lily glanced over at Claire, trying to come up with a good explanation for the unsatisfying end to Claire's story.

"Maybe he just doesn't want to date me," Claire avoided looking at Lily as she said this, she knew that Lily would never agree with that statement. It was one of the things that made her such a good friend, she was eternally supportive. However, that didn't prevent Claire from worrying that she had been reading too much between the lines and giving meaning to things that should be taken as they were.

"Do you actually believe that he doesn't want to date you?" Claire could hear Lily's voice beside her, but Claire was looking down at the ground analyzing the cracks in the old stone floor instead of looking at her friend.

"I'm not sure," Claire wanted to desperately change the topic of conversation, the first thing that popped into her head was Severus. In the last couple of weeks, they found they were either analyzing Remus' behavior or talking over Lily's concerns about the people Snape was surrounding himself with, "Any updates on Severus?"

"No," Lily sighed, clearly looking disappointed, "I worry that he's starting to actually believe some of the things his friends are telling him."

"Has he-"

"No," Lily said, answering her question before she could even ask it, "He's assured me multiple times that he doesn't think that I'm undeserving of being here. That doesn't change the fact that his friends feel that way."

"It also sounds as if you're the exception," Claire said carefully, not wanting to accuse Severus of anything and upset Lily.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean," Claire looked at her and adjusted the bag on her shoulder, "It sounds as if he might think that I'm undeserving of being here or Mary… or anyone else who is from a Muggle family."

"I don't think so," Lily looked ahead, avoiding eye contact, "Or… at least I hope not."

Claire turned the corner and saw the portrait of the Fat Lady, she was putting bright red lipstick on her lips and admiring her reflection in a small mirror. When she heard footsteps she looked in their direction and smiled at the girls.

"Good afternoon!" She said in her bright cheery voice, Claire couldn't help but smile.

"You're looking lovely today," Claire commented, admiring the bright lip color, "Red is really your color."

"Oh, I know!" The lady was flattered and gave a twirl around in her frame so that she could show off her intricate dress, "I love a bold lip, it really accentuates my features."

"It does," Claire agreed kindly.

"Fizzing Whizbees," Lily said with a smile as the Fat Lady finished up her lipstick and puckered her lips at them.

"You two have a lovely day," She said before her portrait swung out of the way of the entrance to the Common Room, "If you need any makeup tips, you know where to find me!"

Lily and Claire climbed through the portrait hole and made their way through the busy Common Room and up to their dormitory. When they opened the door, Claire noticed that Mary was sitting on Marlene's bed. Marlene was sitting beside her, eyes bloodshot and her nose slightly running. As soon as Marlene looked up and saw Claire she got up from the bed and ran to the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

"What on earth was that about?" Claire said, feeling as though she had done something horribly wrong that she wasn't aware of.

"She's just upset," Mary said in Marlene's absence. Claire could hear her weeping quietly in the bathroom.

"Marlene," Lily said standing close to the bathroom door, "What happened? Do you want to talk about it?"

"She asked out Sirius," Mary said very quietly, Marlene let out a sob in the bathroom.

"I heard that!" She shouted and then blew her nose loudly.

"Sorry!" Mary said in response, shrugging her shoulders when Claire looked at her for clarification.

"Marlene," Lily tried to calm her through the door, "You deserve better than him, he's a complete prat. You're a beautiful girl, I'm sure there is someone out there who would treat you much better than he could."

"I don't want to date someone else," Marlene said in a shaky voice, "I want to date him."

"I'm sorry," Claire said looking in the direction of the bathroom, "But what does any of this have to do with me?"

"You're friends with him," Mary shrugged her shoulders, Claire rolled her eyes. She had no control over Sirius and she would never have any control over him. He was like a walking talking hurricane; there was no telling what he would do or where he would do it.

"Sirius does what he wants," Claire added, "I just happen to hang around with him."

"Oh please," Marlene opened the door to the bathroom, her dark hair trailing behind her, "You could have put in a good word for me, but you didn't."

"I don't tell Sirius who to date," Lily shook her head at Claire as she spoke, indicating for her to drop it. Claire didn't see why she was going to have to take the blame for Sirius not wanting to date Marlene. The anger was completely misplaced if she was going to be angry with anyone it should be Sirius.

Marlene rolled her eyes and made her way over to her bed again, plopping down next to Mary who handed her some more tissues. Claire and Marlene had never been close friends, they were completely different people. They tolerated each other's presence at best. Claire was generally willing to overlook some of the more annoying characteristics of Marlene, but she certainly wasn't willing to be a scapegoat for her hurt feelings.

"Fine," Marlene said in a huff, dabbing some tears from her eyes with the tissues that Mary had given her, "If that's how you want to be about it."

"I'm not being any way about it-"

"We've all seen the way Sirius looks at you," Marlene's voice became shaky again and tears welled up in her eyes, "He won't date me because he's too busy chasing after you."

"What?" Claire looked to Lily for support, but she was busy trying to comfort Marlene, "Sirius is not interested in me."

"We've all seen it," Marlene had tears spilling down her face again onto her robes, "It doesn't matter now, he's all yours. I hope you're happy."

"I don't want him!" Claire said, feeling the panic rise in her voice. How was it possible she was taking the brunt of the blame in this situation? "This is ridiculous."

Marlene broke into sobs again and Mary rubbed her back. Lily glanced at Claire and gave her a sympathetic look while she whispered reassuring things at Marlene who was a sniffling mess again. Claire dropped her books by her bed and strolled out of their dormitory toward the Common Room again. Marlene must be out of her mind with grief, that was the only explanation she could think of for why anyone would have the idea that Sirius was interested in her.

* * *

Sirius stretched out on the grass of the grounds, letting the warm sun soak into his skin. They had just finished their final exam of the year and as a way of celebrating all of them had walked out to the grounds together to enjoy the beautiful weather. James had asked Claire repeatedly if she wanted to play Exploding Snap, but she hadn't played him again since the time she had beaten him. Sirius smirked as he watched James stand in front of Claire who was propped up against the tree with a book in hand.

"Oh come on," James begged, his voice sounding desperate, "Just one game."

"What part of no do you not understand?" Claire didn't even look up from her book as she spoke to him. James ruffled his hair in frustration, Sirius caught the eye of Remus who seemed to be enjoying their conversation.

"What are you not confident that you can beat me again?" James hunched over to bring himself closer to Claire, "So convinced that you will lose your winning title?"

"It's funny that you think baiting me like that will work," Claire said with a bored tone, "I am perfectly content to think that my last game of Exploding Snap was the one that broke your undefeated streak."

James grimaced and he collapsed on the ground in defeat, Sirius let out some barking laughter. James' loss hadn't been genuine, Sirius had provided a small amount of assistance to make sure that Claire won that round. It's not that he didn't have confidence that she could beat him on her own, it was more so that he was exhausted listening to James boast all of the time. His Confundus Charm really just sped up the inevitable.

"I can play you," Peter added in an attempt to be helpful.

"Alright," James said, not sounding particularly satisfied with this alternate plan, "You shuffle." James tossed the cards over in Peter's direction and gave one last woeful look over at Claire who couldn't seem to be bothered with his moping.

Sirius watched closely as Remus leaned over and whispered something into Claire's ear. A smile crept over her face and she finally looked up from her book to giggle at Remus. Sirius wondered if she knew that he had used the Confundus Charm on James. He hoped that she didn't; he could still picture the smile on her face when he carried her around the Common Room in celebration. She had been so happy, Sirius had wished that he could have kept that smile on her face forever.

Claire looked over at Sirius and gave him a small smile before looking down at her book again. He stood and wandered his way over to the tree and settled in next to her. Claire's eyes continued to speed over the pages in front of her as he cleared his throat to get her attention.

"You know that term is done and we don't have any more homework right?" Claire looked at him out the corner of her eye as he spoke.

"I'm reading for fun,"

"What could you possibly be reading for fun?" Sirius went to grab the book out of her hands, but she pulled it away from him and into her chest. He smirked at her, satisfied with her response.

"Shakespeare," Claire said quietly.

"Just some light reading I see," Sirius said sarcastically.

"What do you want Sirius?" She shot him a look, he chuckled slightly.

"I can't come over and talk to you?"

"Not without wanting something," Claire smirked at him, feeling as though she had the upper hand, "I'm confused what you could want though since you don't need to plagiarize any more of my essays."

"I just wanted to sit with my friend,"

"Your friend is over there moping about Exploding Snap," Claire pointed over in James' direction as he dealt the cards out to play with Peter.

"How about you just accept that I wanted to sit next to you," Sirius said continuing to chuckle, "And enjoy my presence?"

"Why do you want to sit next to me?" Claire looked at him suspiciously.

"I have my reasons," Sirius winked at her and Claire flushed.

"Are you going to let me read in peace?"

"Yep," Sirius leaned back against the tree and closed his eyes slightly. He drifted off not long after that until he heard a new voice in their group.

"Do you want to grab dinner with me?"

"Evans," Sirius looked up and saw James standing with his chest puffed out slightly and his usually messy hair even more ruffled in the back, "It's sweet of you to ask, I'd love to get dinner with you-"

"I'm not talking to you," Lily shot at him, turning her back in his direction and directly facing Claire.

"If I could make a suggestion though," James said maneuvering himself so that he was in Lily's eyeline again, "It might be better if we went to Hogsmeade instead of the Great Hall-"

"Never in a million years-"

"But if you're that desperate to date me now," James continued on with a smirk on his face, "We could make the Great Hall work. Maybe see if we could get the lights dimmed for some ambiance-"

"James," Claire snapped her book shut and looked at him, "Leave her alone and go back to losing at Exploding Snap."

"I wasn't losing!"

"Sure you weren't," James narrowed his eyes at Claire as he turned his back on Lily and sat back down in front of the cards Peter had dealt.

"So," Lily said taking a deep breath to regain her composure, "Dinner?"

"I think I'm going to stay here for a bit,"

"Okay," Lily said adjusting the bag on her shoulder, "If you'd rather stay out here with _them_."

"I don't appreciate the way you said them," Sirius growled at Lily, "Like we are some pack of wild animals."

"You practically are-"

"Oh my God!" Claire stood suddenly and looked excited, Remus stood as well looking slightly startled at her outburst.

"What is it?" He asked gently.

"I just got an idea," Claire was clearly attempting to remain calm despite the fact that she was practically bouncing on the balls of her feet, "Lily, I am going to head back up to the castle with you. I will meet you on the path up ahead, I need to talk to Sirius really quickly."

Lily shot Claire a confused look but headed up the path toward the school. Claire knelt down next to Sirius, her eyes bright with excitement.

"What was all of that about?"

"I need you to sneak me into the library tonight-"

"Me? Sneak you in the library?" Sirius pretended as though he was offended by this comment, "I would never dream of doing such a thing."

"Stop goofing around," Claire batted at his arm lightly, "I think I figured it out."

"Figured what out?" Remus' voice came from behind Claire, she turned to look at him with a large grin on her face.

"A way for us to help you."

* * *

 **A/N: Happy Friday everyone! I'm so glad to be back with another chapter this week. My life has become more and more hectic recently because of work and the fact that I get married in a couple of weeks. I hope to be able to keep on schedule for the next week or two and then most likely there will be a small break while I'm out of the country for my honeymoon. I hope that you all enjoy this chapter. Cheers!**


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

The steam from the train was blowing across the platform as Claire stood there awkwardly with her mother. This was the fifth year of school, but somehow her father still hadn't managed to find his way to the platform with them. She wished that he could have opened his mind slightly and come with them this year, maybe if he saw all of the witches and wizards he would realize that they weren't these terrible people he made them out to be in his head. They were just people going about their daily lives like anyone else, crying when they dropped their children off for school, chiding them for forgetting something in the car, and hugging companions they hadn't seen in a long time. If you eliminated the fact that they were able to do magic, they were just your average person doing their best wandering through life.

"Do you have everything?" Claire's thoughts were brought back to the present as her mother looked over at her. Their height had become much more equivalent since last year, her mother now barely had to look down at her to make eye contact. Claire took a silent assessment of her things, she had her trunk, owl, and a bag filled with books. Her mother had even packed her a lunch for the train this year, a turkey sandwich made on homemade bread.

"Yes," Claire said obediently, giving her mother a grateful smile, "Thank you for bringing me."

"You're very welcome Claire," Claire heard her mother's voice waver slightly, "Will you come home for Christmas this year?"

"I…" Claire looked at her mother, not wanting to upset her with her answer, "I will try."

"Your father and I," Mrs. Ludgrove said, wiping a stray tear from her face, "We would love to see you. I do miss you terribly while you're away."

"Mum," Claire paused and stepped forward to embrace her mother, "I will miss you too."

"Claire?" She stepped away from her mother and looked in the direction of the squeaky voice she heard, suddenly she noticed Peter a few feet away. When she looked at him, he waved and made his way over, his trunk scraping along behind him. "How was your summer?"

"It was great," Claire said, although her summer had been relatively uneventful. She had gotten a lot of reading done, which was nice. "Mum, this is Peter."

"Peter," Mrs. Ludgrove extended her hand and Peter hesitantly shook it, "It's nice to finally put a face with a name."

"Claire's mentioned me?"

"Of course," Mrs. Ludgrove looked at Claire hesitantly, "In the letters she writes to me, she always mentions you and the other boys."

Peter looked a bit startled by the news that he was mentioned, Claire smiled at her mother feeling proud that she was not only being polite but actively socializing in her world. Mrs. Ludgrove leaned over and gave Claire a peck on the top of her head.

"Please write," She said, sniffling slightly. Claire felt her heart swell looking at the emotion on her mother's face, she had always been so steely in the past when dropping her off for the train, "Will you remind her for me?"

Claire followed her mother's gaze over to Peter and he nodded eagerly. She felt as though she was really seeing him for the first time, a squat boy with watery eyes completely overshadowed by his friends. Claire prided herself on being attentive, but in that moment she realized how little she bothered with Peter. The realization felt as though someone punched her in the gut; she was a good friend to the others but not to Peter. She was determined to do better this year.

Her mother wiped a few stray tears from her face and then made her way through the platform and back out into the Muggle world that Claire had been so eager to get away from. Claire let out a sigh and then looked over at Peter.

"How was your summer?" She asked, realizing she hadn't written him once to see what his plans had been.

"It was great!" Peter said excitedly, "I spent lots of time with mum and dad and we spent some time on holiday in France. I tried to get together with the others but James was busy and Sirius never wrote back. I did see Remus briefly at Diagon Alley buying his books for this year."

"Well, I'm glad you enjoyed yourself-"

"I would have written you," Peter said a bit ashamed, "But I knew that your family…"

"It's alright," Claire said, reassuring him, "I still can't really have visitors."

"Your mum seems nice,"

"Yes," Claire felt guilty, in the process of becoming more immersed in the wizarding world and isolating herself from her father she had somehow also lost a connection with her mother. She had just assumed that she felt the same, that she had the same moral opposition to Claire's magical abilities. Did assuming that make her an awful daughter? Maybe she was both an awful daughter and an awful friend, "Both of my parents are good people. It's just a bit complicated at home."

"Have you seen the others yet?" Peter scanned the platform for a familiar face, Claire decided to do the same. She turned around and saw James coming through the platform followed by what she could only assume were his parents. "James!"

James turned toward the sound of Peter's voice and took off in their direction, his parents following slowly behind pushing the trolley that held his many belongings. As James approached, he flung his arms around Claire in a large hug that nearly pushed all of the wind out of her lungs. She felt herself relax into him, a level of comfort relieving any anxiety that she may have felt moments before.

"Have you gotten shorter over the summer?" He remarked, still hugging her tightly. She let out a stifled chuckle.

"No," Claire scoffed, attempting to push him off of her so that she could breathe again. In return, he hugged her tighter, "It seems as though you have gotten taller though. James… please, I can barely breathe."

"I've missed you too," He said laughing, messing her hair up with his hands quickly before pulling away.

"I never said I missed you," Claire attempted to fix her hair quickly, she wished her brush wasn't buried so deeply in her trunk.

"You didn't have to," James smirked, "Peter, how was your summer?"

"It was wonderful," Peter remarked eagerly, "I got to spend some time with-"

"I have some great stories for both of you," James interrupted as he ran his fingers through his hair and then adjusted his glasses, "Prepare to be entertained for most of the train ride."

"Oh, you must be Claire," Mr. and Mrs. Potter had made their way over to them now and Mrs. Potter walked over and embraced her, "Oh, and Peter!" She walked over and gave Peter a small hug and he smiled, slightly embarrassed. Mr. Potter walked behind her and shook their hands.

"Mum and Dad got to meet Sirius this summer," James added, clearly used to his parents social and bubbly nature.

"That poor chap," Mr. Potter shook his head solemnly, "Stayed with us for about a week this summer. His parents have some gall-"

"Fleamont-" Mrs. Potter gave him a stern look and he closed his lips tightly in response, this had clearly been a topic of conversation between the Potter family many times, "We have heard so much about all of you."

"Good things, I hope?" Claire looked over at James hesitantly. He smirked at her in response.

"Oh, yes," Mrs. Potter added brightly, "However, he didn't tell us how lovely you are! Isn't she just darling?"

"Yes, dear," Mr. Potter put a hand on her shoulder in an attempt to reign her in. Claire blushed and shot a look at James who looked sheepish.

"Is your friend Lily here as well?" Mrs. Potter scanned the platform briefly before looking at Claire, "I would love to meet her as well… James has mentioned her a bunch of-"

"Mum!" James stepped forward and gave his mother a hug quickly, "We need to load our things onto the train before it leaves."

"Oh, right!"

Mr. and Mrs. Potter helped them get all of their belongings onto the train. Claire attempted to get a moment with Mrs. Potter and ask her what kind of things James had said about Lily while he was home this summer, but James seemed determined to keep the two as far away from each other as possible. Before they knew it, they were saying their goodbyes to the Potters and making their way down the hallway in search of Sirius and Remus.

"So you've mentioned Lily to your parents?" Claire said while walking behind James, he stopped in his tracks and spun around to look at her.

"You say anything to her and I will be sure the first prank we pull this year is on you,"

"Alright, alright," Claire said in defeat, she hadn't been planning on telling Lily anyway. James turned back around and continued to walk, "I just think it's cute, that's all-"

"Shut up-"

"Our rough around the edges, James Potter," Claire ignored him and continued to talk, "Finally seems to fancy someone, it's some kind of miracle and I would know given my father-"

"Tell me…" James said looking over his shoulder with a slight pink tinge to his cheeks, "Get any letters from Bertram this summer?"

Claire glared at him, and he chuckled.

"I'd put in a good word for you," Claire growled at him, irritated by how quickly he could get under her skin, "But you'd have to stop being such a giant prat, which clearly won't happen."

"I don't need a good word," James stood proudly as he opened the door to a compartment that Sirius and Remus were sitting in, "I'm James Potter, I don't need help to get dates."

"Well, that's debatable," Sirius chuckled, joining in on their conversation without any context. Claire rushed over and hugged Remus who nearly toppled over from the momentum of her run. "Hey… be careful with Moony, he's kind of fragile."

"Moony?"

"Yes, it just came to me now," Sirius laughed and he patted Peter on the back in greeting, "I think it's a nickname that is going to stick."

"I'm strongly opposed to this," Remus said looking sheepish.

"That opposition will be noted," James chimed in, enjoying having fun at his expense, "And then promptly disregarded Moony."

Claire stepped away from Remus, embarrassed that she had hugged him for that long. Sirius glanced over at her and absentmindedly rubbed the back of his neck. She walked over to him and gave him a small hug, but when she went to pull away he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"You're not going to give Moony-"

"Is this really how you're going to talk about me from now on?"

"- A long hug like that and I barely get a hug at all."

"I prefer his cutesy nickname," Claire laughed slightly, pushing him away, "If you had one maybe I'd give you a longer hug."

"Don't tempt me," Sirius said waggling his eyebrows at her, making her giggle. "I will give all of us nicknames."

"Then you'll get your hug."

"Promise?" Claire crossed her heart with her index finger and gave him a pointed look. Sirius sat down in a seat next to James and they all chatted contentedly as the train slowly picked up speed and carried them to Hogwarts for the fifth time.

* * *

"Mr. Potter, would you kindly answer my question?" McGonagall was practically seething with anger as she stood in front of the fifth year Transfiguration students. Remus hung his head in embarrassment. It had been three weeks straight that his friends had gone silent during classes, it took a bit for the professors to catch on but now they were thoroughly irritated by it. The most irritated of all was none other than the head of Gryffindor, Minerva McGonagall.

James shook his head, lips pursed together. Sirius and Peter sat to the left of James, mouths sealed shut but amused smiles on their faces. Claire sat to Remus' right, avoiding eye contact with Professor McGonagall.

As their fourth year had concluded, Claire did some final research with Sirius in the library about Animagi. On the day of the end of term feast, she shared with them that the key to helping Remus during his transformations was to become animals. Apparently, animals couldn't be harmed by werewolves. Remus thought that he would be relieved now that they had a plan, but it actually caused him more anxiety. Now that it was here, he didn't like the idea of his friends risking themselves for him.

However, after the incident where he ended up in the hospital wing for a few days, he knew there would be no talking them out of it. Everyone seemed equally determined to become an Animagus. Thankfully, between James and Sirius' resourcefulness (some petty theft may have been involved) and Claire's research skills, they seemed to be able to collect everything they needed for the process. There was no other way to describe it than a process, it wasn't just Transfiguration that was needed but also potion making. Everything about it was intricate and required a painful attention to detail.

Upon finding out that you needed to hold a mandrake leaf in your mouth for an entire month, James insisted that they start right away. He wasn't about to let this process interfere with his ability to talk during Quidditch games, so their goal was to be done before the first match of the season. That left them with a month of being unable to talk during class; a skill which proved incredibly difficult for Claire.

"Miss Ludgrove?" Even with the lack of eye contact, Claire didn't get by unscathed, "You have been oddly quiet as well… can you tell me why vanishing an object can prove to be so difficult?"

"The difficulty-" Claire paused, her voice muffled as she spoke.

"What is in your mouth?"

"Candy," Remus was impressed with her quick lie but noticed that she blushed as she spoke.

"Ten points from Gryffindor," McGonagall strode toward the front of the classroom, her robes billowing behind her. Remus wouldn't have been surprised if he had seen steam pouring out of her ears, "I won't tolerate this nonsense in my classroom."

James frowned and then began scratching quickly on his parchment with his quill. When he was finished writing, he held the parchment above his head. Remus had to lean forward at his desk to get a good look at it. In James' untidy scrawl it said _But you're head of Gryffindor!_ McGonagall went stony-faced and she whipped her wand quickly, the parchment flew across the classroom and into her hand.

"An additional 15 points from Gryffindor for Mr. Potter's sass," Remus placed his face in his hands and shook his head, exasperated with this entire lesson, "For future reference, I expect better behavior from my own students instead of excusing their tomfoolery. Can someone else tell me the reason that vanishing is difficult?"

Lily's hand shot into the air as she gave a confused look in Claire's direction who was still staring down at her notes in shame. Remus nudged her under the table and whispered in her direction "You don't have to do this," Remus said as quietly as possible, she looked at him and shook her head, "I can get by just fine without you lot doing this."

"No," Claire's muffled voice was barely more than a whisper, "I want to."

* * *

The rest of class passed by uneventfully, Lily was able to easily answer all of the questions that Professor McGonagall had. Unfortunately, due to the inability to talk his friends weren't able to complete any of the spellwork which infuriated McGonagall even more. Claire attempted to do the spellwork with the leaf in her mouth which caused unclear speech but was unsuccessful in making anything disappear. By the end of the class, the Transfiguration professor could barely look at any of them except for Remus who she awarded a meager two points to for what he could only assume was her appreciation that he wasn't also participating in the silence.

"I never thought I would say this," Remus muttered as they made their way out of Transfiguration and headed back to their dormitory, "But I actually miss you talking."

Sirius draped his arm over Remus' shoulder and made a series of muffled noises that could only be interpreted as _we miss talking to you too_. Remus sighed, it was going to be a long week ahead of him. He watched as Sirius and James pantomimed to each other in the hallway and Peter laughed a couple steps behind him. Remus stepped closer to Claire, enjoying that they had a moment alone even if she had a hard time speaking with a leaf tucked in her cheek.

"Only one more week," Claire paused to try to form the sentences correctly without slurring, "Then you won't need to be alone any longer."

"I am fine with being alone," Remus lied, trying to sound convincing. Claire didn't look as if she was buying it, "I'd rather be alone so that none of you get in trouble or get hurt doing this."

"I am paying close attention to every step," Claire looked at him eagerly, a sparkle behind her eyes, "None of us will get hurt."

"It's not the spell I'm worried about," Remus shrugged, feeling a bit dejected about the entire situation.

"Remus-"

"What if you're wrong?" Remus shot her a look, frustrated that she wasn't willing to see reason, "What if I hurt one of you?"

"I'm not wrong," Claire adjusted the bag full of books on her shoulder, "I've done extensive research, I know that this will work."

"But what if you misinterpreted something?" Remus reached forward and grabbed her forearm, both of them stopping in their tracks. He looked ahead and saw Sirius, James, and Peter climbing into the portrait hole behind a couple of first years who must have said the password for them and toward the Common Room. "I would never forgive myself if I hurt any of you. This is too big of a risk."

"You won't hurt us-"

"Claire," Remus' voice lowered, he stepped closer to her to make sure he had her full attention, "Even if it's the most minuscule of risks, the idea of me potentially hurting you... I don't want you to do this."

"I have confidence that you're worrying over nothing-"

"You don't know what this is like!" Remus noticed a few second-year students making their way over toward them so he pulled her around the corner and looked into her eyes, "I have no control over what I do when I'm in that form. I am dangerous-"

"I don't believe that-"

"Believe it!" He shouted she stepped back from him alarmed at his tone, "Claire this isn't some case of dragon pox, I need you to know that when I transform I would hurt you. I could kill you."

"Remus…" Claire reached forward for him, but he pulled away from her disgusted with the truth of what he had said. She meant more to him than he would ever admit, more than he ever would have thought he could care for someone. Claire was the piece of himself that he never knew that he had been missing, the sunshine on his eternally rainy day. When he woke in the morning she was the first one he thought of and in the evening she was the last one he wanted to speak to.

He loved her with a fierceness that terrified himself, not because he was afraid of unrequited love but because he was afraid that she returned his feelings. He was a monster, there was no way around that. No matter how kind-hearted or generous he was most of the year, that wouldn't negate the fact that twelve nights every year he could hurt her. What if he woke one morning to find that he had killed the one person he now knew he could not live without?

"Please, don't do this," Remus begged stepping close enough to her that he felt her soft breath on his lips. "Don't make me wake with anxiety each morning after the full moon knowing that you could be lying wounded next to me."

"I'm sorry," Claire whispered, her gaze averted to the floor beside them. "I've already made up my mind."

"I know," Remus muttered, running his fingers through his hair, "I just wish I could talk you out of it."

Remus walked away from her and toward the portrait, he saw James poking his head out and looking around for them. When he spotted Remus he grinned and held up a piece of parchment that said _Enjoy your snog in the hallway? We've been waiting for you._ Remus sighed and walked through the portrait hole, glancing over his shoulder to see Claire blushing not far behind him.

* * *

 **A/N: Happy Friday again everyone! So, I get married in 8 days (crazy, right?) and I plan to have one more chapter for you next Friday. I'm already working on editing it as I type this so that it's ready to be posted on October 13th. However, after that, I won't be able to post a new chapter until November 4th at the earliest. I'm sorry to leave you hanging, but I promise you that I will be back and posting consistently again once things die down. As always, I'm always so happy to read your thoughtful reviews and see new favorites and follows. All of you keep me incredibly motivated to keep writing even when things in my personal life are a bit chaotic. Cheers and happy reading!**


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

Sirius was spending a lazy afternoon with James, laying around the dormitory and procrastinating on their homework. It was a beautiful fall afternoon and even though they would have preferred to have been outside, they were both feeling a bit down. At first, the idea of holding a mandrake leaf in their mouths for an entire mouth sounded like a lot of fun. They collectively decided to not speak during classes because why not? It didn't seem worth it to Sirius to spend all of his classes explaining his way around the fact that he mouth sounded full. Claire didn't agree to it, but James was quickly on board.

However, in the last few days, the fun factor of the entire situation had worn off. Holding the leaf in his mouth created more saliva than usual which meant all of them had been uncharacteristically drooly for the last four weeks. Although they talked outside of class, he was really starting to miss spending his time goofing off while his professors' backs were turned. Classes were dull without being able to complete the spellwork, it seemed as though his most interesting classes had all suddenly become the monotony that History of Magic had always been. Lecture, notes, trying not to fall asleep. It had been a long month, he was ready for it to be over.

This afternoon, Claire had drug Peter to the library to help him with some homework for Transfiguration. It seemed as though this year Claire was determined to help Peter be more successful in his coursework, Sirius wasn't sure how much good it would do. He applauded her for trying though. Remus had gone off to send a letter to his parents at the owlery. That left James and Sirius to lay on their beds and stare at the ceiling to count down the minutes until they could finally take the leaves out of their mouths. The first thing Sirius wanted to do was eat something, he missed the taste of food without the aftertaste of mandrake.

"Oh…" James said lazily with a small amount of drool dribbling from his chin, he wiped it away before standing and rifling through some paper near his bed. He pulled out a small piece of parchment and handed it to Sirius, "This fell out of Claire's books this afternoon. I swiped it before she noticed it was gone."

"What is it?" Sirius said in a muffled tone, hopeful that it would be something they could tease her for later. That was what he needed, a good prank to lift his spirits.

"Just read it," James responded, slurring slightly.

Sirius gave the paper a once over, he didn't recognize the scrawl. It wasn't James, Peter, or Remus' handwriting.

 _Claire,_

 _I hope your term is going well so far, I'm sorry that I haven't written since we got back to school. O.W.L. year is already incredibly serious and it's been keeping me busy, I'm sure it's the same with you. I was wondering if you'd like to get together to work on our Herbology essay._

 _Write back when you can!_

 _Yours,_

 _Bertram_

Sirius felt his stomach drop, he had only assumed that after the incident last year that Bertram had been avoiding Claire. He didn't see him speak with her during class anymore, but apparently, they had been exchanging letters. Why hadn't Claire told any of them about it? Sirius shoved the parchment back at James and shrugged.

He tried to ignore the fact that the letter bothered him. After the fight last year, Sirius was resolute in letting Claire make her own decisions. Even if that decision was some git from Hufflepuff who didn't have a backbone at all. If that's what she wanted, then he wouldn't interfere. Even if it took all of the effort he could muster to keep his nose out of it.

"Poor chap," Sirius said halfheartedly, "He doesn't stand a chance."

"What are you thinking about doing?"

"Nothing," Sirius sat up in his bed, "After what happened last year, I am steering clear of Bertram Aubrey."

"Oh come on…" James goaded him, "I know this is going to bother you."

"It doesn't bother me," Sirius rolled his eyes, "I'm indifferent about it. If Claire chooses to date him, that would be her mistake. I'll just be around to say 'I told you so' when it goes poorly."

"So that's it then?"

"What were you expecting?"

"At least some kind of harmless prank," James crumpled up the note and tossed it next to his bed. "I know you well enough to know you're not just going to let her date him."

"We're about to become Animagi," Sirius chuckled, "I'm fairly certain that if I get within ten meters of Aubrey and she hears about it she will turn into a lion just so she can maul me."

"Alright," James said flopping onto his bed defeated, "You're sure it doesn't bother you?"

"Why would it?"

"Because it's Claire…"

"And?" Sirius had a curious tone, "What's your point?"

"My point is," James smirked at him while he spoke, "I don't think you want her to date Aubrey."

"I couldn't care less," Sirius shot him an annoyed look.

"Sure…" James chuckled and lay back in his bed again. Sirius felt some irritation building, what was James insinuating?

"I mean come on," Sirius growled, "Aubrey is as entertaining as a damp sponge. It will never work, why would she waste her time-"

"There we go"

"He's so desperate too," He continued on, ignoring James' knowing comment, "I can't for the life of me figure out how behaving like that would be appealing to her."

"I agree," James nodded.

"So, I'm not wrong then?" Sirius said more to himself than to James, "She shouldn't date him."

"It will most likely end poorly," James paused for a moment, "Probably really poorly for Aubrey if you have anything to say about it."

"No way," Sirius shook his head animatedly, "I'm staying out of it and I mean it."

"You say that now," James rolled to the edge of his bed and rifled through his bag for a piece of candy, "Once that first date is set, I don't think you're going to be able to control yourself."

"I doubt he'll actually get the courage to ask her, it's been over a year and he still hasn't-"

"Someone will though," James smirked and rolled his eyes at Sirius as if he was aware of something that Sirius wasn't and was irritated he hadn't figured it out yet.

"Anyone other than Aubrey-"

"You're going to have a problem with anyone she agrees to date," James found a chocolate frog and worked on getting it out of the box, then shoved it into his mouth with the mandrake leaf.

"Why would I-"

"Oh come off it," James said with some chocolate in the corners of his mouth, "I'm your best mate you don't have to pretend with me."

"What would I be pretending-"

"You like her," James finished eating the chocolate and wiped his mouth with the back of his sleeve. "You have for a while."

"Claire?" Sirius scoffed, annoyed by the accusation, "She would only be so lucky."

"How many times did you write her this summer?"

Sirius' stomach dropped a bit, he knew staying with the Potter's would have its downfall. It means that James was privy to every little thing he did, which included writing to Claire. Okay, maybe he had written her a few times this summer. Honestly, his home life was so stressful that he felt like he needed to talk to someone who understood it. Maybe it was more than a few times, maybe he wrote every day. They were friends! If friends didn't write to each other frequently during the summer to keep each other sane, then how did they behave around each other?

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"Remus and Peter didn't hear from you at all this summer," James looked around for more candy, a twinkle in his eye. He clearly felt superior, knowing this private information that others didn't, "You only wrote me the once to ask if you could stay. I saw Claire's owl show up at our house every day for the week you stayed with me."

"So I wrote to her, big deal."

"And what about the hug on the train?"

"Oh come on-"

"I saw you wrap your arms around her when she went to pull away-"

"You're looking into things too much," Sirius argued, "You need to get a hobby."

"And you're just in denial," James chuckled.

"What about you then?" James' eyes widened a bit, worried about where the conversation was heading. "I've heard you murmuring Evans' name in your sleep."

"I'm sure it's just dreams where I'm arguing with her-"

"Nope that's definitely not it," Sirius felt much more at ease now that the pressure was off of him and onto James.

"Evans is so incredibly uptight," James waved his hand in front of him, trying to deflect, "The only way I'd ever be interested in her would be if she loosened up. That will never happen."

"Denial," Sirius laughed as he watched James' face go red. "I am willing to bet that you'll confess you love her before this year is done."

"I wonder what Claire would say," James lifted his head to glare over at Sirius, "If I told her you used a Confundus Charm to help her beat me at Exploding Snap-"

"I didn't-"

"She's a smart girl," James casually added in a mock threatening tone, "I'm sure between you intentionally sending Aubrey to the hospital wing and helping her beat me just so you could hold her hand-"

"We didn't-"

"She'd be able to put everything together."

"I'll rip that mandrake leaf from your mouth," Sirius hopped off of his bed and walked over to James, narrowing his eyes at him, "Then you'll have to start all over again for an entire month."

James laughed and shot Sirius a smile. Sirius felt a little relief wash over him, he hoped that this meant that James wouldn't tell Claire about the Confundus Charm. He wasn't exactly sure how James had figured it out, but he certainly didn't want Claire to know about it. She had been so happy that evening, he would hate for something he did to detract from that.

"Don't worry," James said with a sigh, "Your secret is safe with me… all of it."

"Thanks, mate," Sirius said slightly embarrassed.

"...You think Evans will be at the first Quidditch match?"

"Her loss if she's not," Sirius said, trying to contain the smirk on his face.

"Yeah," James added distractedly, "You're right."

* * *

Remus rushed through the corridor as quickly as his legs would carry him. He had looked in the common room already, but couldn't find Claire. He had thought that she would be sitting by the fire with James and Sirius by now, but apparently, she was still in the library. This was his last chance to convince her not to do this. There was no convincing Sirius and James not to become Animagi and he was pretty sure that Peter was only joining in because that's what the rest were doing. However, he was most anxious about others took risks all of the time, playing dangerous pranks on others just for kicks. Claire always kept her head down, she always did what she was supposed to. Doing this, becoming an Animagus, was not only dangerous but it was illegal. There was no way that they would just be allowed to register as Animagi at the age of fifteen, the Ministry would have some serious questions about that.

Setting aside the complicated magic and doing something the Ministry would greatly object to, he felt unsettled about the idea of her being around him while he was a werewolf. She was convinced that it was safe, but he would rather not risk it. He was unpredictable when he was in his other form, dangerous, violent, vicious. Any one of them could get hurt doing this, he hated of all of them, Remus was the only one with first-hand experience with werewolves. He knew exactly what the danger was and all of his friends were taking it so nonchalantly.

Even more so, he was worried about what would happen the next day. When Claire saw what he was like as a werewolf, she would be disgusted by him no doubt. Sure, she grew up as a muggle and didn't grow up being taught the biases against werewolves that many wizarding children were taught. Maybe that explained how unfazed she had been since the first day she put the pieces together and discovered his condition. At this point, she was clueless about the type of life that he would be able to live out. He would be a social pariah; his existence was frowned upon by most of society. Once she saw him, the real him, she'd realize that. It could change everything between them. No momentary relief that came with her becoming an Animagus would be worth the pain of seeing her look at him in that way.

"Hey, Remus-" Remus nearly ran Peter over as he came out of the library with a pile of books in his hands. Peter was a bit drooly from the Mandrake leaf in his mouth.

"Where's Claire?" Remus' tone was short, he was in a hurry. There was only about a half an hour before he was supposed to head over to the Whomping Willow. As soon as he got there, he wouldn't be able to put a stop to them all starting the process of becoming Animagi. They needed the light of the full moon to start the process; the irony wasn't lost on Remus.

"She's just getting her things-"

Remus threw the door open and ran past Peter and down a row of books, looking left and right to see if he could spot her. Finally, he made a left-hand turn and saw her at a long table picking up some stray pieces of parchment. There was a window behind her, the early evening sunlight giving her a warm golden glow making her look almost angelic. His breath caught in his throat for a moment, he stood there feeling as though he should rush but not wanting to move. Claire's long wavy hair fell down to her waist, swishing slightly as she moved. His legs seemed incapable of moving, Remus stood there frozen in awe of everything about her.

After just a moment more of watching her intently, he found his feet and walked forward slightly out of breath from the run through the corridor. This was it, he was going to tell her again how opposed to this idea he was. He was going to tell her how dangerous this would be and that he was not okay with her risking her well being for him. She looked up and met his eyes and Remus felt a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"What are you doing here?" She asked surprised, her words slightly muffled from the leaf, "I thought you would already be heading out." Claire was intentionally vague and he was extremely thankful for it since there were other students in the library. Not everyone needed to know that he spent every full moon at the Whomping Willow.

"I do have to head out soon," Remus struggled to find the right words, suddenly all of the preparing that he had done in his head didn't seem to be enough, "I really needed to talk to you before I do."

"Is everything okay?" Remus felt a pang when he realized how worried she looked.

"I just need to ask you one more time not to do this," Claire shook her head immediately, his stomach dropped, he knew that she was going to be difficult to convince, "Claire, please, I'm begging you."

"I've already made up my mind,"

"Unmake it!" He stepped closer to her, an intent look on his face. This was too painful of an idea for him to bear, he needed her to change her mind. Tonight would be difficult enough without worrying about her becoming an Animagus.

"No,"

"I don't understand," Remus spoke in a hushed voice remembering that he was in the library and that Madam Pince would likely kick him out if he spoke over a certain decibel, "Sirius, James, and Peter will all be there. I won't be alone, that should be enough."

"I've wanted to help you since our second year," Claire said quietly, reaching forward and touching his arm gently, "Please just let me follow through with this."

"Claire-"

"I hate fighting with you," She cut him off, pulling her hair over her shoulder, "Stop making me fight with you."

"I don't want to fight with you-"

"Remus-"

"I need you to understand," Remus reached forward and placed his hand on her cheek, "Thinking about you doing this is tearing me up inside. I love-" He stopped himself, to collect his thoughts before he continued, "I care far too much to let you-"

Suddenly, before he realized what had happened Claire stepped forward and pressed her lips to his. It took a moment for him to register the kiss, but when he did he stepped closer to her and tangled his hands in her hair. She responded earnestly, moving her soft lips on his while keeping the mandrake leaf safely tucked in her cheek. It felt as though a thousand butterflies had suddenly taken flight in his chest, his heart was hammering away. An eternity seemed to have passed in what was only a few moments. He wanted to stay like this, forever. Reality would ruin this perfect moment and he desperately hoped that time could freeze and they could continue on embracing each other like this. He would never become a werewolf and she would never need to be burdened by him. Reality was waiting patiently for both of them though, Remus knew that and so he broke away.

Why had he let that happen? Claire smiled up at him sheepishly, while panic set in for Remus. She was so beautiful and he was nowhere near deserving of her. He looked at his hand holding hers, the scars that lined his skin reminded him of what he truly was. What was the point in letting things go on in this way if it would only end poorly for Claire? He loved her too much to subject her to the looks that she would get and the rumors that would surround her when people knew she was dating a werewolf. This was his own horror to bear, he would not drag her into it.

Claire stepped away and blushed, she pulled the last piece of parchment from the table beside them and unceremoniously spit the Mandrake leaf out and folded it into the paper. Relief washed over Remus, she wasn't going to become an Animagus. He still felt queasy about the kiss, but at least tomorrow he wouldn't need to wake up knowing that she had put herself at risk for him.

"I won't," Those two words were enough for Remus, he reached forward and embraced her.

"Thank you" He whispered into her hair, resting his chin on the top of her head.

* * *

 **A/N: Happy Thursday everyone! I know, I know, I'm a day early. This will be my last chapter until November 4th. I will miss you all but I will be in Scotland for our Honeymoon and unable to get any writing done. I promise to be back to posting consistently after this brief hiatus. As always, your reviews, follows, and favorites mean the world to me. I can't wait to be back posting and sharing more of this story with all of you. Cheers and happy reading!**


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

"You ready?" Sirius heard James' voice as he removed the cloak from all of them. They had just stepped into the shelter of the Shrieking Shack on a truly terrible evening. The rain was coming down in sheets and the boys had been fortunate enough that Claire was gifted in charms to keep them from getting soaked to the bone. It felt weird to be there without her. She had been actively involved in this plan from the beginning, and even helped them with creating their potions so that nothing would go wrong. However, she wouldn't be becoming an Animagus that evening.

Although there hadn't been a good explanation, Claire mentioned that she had accidentally swallowed her Mandrake leaf. Peter had requested that she just get a new one, but unfortunately, the process was not that simple. The Mandrake leaf needed to be in your mouth for exactly a month and removed on the evening of a full moon. The soonest she would be able to complete it would be a month later. Claire was insistent that they go on without her.

Sirius wasn't satisfied with her vagueness. He felt certain that something, in particular, had happened. Maybe one of the Slytherin boys had bullied her again. However, Claire insisted that was not it and that it was all an accident. James tried his best to find a solution, but in the end, the boys decided to move forward with her guidance so that Remus wouldn't be forced to transform alone any longer.

Speaking of their werewolf friend, he was oddly quiet recently. Although he didn't typically participate in their pranks or goof off with them, he was particularly withdrawn. James had assumed that it was because he was uncomfortable with them becoming Animagi. Sirius supposed that was a good enough explanation, but still, something just felt off. His gut was rarely wrong about things like this.

There was no time to analyze anyone's behavior though. Since the moment they removed the mandrake leaves in the moonlight and added the other intricate ingredients, they stored their potion in a dark corner of the Shrieking Shack. The boys were certain that it wouldn't be disturbed there. However, their work wasn't done. Every morning and evening without fail at sunrise and sunset they needed to repeat the incantation to themselves until the night that they had an electrical storm.

That is how they found themselves in Remus' usual hiding spot in horrible weather with their wands resting on their hearts, all feeling a bit queasy. Sirius was more than confident in Claire's abilities but they were a group of fifteen-year-old wizards and one brilliant witch. How in the hell did they know that this was going to work in the way it was supposed to? On more than one evening, Sirius looked over Claire's shoulder at the books she was reading on the subject. After perusing the words on the page, it was clear that he should have kept his nose out of it.

They were all risking the possibility of something going horribly wrong. Maybe not enough moon rays hit the mandrake leaves, maybe the dew they collected was touched by human feet or had seen the sun, maybe they didn't recite the incantation correctly? If even the smallest mistake happened, they could become permanent half-human half-animal beings. Sure, James joked that he would look good as half of a lion but Sirius suspected that was more from the nerves of it all than anything else.

One thing was consistent, Claire's certainty. She was so confident that the rest of them could only be infected by it. It even seemed that she had Remus convinced that she had done everything correctly. He still didn't seem happy about it, but his worry was minimal.

"I'm as ready as I'll ever be mate," Sirius took a breath to prepare himself and held up the vial of his potion. At that moment, a flash of light went through the room soon followed up by a loud boom that shook the building. If this wasn't an electrical storm, he didn't know what was, "Cheers!"

James, Sirius, and Peter all lifted their potions and then closed their eyes. Collectively they all began to mumble to themselves.

"Amato Animo Animato Animagus!" Sirius tried his best to keep his voice calm and intentional. When he was done speaking, he lifted the vial of potion to his lips and drank it eagerly. The taste was slightly metallic, with an aftertaste of mandrake. Overall, it was quite nasty.

For a moment, he thought that nothing was going to happen but then the world began to shift around him. He felt his limbs stretch and shrink, the ceiling getting further and further away from him. His senses began to heighten, sounds became clearer and smells became stronger. It was all a bit disorienting so he decided to close his eyes until it was done. His body moving willingly but without his active involvement, but as soon as it had begun it was done.

Sirius opened his eyes again and looked around. He was much closer to the ground than he had been before. Did it work? Was he an Animagus? Looking to his left for James he was met with the image of a large stag. His eyes darted to the right to place Peter and instead saw a tiny rat. Sirius looked down and saw large black paws with shaggy fur covering them. It had definitely worked. They were all animals.

He opened his mouth to laugh and a bark came out instead. The stag's eyes shot open and then backed up slightly bumping into the wall and making a loud noise. The rat scurried around rapidly, panic in its eyes. This was so cool. Sirius couldn't believe that they had actually made this happen. Claire had made this happen so that they could help Remus.

Looking over at James, Sirius saw him stomp his foot and make a huffing noise through his nose. Somehow, he seemed to pick up on this cue and determine it meant 'Did we actually do this?'. Sirius barked in response and Peter let out a squeak. How did they know what each other was trying to communicate? It felt almost like instinct as opposed to anything they had prepared for or were actively trying to do.

After about ten minutes or so of their weird form of communication, they all decided it would be best to transform back. Sirius closed his eyes to focus and then began to feel his body turn back into the form of a fifteen-year-old boy. When everything seemed to be over, he opened his eyes and took a look at James who was just losing his antlers.

"Woah," James said in a slightly disoriented manner. Peter was sitting on the ground in stunned silence.

"Indeed," Sirius let out a nervous laugh. Part of him was impressed with their ability to pull of this off. Somehow they had managed to not only steal the ingredients they needed without being detected but they became unregistered Animagi without getting caught.

"I suppose we should thank Claire," Peter squeaked, his voice cracking.

"Yeah…" James ran his fingers through his hair, it sticking up on its ends in the back.

"I can tell her that I finally have those nicknames I promised her at the beginning of the year," Sirius smirked. Moony, Padfoot, Prongs, and Wormtail. Marauders of ingredients, pranksters, and now officially Animagi.

* * *

The evening was beginning to die down, the last embers of the fire in the Gryffindor Common Room fizzling out into the darkness, Claire sat next to Sirius on the couch as James snored quietly on the floor and Peter scrambled to copy notes from Remus across from them. A book was strewn across her lap, her hands resting gently on the pages. She felt incredibly nervous in that moment. Although she was surrounded by her friends, she had convinced herself that this was the evening she was finally going to do it. She was going to approach Remus about their kiss. All she needed to do was get him alone for a few moments.

Ever since the day in the library, Claire had felt as though she had been floating around on a cloud. Remus had finally kissed her. After years of wishing that he would initiate it, she had thrown caution to the wind and pressed her lips against his. It was if the entire world had stopped spinning around them. Not only had he accepted her kiss, but he had returned it earnestly. For a solid week, she felt as though she could not stop smiling.

However, the buzz of excitement passed with time and she realized that she and Remus never properly addressed it. There had been no repeat of their kiss and no discussion of what it meant for their friendship. The more time that passed the more certain she became that they needed to talk about it, to figure out how they planned on moving forward. Did they tell their friends? Did they try to keep it a secret for longer to have some time to just enjoy whatever _this_ was? Claire knew that as soon as James and Sirius were told they wouldn't hear the end of it.

An elbow nudged her in the ribs, she looked around in annoyance and saw Sirius smirking at her out of the corner of her eye, Claire turned her head in his direction and raised her brow in question. Why did he need to be so relentlessly annoying all of the time? He was quite the expert in interrupting her thoughts at the wrong moments.

"You alright there Ludgrove?" Sirius asked quietly.

"Yes," Her face was quizzical as she spoke, Sirius chuckled slightly, "I'm fine."

"You sure about that?" His hand motioned to the book in her lap, "You've been staring at the same page for about the last twenty minutes."

"I haven't-"

"Oh come on," Half of Sirius' mouth turned up in a smile, "Let's not do this thing where you lie to me. For one thing, you're not very good at it are you?"

"Why are you watching me read anyway?"

"Well I see- and hear- Prongs snore every night," Sirius shrugged, casually running his fingers through his hair, "And if I wanted to watch Peter copy Remus' essay all I need to do is go to the library with them any other day of the week."

"So I'm your form of entertainment?" Claire said with a hint of disgust in her tone.

"Essentially, yes," Claire felt herself roll her eyes as he spoke, "Oh come on, name one other thing I could be doing right now.."

"You need a hobby-"

"You know," Sirius said shaking his head, "You have this innate ability to take something that should be a compliment and turn it into an insult to get offended by."

"Oh give me a break-"

"Done!" Peter interrupted them by rolling his essay up and giving Remus a seemingly loud pat on the back. The sudden noise woke James who stared dumbfounded at all of them with heavy lids and bloodshot eyes, "Thanks, Remus,"

"No problem," Remus stood and stretched, "I think it's about time for sleep, don't you all?"

Claire felt panic begin to rise in her chest, she was going to miss her opportunity to talk to him. The boys began to collect their things, Sirius' eyes still peeled to Claire as she sat rooted to her spot. James didn't bother to collect his things and just shuffled off to bed with a grunt.

"Claire, what's going on with you?" Sirius squatted down in front of her, bringing his eyes level with hers, "Are you sure you're alright?"

"I- I'm fine," Claire shrugged, trying to keep her face neutral, "Just tired,"

"If something's wrong-"

"Claire, could I talk to you briefly before heading up to the dormitory?" Remus' voice broke through her haze, she tore her eyes from Sirius to look in his direction. He stood with his hand absentmindedly rubbing the back of his neck. Watching him, it was difficult for her to take deep and fulfilling breaths.

"Sure…" Her shaky hands closed the book in her lap.

"This isn't done- we're talking about this more tomorrow-"

"Who is going to grab James' stuff?" Peter interrupted Sirius looking at the books on the floor. Sirius shrugged before standing and grabbing James' things and following Peter up the stairs. Claire watched over her shoulder as they went, catching Sirius' concerned eyes as he closed the door to their dormitory.

With difficulty, she pried herself from the couch and stood to look at Remus. For some reason, it felt like the kind of conversation to have while standing. It wasn't that she was necessarily anticipating for him to kiss her again, but she wouldn't be completely opposed to it either. With delicate hands, she placed the book she had been holding onto the table and then felt suddenly unsure of what to do with her hands. To solve the problem, she shoved them deep into the pockets of her robes.

"Remus," Her voice was quiet, barely a whisper but echoing in the mostly silent room, "I've been meaning to talk to you, I just wasn't sure where to begin-"

"Claire," He stepped forward slightly and then stepped back almost immediately, "Before you say anything-"

"I-" Claire blushed deeply looking at him, she took a few steps forward around the coffee table, "Remus, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. I mean I already thought about you a lot- but since that day… It's been particularly-"

"Please, just let me say this-"

"Remus I like you so much," Her steps led her directly in front of him, grasping onto his hands in earnest, "I have for some time now."

His green eyes searched her for a moment, looking painful for a moment and then turning distant and cold. Claire felt her stomach drop, something was wrong. What was it? Did she say the wrong thing? Was she pushing too hard? Her mind began to race, thinking through every word that had spilled out of her mouth. She couldn't exactly place what was wrong, but her gut told her that she had somehow messed up.

"I think that maybe we should sit," Remus' voice was relatively monotone, he pulled his hands from hers.

"No-" Claire gave him a concerned look, "I'm fine standing. Remus, is something wrong?"

"Claire," His eyes darted off to the left toward the last couple of flickering embers in the fire, "Our friendship means the world to me."

"It means the world to me too-"

"I want you to know that I'd never intentionally hurt you," Claire could somehow hear the blood rushing in her ears. What on earth was happening? She had such a horrible feeling about this entire conversation.

"I know that you wouldn't,"

"I think that you misinterpreted what happened-"

"Misinterpreted?"

"We are friends," Remus looked at her sharply, "We are _only_ friends."

Only friends? Claire blinked and in that moment she could see herself kissing him in the library. She could hear his laughter echoing in her head as she told a bad joke. She could feel the warmth of his arms around her as he pulled her into a hug. Of course, they were friends, but there had been so much more lingering under the surface. She thought that he knew that? That's why he had not only returned the kiss she initiated but also stepped in closer to her, hands tangling in her hair.

What on earth was there to misinterpret about the kiss they shared? Suddenly she felt as though she was going to fall through the floor. None of this was supposed to be happening. They were supposed to be talking about how to move forward not how to move back to how things used to be. Her brain was swimming with memories and panic, it was becoming difficult to keep herself above the surface.

"Kissing you," Was it just her imagination or was he avoiding eye contact with her? Claire felt her eyes begin to sting with tears, "It was a mistake. I shouldn't have let it happen."

"A mistake?"

"I think that it would be best if we pretend that it never happened-"

"Remus!"

"I understand that you might need some time," He looked at her momentarily before letting out a sigh, "But I'm hoping that we can remain friends."

"Why are you doing this?" She angrily brushed away some tears that began falling down her cheeks, "Remus, I know that I'm not making this up- what I felt, you had to have felt that too."

"Please don't make this more difficult than it needs to be-"

"No!" Claire stepped forward and tried to reach for his hand, he snatched it away, "You're the one making this more difficult. You're trying to protect me from something, I can just feel it but I'm not willing to give up on this. I choose you, I don't care about the rest of it-"

"I _don't_ like you," Remus blurted out much too loud. Claire stumbled backward slightly, her hands dropping to her side, "Not like that. I'm sorry if you feel that I mislead you."

Was it possible to actually feel your heart ripping in two? If so, Claire was certain that was exactly the feeling she had in her chest in that moment. He didn't like her. This entire time she had been projecting her own feelings about the kiss onto this situation. In her head, she had been playing out the conversation she would have with him. Never in a million years did she imagine that he would tell her that this had all been a big mistake. Why had she been so optimistic to think that this would actually happen?

Tears rushed freely down her face. Claire attempted to stifle a sob as she looked at him. His breathing was short and shallow, but his body remained motionless and stiff. Her eyes took in his appearance, the beautiful green eyes that were overshadowed by scarring on his face. His lanky and tall frame. The worn and weathered hands that kept hers warm on so many occasions. He was everything that she wanted, but somehow he didn't feel the same way.

"I have to go to sleep," Sniffling she turned on her heel and rushed up the stairs to her dormitory, never looking over her shoulder once.

* * *

 **A/N: Hello everyone! I'm so sorry for my extended absence, things have been so crazy the last month that I wasn't able to get any writing done. However, I am back now and hope to be able to get on a regular posting schedule once again. Thanks, as always, for the favorites/follows/reviews it means the world to me. Cheers and happy reading!**


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

A cool air still lingered in the castle as winter slowly faded into spring. The soon approaching O.W.L. exams had taken a toll on the overall mood of the students in their fifth year. Classes became more intense and professors began to assign more homework in preparation. Although the appropriate response would be to hunker down and spend more time in the library, the Marauders- what a _ridiculous_ name Sirius had given themselves- had a completely different approach.

Remus would have typically been adamantly opposed to their shenanigans as a Prefect but he was desperate for a distraction from the foul mood he had recently forced upon himself. Everything with Claire was a mess. He had known that he would need to put a stop to their relationship before it even began, but he hadn't realized how difficult the aftermath would be on him. After their kiss in the library, he felt like the best thing to do would be to avoid it. If he pretended like it never happened maybe she would do the same, but he continued to find himself alone with her.

She would approach him in the library, take a seat by him in the Common Room, gently graze his hand while passing over the plate of roasted potatoes at dinner. Each time, his heart would leap, pounding wildly against his ribcage in excitement at just the tiniest glance from her. Then he would take a few moments to remind himself why things could never work out. Claire could never be subjected to the type of scrutiny that would come from dating a werewolf. He was sure she would insist that it was fine and that he was overreacting, but he knew just how much she would have to give up if they were to work out in the long term.

He had accepted long ago that his life was destined to be one of a nomad. It was the type of life that his parents lived before he came to Hogwarts; as soon as people became suspicious of his monthly absences from school or the noises they heard in the night on the full moon they would be on the move. The process of packing up their belongings and driving to a new location became so seamless that they had barely needed to think about it anymore. Neither of his parents held permanent jobs, their home was frequently small flats that could be leased on a month to month basis. That was the life that was awaiting Remus upon graduation. There was no room in that life for someone else, it would just mean dragging them down with him.

The kiss he had shared with her was a moment of complete and total abandonment of the consequences that lingered in the back of his mind. When her lips touched his, he had nearly forgotten who he was and what he was doing. It was as if the entire world fell away and all that was left was the two of them. Remus cared deeply for Claire, more than he had ever expected to care for anyone. He had put off for as long as possible discussing the kiss, procrastinating something that he knew was bound to be painful for both of them. The conversation could not be put on a permanent hiatus and that was how he found himself feeling as though the air had been wholly removed from his lungs as she sobbed in front of him in the darkness of the Common Room before rushing back up to the safety of her bed.

He regretted everything about the moment. It had always been a belief of his that he would experience the suffering of unrequited love; loving someone from a distance and knowing they would never return the same feelings. However, that turned out to be the preferable option; there was no risk of hurting anyone other than himself in that scenario. What was much more painful was the hurt that came from two individuals caring for each other so deeply that their entire world was consumed by the feeling but knowing that they were not meant to be. That was the hurt that had settled into Remus' chest and had taken up permanent residence.

Never before had he been so disgusted with himself. Claire was his best friend, the one true joy in his world and he didn't know how he was going to possibly dissuade her from progressing their romantic relationship. While she would never admit it, the girl was determined and stubborn. If she decided that his reason for them not trying wasn't good enough, she would likely ignore him completely and insist that they continue. Remus knew he was not strong enough to say no if she insisted. In the end, he decided that the only way to put a stop to it completely was to tell her that he had no feelings for her. The thought caused knots to form in his chest but he knew that no matter how backward it sounded the only way to protect her was to break her heart.

In the days following their conversation, Remus wondered how he was going to manage to look her in the eye. Thankfully their other friends had no idea what had happened which forced both broken-hearted individuals to go about their days as if nothing was wrong. There were slight shifts in their dynamic, Claire took up residence next to Lily in all of their classes insisting that it was easier for her to focus next to her roommate rather than the Marauders. She no longer sat next to Remus during meals and she had spent more time doing homework in her room insisting that the library had gotten too crowded with exams looming in their future.

Remus, on the other hand, had completely abandoned the responsibility he had thrust upon him as a Prefect and found himself participating in more pranks with James and Sirius. His two friends were so ecstatic by his enthusiasm that they barely acknowledged the diminished presence of Claire in their everyday lives. It had been Remus' idea to develop a map of the castle, making it easier for them to wander around undetected in the evenings past curfew. Sirius had done some researching without the help he had requested from Claire ("Honestly, Sirius if you want to break the rules then do it yourself!") and determined that they could get the map to show actual individuals wandering the castle so they could avoid unwanted attention.

That was why Remus found himself standing in a dark hallway on an early Spring evening while James and Sirius stood nearby sketching the layout of this corner of the castle just by the tiny amount of light coming from the end of their wands. Peter stood at the other end of the hallway, nervously twiddling his thumbs on the lookout for patrolling Prefects or the stray professor heading back to their living quarters for the evening.

"Are you done yet?" Peter squeaked a slight shake in his already nervous voice.

"Keep calm Wormtail!" James hissed at him as he looked over Sirius' shoulder at what he was drawing, "Don't forget that there's a secret passageway over in that corner."

"If you could keep the light in the same spot for one minute and stopped breathing down my neck I would already be done," Sirius chuckled as he continued to scratch his quill against the parchment. The large yellowed piece was stretched out against the wall, James holding one corner and Sirius with his palm firmly on the other end as he drew as quickly as possible.

"I think I hear footsteps," Peter whimpered.

"Hurry up Padfoot!"

"I already am hurrying!"

"I say we try again tomorrow-"

"Grow a backbone Peter!" Sirius growled in a low voice.

"He's right, I hear footsteps," Remus clutched his wand and moved toward the hidden passageway at the end of the hall. On his way, he grabbed James' sleeve to indicate that they needed to move into a hiding place until the corridor was clear again.

"Just two more seconds!"

"No, we have to move," Remus' heart was racing, this had been his idea but now that there was the possibility of getting caught he wasn't ready to lose his Prefect's badge just because he wasn't capable of coping with a broken heart. How idiotic had he been to think this was a good idea?

"Give him a chance to finish-"

"Now, James" Peter had already scurried off, finding his way into the closest hiding spot.

"None of you have any patience-"

"Some of us would rather stay a student here and not get expelled-"

"I'm finished, all of that was worry about nothing-" Sirius' voice stopped as footsteps got closer. With a flick of his wand and a quiet, "Nox!" The boys rushed off in hushed steps toward the secret passageway behind the one-eyed witch. Short of breath, they waited to see who would pass. In the darkness, they made out the shadow of someone who appeared to be their age who was holding a folded piece of parchment in hand.

Remus looked at Sirius who raised his brow in question. James shook his head silently, unsure of who had interrupted them. As this mystery person continued down the hallway they passed by a window. The moonlight illuminated their face and Remus immediately recognized the student as Bertram Aubrey. What on earth was he doing out of bed past curfew? It didn't seem like the Hufflepuff to break the rules.

"Aubrey?" Sirius whispered, leaning forward to get a better look while squinting his eyes.

"What do you know," James responded with a smirk, "Maybe he's not as boring as we thought he was."

"It looks like some parchment in his hand," Peter added, not as quietly as Remus would have liked so he shushed him.

"Parchment?" Sirius chuckled, "I see you were a bit premature with your comment Prongs, he really is truly as boring as we thought he was."

"I wonder why he needed to be out and about with notes past curfew," James added with suspicion in his voice.

"Who cares," Sirius shrugged, he unfolded the map in his hands and took a look at his handiwork. After weeks of late nights and close calls, the map was finally completed. James illuminated the tip of his wand again so everyone could get a better look. Remus had to give credit to Sirius, he did a phenomenal job of sketching out the castle. There was no corner that was missing or passageway that they had left unsearched, it seemed as though they had drawn out every known inch of the castle, "Alright… let's give this a shot, shall we?"

Sirius rolled up his sleeves and pulled his wand from his back pocket, and motioned for Remus and Peter to hold it outstretched in front of him. A focused look took over his face, one that Remus had quite certainly never seen before. James stood holding his wand to keep the map properly lit an excited glint in his eyes. Remus wasn't quite sure that it was going to work, this was magic they had never practiced during class before and it was quite possible that when Sirius attempted it they could lose all of their hard work in a poof of smoke. He thought of Claire and what she might have to say about this map and it's intended purpose. Just the thought of her disapproving face caused a searing pain to work its way through his chest.

"Okay, go ahead," Remus responded, urging the feeling to dissipate.

"Animari" Sirius drew his wand in a counterclockwise circle and then punctuated it with a tap on the parchment. For a moment, it seemed as though nothing had happened but then Remus saw some movement out of the corner of his eye.

"Sweet Merlin…" James stepped forward and nearly pressed his face to the parchment to get a better look.

"Is that..?"

"That's Filch walking with Aubrey back to the Hufflepuff Common Room," Sirius let out a quiet whoop, "It worked!"

"So what are we going to use this for first?" Remus said with a smirk for the first time in weeks feeling as light as a feather.

* * *

Claire panicked as she heard the door to her dormitory open and she shoved the letter she had been holding between her trembling fingers underneath her pillow. Looking over her shoulder she noticed Lily walk into the room in a huff and drop her bags onto her bed. Her face was nearly as red as her hair was, her lips pressed into a fine line. Claire appraised her for a moment, wondering if it would be best to leave her alone or to question what was going on.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Claire's voice was hesitant, worried that she was just going to make it worse.

"How you even manage to be friends with Potter is beyond me!" Lily yelled opening her bag and angrily pulling books from it and then flopping them loudly onto the floor by her feet.

"You might need to give me a bit of context-"

"That arrogant, self-centered, manipulative bully has been a thorn in my side since my first year," She began to move books she had already relocated, just following through with the action for the sake of moving, "It is incredible that you haven't hexed him into next week… you deserve sainthood for that!"

"Well, Saint Claire does have a ring to it-"

"All he does is brag about himself and his Quidditch skills," Lily started to pace across the room, her hands running shakily through her hair, "Goofing off with Black as if they own this place and their mere presence is a gift for everyone in Gryffindor. Let me tell you, it's no gift. They make my job as a Prefect so much harder than it has to be- oh and poor Remus, they call him their friend but he has to choose to look the other way. It's either follow through with his responsibilities as Prefect or keep loyalty to his friends and of course- _of course_ , he chooses them. So I'm left to be the only one to show any authority-"

Claire winced at Remus' name. It had been about a month since he had told her that he didn't have feelings for her but somehow just a mere mention had the ability to drop her to her knees. She rolled her eyes, she'd seen the way that Remus had been behaving recently. He'd been as much of an active participant in the pranking and goofing off as the rest had been. What had gotten into him? Had she even known him at all? Apparently not. The Remus that Claire knew would have never had an interest in any of those things, his companionship with Sirius, James, and Peter was due to his ability to see past their foolishness and enjoy who they actually were when they weren't mucking everything up.

"Yes, _poor_ Remus-"

"And then there's Potter," Lily continued as if she hadn't heard a word that Claire said, "He's been particularly insistent about this upcoming Hogsmeade weekend-"

"Oh, that's why you're in a huff-"

"I literally watched him stand on his seat in the Great Hall," Lily stopped walking and gestured wildly, "And announce to the whole of Gryffindor that he will be accompanying me to Hogsmeade as his date. Can you believe that? It wasn't even a question, just an assumed yes."

"I can-"

"In what reality does he think that I would _ever_ say yes to him?" Lily looked about to explode, hands shaking at her sides, "After how he has behaved for the last five years and his incessant need to bully Severus-" Her voice broke slightly, "He has no respect for who I am or what I like… Just the way that he acted when he asked was a prime example of that."

"I'm assuming you said no then," Claire raised her brow at Lily, hoping to finally get a word in the conversation without being cut off.

"Of course I said no!" Lily said emphatically, "I made sure everyone within earshot heard me say no."

Claire almost felt a pang of guilt, she knew the feeling of being rejected all too well. Sure, James would bounce back pretty quickly- as this wasn't his first try at asking Lily out- but that had to sting. How did he manage to take it so cooly all of the time? Didn't he find it at all painful? Claire would ask him about it, to see if he had any tips for recovering from rejection but that would mean having to admit that she had been rejected by Remus. She suspected that Sirius and James knowing about the kiss and the subsequent heartbreak would lead to a great deal of awkwardness within their social group. So, Claire kept it to herself. Remus seemed more than happy to do the same.

"Chocolate?" Claire opened the drawer next to her bed and pulled out some of the sweets she had stockpiled from her last trip to Hogsmeade. Lily gratefully took one of the delicate chocolates and ate it with a sigh, "Don't let him get to you, Lily. The more of a reaction you give the more likely he is to do it again."

"I know," She plopped down onto Claire's bed and reached for another chocolate, "I really shouldn't dignify him with a response."

The two girls sat there in silence for a moment, eating their chocolates and ruining their appetite for dinner. Claire felt as though the letter she had shoved under her pillow was burning a hole through the mattress, she desperately wanted to pull it out again and continue to read it but she felt rather self-conscious with Lily nearby. Throwing her body back to lay flat on the bed, Lily looked over at Claire and gave her a sympathetic glance.

"I'm sorry…" Claire shoved a chocolate unceremoniously into her mouth so that she wouldn't need to respond at least for a few moments, she knew that tone far too well, "For mentioning Remus. I know you would rather not talk about it-"

"It's fine" Claire grumbled.

"Do you think the two of you will ever get back to- you know, normal?"

What even _was_ normal anymore? It was hard to recall how they were before she had developed feelings for him or viewed him in a romantic way. Sometimes it felt as though she had always had feelings for him and it was hard to differentiate when it had begun to influence the way she interacted with Remus. Regardless, it seemed hard to believe that anything would get back to the way it was before. Claire supposed she and Remus would find a new version of normal; however, it was with great difficulty that Claire ever saw herself being happy in a friendship with him in which he found himself dating or kissing another girl. The thought caused a wave of anxiety to wash over her.

"I'm not sure…"

"Claire," Lily reached forward and touched her arm gently, "Maybe it would easiest if you just…. Moved on all together. I know he means a lot to you-"

"Lily-" Claire's voice had a warning tone to it, having heard this spiel many times before.

"Don't- I know that you're going to tell me that he's too important and you've been friends for too long," Lily gave her a stern look, "But he hurt you… He kissed you and then without warning rejected you- for the life of me I can't figure out why because it seems completely unlike him… but being around him is just going to continue to cause you pain."

"Please," Claire begged, "You and I both know where this conversation leads. I tell you that I am not willing to give up the friendship and you insist that I should and then I ask you about Severus to make a point and then we both become irritated with each other. I'm too distracted today to do it, let's just skip the whole thing."

"Fine," Lily gave an exasperated sigh, "Do you want to go to Hogsmeade with me since I definitely won't be going with Potter?"

"Sure," Claire smiled, she pushed the letter further underneath the pillow knowing she wasn't ready to deal with the contents just yet. For now, she just wanted to spend time with Lily and keep things as uncomplicated as possible.

* * *

 **A/N: Happy Friday everyone! This chapter is a bit longer which I hope makes up for the fact that I won't be able to post next week due to travel for Thanksgiving. However, I will be back on December 1st. I hope that you enjoy the chapter, as always your favorites/follows/reviews mean a great deal to me. Cheers!**


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

The air hung with oppressive humidity as Claire lay helplessly on her bed. It was hot outside, so hot that any of the slightest movements that she made seemed to cause her to break out in a sweat. Letters written on yellowing parchment were strewn around her the handwriting varying from precise and loopy to scratchy and nearly illegible, a few small parcels were sitting beneath these letters filled with sweets, books, and a new set of intricate quills. The cage tucked in the corner of her room was empty, a few stray owl treats laying unceremoniously at the bottom next to droppings. Artemis had been sent out earlier in the day with a handful of thank you notes for her friends and a lengthy reply that she had owed Bertram for weeks now.

Claire was officially sixteen years old and in a little under two months she would be starting her second-to-last year in school. Although the state of her room- owl cage and spell books spread around the tiny space with no attempt to hide them- may have led someone to believe that things had evolved over the last five years, very little had actually changed in her home life. While it should have been a momentous occasion, as it was not every day that your only child turned sixteen, her father had still snuck away in the very early morning and had plans to spend his entire day at the church. His congregation needed him, or at least that's what he had told her.

Her mother had run to the store to pick up some last minute groceries; while Claire had been given the option to go with her mother, she felt quite comfortable laying in front of the oscillating fan staring at the cracks in the ceiling. If she listened hard enough she could hear cars a couple blocks over honking at each other and children playing in the tidy backyard a few houses down. There was something comforting about the silence, enveloping her like a hug from an old friend.

As she let out a contented sigh, relishing in the quiet, there was a sudden thud at her open window. For a moment, she thought that she was imagining it, but then it happened again. Rising slowly from the bed she pulled her hair up into a ponytail away from her sweaty neck and then took quick steps over to the window. A rock flew up and thudded against the siding, Claire pushed her face up against the screen, attempting to look down into the yard. Her blue eyes scanned the freshly mowed lawn and landed upon a well-built boy with dark hair that was pushed back from his face.

A grin appeared on his face and before Claire could open her mouth to scold him for potentially damaging her home he lifted a finger to his lips to indicate she should stay quiet. Then he enthusiastically motioned for her to join him in the yard. Claire rolled her eyes, what was _Sirius_ doing here? He was quite lucky that neither of her parents were home, they likely wouldn't respond well to him showing up uninvited and requesting that she sneak out of the house to join him. Making her way down the stairs and out the back door she shook her head as she approached him.

"What are you doing _here_?"

"You have the oddest way of saying hello," He smirked at her, running his fingers through his hair, a few rogue strands falling in his eyes as he did so.

"And you have a way of dodging my questions," Claire stopped a few feet away from him, "You know I'm not allowed to have visitors, Sirius."

"I was in the neighborhood," He closed the gap between them and held a parcel out for her with his left hand, "Just taking my daily walk and I passed by this house and I thought to myself… I think that it's Claire's birthday today, maybe I should just stop in and say hello."

"You're lucky my parents aren't here-"

"Well," Sirius shoved the gift toward her and raised his brow, urging her to take it. Claire delicately accepted it and tilted her head at him, it wasn't like him to buy her things, "Funny story, I may have _borrowed_ James' cloak and camped out in those shrubs over there until they left. For a moment I thought your dad saw me when I rolled over-"

"Sirius!"

"Oh come on, everything was fine," He smirked, tucking the invisibility cloak under his arm, "You worry too much-"

"Because I'm the one who has to live with the consequences when you leave-"

"What's life without some consequences?" Claire narrowed her eyes at him as he spoke, of course he felt that way. He was Sirius Black, his ability to roll the consequences off of his back like water over a duck's feathers was clearly some genetic skill that he had been given at birth.

"How did you manage to nick James' cloak?" She asked curiously, her fingers fiddling with the package he had handed her, "He doesn't exactly lend it out to people."

"Oh, I will give it back to him tonight,"

"Are you staying with the Potter's tonight?"

"I'm staying with the Potter's indefinitely," He said flatly, rubbing the back of his neck as he did so.

"What happened?"

"I just couldn't- living with them and their ridiculous beliefs. It was time to get out," Claire reached forward to him instinctively but he shrugged away from her, "That's not why I'm here though, I came here for your birthday-"

"Why didn't you write and tell me?"

"It's not a big deal," Claire disagreed entirely, it was a very big deal. She had known that Sirius and his parents had a strained relationship, but so did she and she wasn't moving out of their house to live with a friend, "The Potter's seem happy to have me- at least I know that James is enthusiastic about my presence. If I have to play Quidditch one more time so he can show off though-"

"It's a big deal-"

"Do you want to open your gift?" Claire knew that he was intentionally changing the subject, but it was useless to continue to press the topic, "Not to brag, but I did a really great job picking it out if I do say so myself." The light behind his eyes was returning and Claire could tell he was more comfortable avoiding the topic of his parents.

"If this is some kind of dungbomb I'm going to be livid-"

"Just open it!" He extended his hand forward and it brushed up against hers, Claire couldn't help but smile at him. Feigning disinterest, she shrugged and then slowly unwrapped the parcel to see a delicate gold necklace with a locket on it. Her eyes looked at Sirius for a moment who was positively beaming and then she took in the necklace again, noticing the image inside of the locket of the Marauders and herself, all waving and smiling up at her, "It will stop moving if you need it to so, you know- your father won't forbid you to wear it or anything. Do you like it?"

"It's lovely!" Stepping forward she embraced him quickly before pulling away, "Thank you!"

"Here, let me help you," Sirius placed James' cloak on the ground and grabbed the necklace, and indicated for Claire to turn around. He fumbled with the clasp, his warm breath against the back of her neck. Claire bit her lip to keep from laughing as he muttered some curse words quietly, the small clasp difficult to manage with his large fingers. He was being so gentle, so thoughtful. She almost began to wonder if he was playing some elaborate prank on her.

"We don't usually exchange gifts,"

"I know," Sirius shrugged, his eyes still glued to the clasp that continued to give him a difficult time, "I just figured that- well, you turned sixteen and that's kind of a big deal- there we go."

Sirius stepped around to face her and Claire looked down at the necklace, her friends in the image still smiling away. Sirius reached forward and tapped the top of the locket, the image went still. He looked up and met her eyes, Claire felt herself blush slightly in response. She was still thoroughly confused about his unexpected gift but decided it wasn't worth an argument.

"Thank you," She murmured, "It's perfect."

"So I was thinking-"

"Claire!" Her mother's distant voice could be heard through the open windows of her home, "Come help me with the groceries!" Claire's eyes opened wide and then she glanced over her shoulder in a panic.

"You have to-"

"I know," Sirius picked the cloak up off of the ground and ran it between his fingers, "Before I do though-"

"Claire!" Nervously, she handed the parcel to Sirius so to leave no evidence of his presence in her backyard, "Where are you?"

"I have to go-" Sirius reached forward and grabbed her hand as she went to walk away. Claire felt her pulse quicken, fairly certain that it was the anxiety of the situation that was causing her heart to thump away in her chest and not his rough fingers against her skin.

"Next Wednesday," There was an eagerness behind his eyes as he spoke, "You think you could sneak away? There's a park a couple blocks away from here-"

"I'm not sure-"

"What day would work best?"

"Sirius-"

"Claire!" Her mother's voice was getting closer now. Claire pulled her hand from Sirius' grasp.

"My mum and dad go to church on Sunday," Claire whispered, playing nervously with the locket, opening and closing it quickly, "I can sneak away then- what is this about?"

"Every Sunday, then," Sirius nodded, "Meet me at the park."

"Why?"

"I just want to see you," Sirius reached forward and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear gently. Claire gave him a puzzled look and he smiled in response, "Just promise you'll meet me."

"I promise, now _go_!"

Sirius threw the cloak over his shoulders and with a smirk he disappeared. Claire let out a sigh of relief and then turned on her heels to head back to the house. At that moment she locked eyes with her mother who was standing at the kitchen window in clear view of where Sirius had just been standing. Judging by the serious look on her face, Claire concluded that she had seen everything. With slumped shoulders, Claire walked into the house the screen door echoing as it slammed behind her.

"Who was that?"

"A friend from school," Claire avoided eye contact as she spoke, finding it best to look at the floor.

"Is he why you chose not to come to the store with me?"

"No!" Claire blurted out, hoping that she sounded honest in her response, "I promise, mum, I didn't know that he was coming by. I didn't ask for him to come here."

"Are you dating him?" Mrs. Ludgrove began to unpack the groceries, placing the cans in the pantry and the vegetables in the sink to be rinsed. Claire shook her head adamantly. Is that what her mother actually thought? That Sirius was her boyfriend, dropping by when the house was empty to see her? Claire's cheeks went pink.

"What- No!"

"He's surprising you on your birthday, that sure seems like he might-"

"We are _just_ friends," Claire said emphatically, embarrassed that her mother had even implied that something romantic was going on between them. Sirius made her absolutely crazy; his and James' incessant need to constantly be developing a new prank or bullying some unsuspecting Slytherin caused her a pretty consistent headache. Sure, Sirius was fiercely protective of her and she couldn't imagine not being friends with him, but she was fairly certain that if she ever even considered dating him they would bicker all of the time.

"Alright," Mrs. Ludgrove nodded her head in the direction of the vegetables and Claire walked over obediently and began to rinse them and place them on a towel on the counter. They worked quietly in silence for a few moments before Mrs. Ludgrove spoke again, "Will you tell me if you do?"

"What?" Claire's brow furrowed in confusion.

"If you do date him- or anyone for that matter… will you tell me?"

"You…" Her voice caught in her throat for a moment before she could choke out the rest of the question, "You would want to know?"

"Yes," Mrs. Ludgrove's back was to Claire, arms stretched above her reaching the highest shelf in the pantry, "You're my daughter, why wouldn't I want to know that?"

The water continued to run in the sink as Claire stood and examined her mother for a moment, wondering what to say in response. Instead, she decided to say nothing and continue to work silently in the kitchen as they prepared for dinner side-by-side.

* * *

"You'd think they have it out for us with the length of these essays," James groaned, rubbing his quill hand furiously. Remus was beside him hunched over his parchment his quill flying across the page as he worked tirelessly to complete his essay for History of Magic.

"Maybe it's all of the pranks you play," The corner of Remus' mouth turning up into a smirk as he spoke, his eyes still glued to his parchment, "The professors decided that you have too much time on your hands."

"If anything we use pranks as a form of procrastination from the loads of homework we're given," Sirius' barking laughter filled up the library, which earned him a stern look from Madam Pince, "If they gave us less then maybe we'd find more productive ways to use our time."

"We'd be the best students if we weren't under all of this pressure-"

"N.E.W.T.s in every subject," Sirius chuckled, twirling his quill between his fingers playfully.

"You're a Prefect," James whined at Remus, "Couldn't you do something about that?"

"Yes, I'll owl all of the professors right now," He said dryly. Sirius stared at him as he continued to write his essay, clearly disinterested in engaging in their shenanigans. Sometimes he wondered what on earth had possessed them to become friends with Moony, he was a little too serious for his taste. Sure, he had a few months where he had surprisingly gone full speed ahead with all of his adventurous ideas but that was quite the anomaly. An anomaly that was short-lived as he was back to his usual self the beginning of their sixth year at Hogwarts. Now that Remus was his typical studious self, Sirius was fairly certain he would have strong opposition to any fun activity that he and James planned.

"I don't like it when you tease us like that, Moony," James said with a glare.

"Noted," Remus said with a slight chuckle.

"Where's Peter?" James began to look around the library, clearly growing bored with the topic of conversation since Remus wasn't willing to play along. Sirius shrugged in response.

"Last I saw him was at the end of History of Magic," Remus appraised his essay as he spoke, making notes as he went along.

"Probably went back for a nap-"

"As we should have all done," Sirius thought longingly of his bed, it seemed like it had been ages since he had last lay in it.

"I thought he said he went to send a letter," James said curiously.

"That was hours ago-" Remus looked up briefly at his friends.

"Well, we can ask him, here he comes," James tilted his head in the direction of a row of books where a short round boy was scurrying toward them, a few books tucked under his right arm. "Where've you been?" Peter sat down at the table as James spoke, plopping his books loudly in front of him.

"Oh- uh… Owlery-" Peter spoke with a squeaky voice.

"How long does it take you to send a letter Wormtail?" James laughed casually as he crumpled up a piece of parchment and tossed it in the air before catching it deftly.

"I got sidetracked for a bit, I saw-"

"Could you three keep your voices down?" Remus finally looked up to make eye contact with each of them, "I'm actually trying to work as opposed to the rest of you-"

"Gossip, Peter? Really?" James scoffed, with a roll of his eyes, "What do you think you could have seen that we don't already know about?"

"Oh- I mean…" Peter went a bit pink and he busied himself with his books, "I just thought Sirius would want to know that I saw Claire with Bertram Aubrey."

Sirius felt his stomach clench slightly, Aubrey had continued to linger even after the accident in Herbology all of those years ago. The boy didn't seem capable of getting the hint. Part of that was obviously Claire's fault, she insisted on going out of her way to be kind to him. It was a quality that Sirius admired but simultaneously irked him. Wasn't it just plain mean to continue to lead Bertram on like that? At some point, politeness had just provided him with false hope.

James looked at Sirius and raised his brow, curious to see what his response would be. Sirius hated that knowing look. James was his best mate and he told him everything, but ever since Sirius had moved in with the Potters over the summer that meant James was privy to exactly how much Sirius wrote to Claire. If the daily letters hadn't been suspicion enough, Sirius' weekly disappearance didn't do much to quell his best friend's curiosity. Every Sunday, the pair would sit and talk, sometimes Claire would bring cookies or a pie for the two of them to snack on.

After a couple weeks of Sirius' dodging his questions, James finally decided there was no option but to tail his best friend. James sat in confusion a few feet away beneath his invisibility cloak in a park wondering what on earth Sirius was doing there. It wasn't until he saw Sirius stand up and brush some stray pieces of grass off of his trousers that he noticed Claire approaching. When arriving home later that afternoon, James cornered Sirius and asked exactly what was going on between himself and Claire. Sirius insisted that it was nothing, just a meeting between two friends with complex family situations, but James wasn't buying it.

The rest of the summer he dropped small snide comments about Sirius' whereabouts on Sundays and teased him mercilessly about fancying Claire. In response, Sirius had begun pelting Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans at him across the room that they were sharing. Unfortunately, due to James' Quidditch skills most of the time Sirius missed but once he caught him off guard and managed to get him squarely in the nose. It had served him right, giving Sirius a hard time about his meetings with Claire especially given how many times Sirius had seen James standing in front of the mirror practicing asking Evans on a date.

Maybe- just _maybe_ \- Sirius had developed _slight_ feelings for Claire. He wasn't about to admit it to anyone, but those days the park had become some of his best memories. Once Claire was out of the academic setting and there was no pressure of upcoming exams or essays she became a person he not only tolerated but someone he looked forward to spending time with. Her melodic laughter seemed to dance on the warm breeze that surrounded them and her eyes sparkled when she listened to him tell a story.

Sirius wouldn't trade his friendship with James, Remus, or Peter for anything but there was something to be said about having Claire around. She wasn't the first one he would go to for planning a prank or playing a round of Exploding Snap, but it was far easier to open up to her about his family than it was his other friends. There was something about the emotional support that she so selflessly provided that made him feel at ease. Sirius knew that James would always be willing to listen to him, but he knew that it would be rather likely that James would try to solve the problem instead of just listen. With Claire, there was no judgment, no offering of solutions, just quiet support.

"And I thought Gryffindors were the stubborn ones," Sirius scoffed, thinking of Aubrey and his relentless efforts to ask Claire out over the years, "I hope Claire let him down gently this time."

"I don't," James laughed, "Maybe if she was a bit more direct he'd get the hint."

"I somehow doubt it," Sirius rolled his eyes, "If he was going to get any hints he would have stopped trying years ago, the thick git." Remus started to mutter under his breath.

"Something to add Moony?" James asked coyly, tapping his quill on the desk in front of him, "Or are you still insisting on doing your homework?"

"You make it out like Aubrey is some dim-witted troll but," Remus said, his lips forming a tight line between words, "I'm fairly certain if Claire didn't want him around, he wouldn't be."

"What are you implying?" Sirius added with a disgusted tone.

"I'm not implying anything," Remus said dryly, giving Sirius a stern look, "I'm just saying that Claire is almost as strong-willed as you are. If she didn't want to spend time with him, she would make that clear."

"Oh come off it," James chuckled, pushing the idea away almost as though it were a fly buzzing around his ear, "Claire is polite to everyone. I've even seen her be polite to some of the Slytherins who say horrible things about her-"

"There's a difference between politeness and actively socializing," Remus looked back at his parchment, his quill poised to write more, "Regardless, if Sirius really wants to know what is going on with her and Aubrey he could just ask. No need to send Peter on a mission to spy on her."

"He didn't!" Peter added too quickly, his voice nervous and his fingers trembling slightly.

"It was pretty easy to deduce, no point in lying about it now-"

"I just thought it would be worth it to keep an eye on her," Sirius said casually, trying to not let on that it bothered him how quickly Remus had figured it out. Moony had been the only one at the table who hadn't known about his agreement with Peter. Hell, even James had promised to keep an eye out for Bertram Aubrey when he was in and out of the castle for Quidditch practices. "I'm doing what any good friend would do."

"Sure," Remus didn't look up from his parchment, but his face appeared unamused. Sirius rolled his eyes in response.

"At least we don't have to speculate anymore if he's still lingering around-" James tossed the small ball of parchment from his left to his right hand and back again as he spoke.

"That's not all," Peter said leaning forward so that he could lower his voice, "He actually asked her to go to Hogsmeade with him tomorrow."

"Finally got some courage in his sixth year I see," James chuckled, "Were a lot of people around to see his rejection?"

Peter fidgeted nervously for a moment, swallowing hard. Remus looked up with mild interest at their silence. Sirius could hear the blood rushing in his ears, why hadn't Peter immediately answered the question? He felt his stomach drop slightly in anticipation.

"She rejected him… right?" Sirius' voice was barely a whisper, his fingers gripping the edge of the wooden table so hard that his knuckles were white.

"Claire said yes."

* * *

Remus stood in awkward silence outside of Professor McGonagall's office beside James and Peter. The trio had been waiting what felt like the better part of an hour for Sirius to emerge from the doorway. However, the longer they waited the less hopeful that Remus felt about Sirius' odds of not being expelled. Although Remus would have rather waited for their friend back in the Gryffindor Common Room, James had been insistent that they wait just outside of McGonagall's office. This meant that Remus would be subjected to the immense guilt that would descend upon him when their head of house made eye contact with him.

As a Prefect, he should have done _something_. The more time that passed since the incident the more ideas that came to him. Remus could have looked for a professor to intervene. He could have attempted to talk Sirius out of it. He could have given Bertram Aubrey a heads up so that he was on guard instead of just standing there defenseless. Instead, what he did was stand there and do nothing while Sirius spiraled out of control at an impressive speed.

Truth be told, this wasn't the first time that the rest of the Marauders had stood outside of an office waiting for their friend to emerge with what would feel like years worth of detentions. However, this was the worst incident in their years together. Remus had always known that Sirius had a short fuse and very little impulse control, but this honestly was the worst he had ever seen.

After Peter announced to the group that Claire would be Bertram Aubrey's date to Hogsmeade the following day, Sirius had a scowl on his face. No amount of jokes, offer of pranks, or rounds of Exploding Snap seemed to be able to pull him out of his eternally grumpy mood. Peter was particularly quiet, feeling bad for being the reason that Sirius was seemingly walking around with a rain cloud surrounding his head and James was on board with blaming him for the entire ordeal.

Remus had an ominous feeling, about all of it. Sirius' reaction wasn't what he had been expecting. It would have been less concerning if Sirius had argued with Claire or spent the rest of the afternoon making fun of Bertram Aubrey, but the silence that ensued was entirely alarming. It felt as though Sirius were bottling up the entire situation and attempting to repress it. That should have been Remus' first clue that something was about to go horribly wrong.

While heading down to dinner in the Great Hall, Remus spotted a group of Hufflepuffs up ahead. Bertram Aubrey was in the center of them, a bright smile on his face. For a moment, Remus almost felt happy for him. After years of embarrassing encounters and a sluggish attempt at becoming friends with Claire, he had finally gotten her to agree to go on a date with him. Remus tried to squash down the feeling of jealousy that rose in his chest, reminding himself that Bertram was a much better- and safer- option for her than he was. Claire deserved to be happy, if Bertram could make her happy then he would do everything he could to support it.

Sirius didn't seem to be sharing the same feelings of supportive loyalty. The moment that Peter pointed out the group, his jaw clenched. In a split second, everything seemed to happen in simultaneous slow motion and double time. Sirius broke from the group and edged his way over to Bertram Aubrey. Before the boy could even recognize who was behind him, Sirius raised his wand and muttered a few words. A flash of white light hit Bertram and all of the students heading to dinner watched as his head quickly began to increase in size.

In the blink of an eye, his head had increased in size so much so that his friends had to help hold it up. A few first year students had rushed into the Great Hall to get a professor and some older students ran forward to pull Sirius away from Aubrey as he lobbed insults in his direction and threw his fists around attempting to get a good punch at his abnormally sized head. Bertram was escorted to the Hospital Wing by multiple professors and soon after the chaos died down Sirius stomped away behind a very fierce looking Professor McGonagall.

"Do you think he's going to be expelled?" Peter said quietly, looking at the ground in front of him.

"There's a good chance-" Remus rubbed at his temples exasperatedly. He couldn't possibly see a way out of this one for Sirius.

"You shouldn't have pointed him out," James said sliding down the wall and sitting on the cold stone floor beneath him, "You should have kept it to yourself-"

"Stop it, James," Remus glared at him, "You and I both know that this was bound to happen regardless. Peter pointing out that Aubrey was up ahead just sped up the inevitable."

"Can you blame Sirius?"

"Yes," Remus looked at the door instead of James, "I can and I do."

The door opened at that moment and Sirius emerged looking quite subdued. Behind him was a fuming Professor McGonagall, Remus avoided eye contact with her and instead studied Sirius who was slumped over in defeat. James stood quickly and brushed off his robes, Peter immediately shoved his hands into his pockets and went very red in the face.

"All of you head back to your dormitories immediately," Her voice pierced the silence of the corridor, "If I hear that you took even the slightest detour, all of you will be in detention for the rest of your time here at Hogwarts. Do I make myself perfectly clear?"

"Yes, Professor." James' voice was incredibly serious. The door closed with a snap behind Professor McGonagall and the four stood silently in the hall for a moment before making their way back up to the Gryffindor Common Room. Their footsteps echoed as they trudged the many stairs and clambered through the portrait hole and into the warm and welcoming room. Sirius threw himself onto an empty couch and stared at the fire blankly.

"Did you- did you get expelled?" Peter squeaked.

"You think I would be sitting here if I had been Wormtail?" Sirius' voice was icy, the usual light behind his eyes completely absent, "I'm going to be spending the next three months cleaning owl droppings out of the Owlery without magic. Oh, and I lost Gryffindor two hundred forty points."

"Two hundred forty?" James' mouth hung open as he stared at his friend.

"It was an even two hundred," Sirius muttered, "But then I said that Aubrey deserved what he got and lost an additional ten."

"And the last thirty?" Remus almost regretted asking it when Sirius glared at him.

"When she took the ten, I told her that she was a fascist."

"Where in the hell is he?" Remus turned on his heel when he heard the portrait hole slam closed. Long wavy hair was trailing behind Claire as she made her way, very red in the face, into the common room. Immediately James stepped forward between the pair, anticipating the fight that would be in their immediate future, "What is _wrong_ with you?" She spat at Sirius, he sat up and glared at her.

"What's wrong with _me_?" He shook his head in disbelief, "What's wrong with you? Really lowered your standards this year, have you?"

"You are unbelievable!"

"What's unbelievable is that you said yes! After _everything_ \- you said yes… to him!"

"Of course I did," Claire said with an exasperated tone, "He's kind and smart and he doesn't go around hexing people with their backs turned-"

"If I had known you were that desperate for a date-"

"I am _not_ desperate!"

"There are plenty of Gryffindors who are a much better match for you than he is-"

"Like who?" Claire stepped forward and angrily shoved her finger into his chest, James attempted to wedge his way between them, "Like _you_?"

"I didn't say-"

"Well, congratulations," Claire rolled her eyes at him, "You were successful today at hexing Bertram's head so large that it almost- _almost_ \- rivals the size of your ego."

"What were you expecting?" Sirius spat at her, eyes narrowed, "Me to congratulate you on your upcoming date? After you led me on all summer?"

" _Led you on_?"

"What did you think?" Sirius stepped forward, the space between them very small now. James had given up trying to break them apart and instead stood at a safe distance away as if they were both a bomb about to explode at any moment, "That I just dropped by every week this summer because I like spending time in the park?"

Remus felt his jaw clench slightly as he watched. It was becoming perfectly clear that he was not the only one who had been harboring feelings for Claire. How had he been so blind that he hadn't seen it before now? The feeling of jealousy that popped up when he saw Bertram swelled in his chest again, but now even more intense than it had been before. At least with Claire dating Bertram, Remus wouldn't need to be subjected to the two staring longingly at each other during classes or in the Common Room. With Sirius, there would be a constant reminder that Claire was moving on.

"We are friends," Claire gave him a hurt look, "It isn't unreasonable for me to expect that we spend time together without you pushing some kind of ulterior motive-"

"Is that all we are? Friends?"

"I-" Claire backed up, looking slightly taken aback before she steadied her expression and glared once more, "So you did this out of jealousy?"

"Me jealous of Aubrey? What is there to be jealous of?"

"You _are_ jealous-"

"Go out with him if that's what you want, see if I care-"

"I will!" Claire stomped away toward the stairs, James at her heel attempting to drag her back to work things out, "Here's a friendly tip- for _both_ of you-" Claire stopped at the bottom of the stairs and narrowed her eyes at Sirius and then at James, "If you two would grow up and stop pranking everyone and copying off your friends homework, maybe you'd both have dates to Hogsmeade other than each other."

"Maybe if you weren't so entirely stubborn," Sirius chortled, "You'd have a date with a normal sized head."

With that, Claire rushed up the stairs and slammed the door to her room. Remus watched as Sirius threw himself back onto the couch, staring longingly up at the girl's dormitory for a moment before rolling to his side and closing his eyes.

* * *

 **A/N: Sorry for my delayed absence everyone! Things have been incredibly hectic at work and it has really restricted the amount of time I have had to write. However, I'm back and I hope to be back to posting on Fridays until I finish this story. Thanks so much for your patience while I've been gone. I promise you, I am not abandoning this story and you will get an ending. As always, I appreciate your favorites, follows, and reviews. Happy reading!**


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